So Sue Me: Self Inserts at World's End
by Isaviel Snape
Summary: A magic compass sends two girls to a world where pirates face extinction and find themselves in the middle of the battle for the open seas and their own freedom. They're mad, coz THAT'S HOW THEY ROLL. R&R MarySueParody WTxOC & JNxOC COMPLETE!
1. The Compass

**Summary**: A magic compass sends two girls to a world where pirates face extinction. They find themselves in the middle of the battle for the open seas and their own freedom. They're batshit, cause THAT'S HOW THEY ROLL. R&R SueParodySelfInsert. WTxOC, CBxOC

**A/N:** This is basically a rewrite of the "Curse of the Mary Sue" fic I had before. Unfortunately I wasn't happy with it at all, and this is the result. That, and my undying love for the epicness that is At World's End. Frankly, that level of eyegasm material is quite obscene (and totally, totally appreciated. LOVE.)

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

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**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter One: The Compass**

**I. **

"I feel like such a dork for liking antiques. Really I do."

Isaviel Gale didn't look up from the glass cabinet she was peering into, apparently distracted by the plentiful shinies that lay in there, calling to her. She gave a small noise of contemplation before replying. "People just don't know how to appreciate the vintage awesome."

She and best friend Theoli Runkle were regular visitors to the antique store in their small home town, always eager to find some sort of valuable or otherwise interesting item to buy. They always left with something they had purchased, only to find later that it was worth less than what they'd paid for it and eventually ended up putting it in a box in the back of the store-cupboard to be forgotten. Apparently they had more money than sense, which is pretty impressive since they're nearly always broke.

"Hey, check this out."

Isa looked. Theo was rooting through a tatty cardboard box.

"This stuff is awesome."

She brought the box over and put it onto a nearby desk so Isa could look at it. It seemed to be a pretty old box filled with nautical items like compasses and telescopes. On the side, in big capital letters, were the words 'magical objects'. Isaviel raised an eyebrow.

"Magical objects?"

"Apparently so- oh hey look!" She held up a silver ring, set with a green stone. "How pretty is this?"

Isa had her eye on something else. Curiosity piqued, she reached into the box and pulled out a box small enough to fit into the palm of her hand. Upon lifting the lid she found that it was a compass, although one that seemed to be broken since no matter which way she turned it the needle didn't move.

"That compass be magical, y'know."

Isaviel jumped at the voice and accidentally elbowed Theo in the stomach, causing her to grunt and stumble backwards. She clambered to help her friend to her feet. "Oh, God. Theo, sorry-" She glanced at the owner of the voice. "More to the point, don't sneak up on someone like that!"

There stood an old man in old, worn clothes with a patch that covered his right eye, who was looking through the box of stuff whilst Theo got her bearings back. Before the girls could say anything else he gave them a grin, showing off his half-rotten teeth. The girls winced.

"Y' int'rested in somethin' from this here box?"

"I... suppose so," Isa said, realising that she was still holding the compass. "Do these objects have some sort of history?"

"Oh aye," he said. "Aye, that they do."

A moment of awkward silence.

Theoli raised an eyebrow. "...well... are you going to tell us?"

"Oh, ye wants ter know now?"

"Well yeah, that would be pretty helpful."

"'Fraid I don't know anythin'." He shrugged at the dismayed looks on the girls' faces. "Hey, ye can read, can't ye?" He pointed to the label on the box. "They be _magical_."

"Magical."

"Aye."

"Like... how?"

"I dunno."

"So you don't know if they are magical or not?"

"No, I know they be magical."

"How?"

"It says so on the box." He pointed to the label as if this validated his point.

"Oh..."

The girls didn't bother continuing the conversation any more, sensing that it was probably a pointless exercise to do so. So eventually they decided to buy some of those 'magical items', which were apparently rather cheap for things that were so obviously really magical. Since Theo thought it was a bargain she ended up buying practically the entire box, whereas Isa only bought the compass.

Theo rooted through the box as they stood on the platform waiting for the train home. "Why didn't you buy some of this stuff? It's shiny!"

"I dunno, guess I kinda like this."

The compass hadn't been fixed or anything, but Isa couldn't help but open it up and look at the red arrow, wondering what adventures the small, battered little box had been on during it's lifetime. Of course it could be some cheap old mass-produced thing from recent years but something about it told her that it was the real deal; it was almost like the compass was whispering to her, wanting to tell her all about its life. She didn't say that out loud though, she didn't really want Theo to think she was crazy.

So she put the compass in her pocket and in the confusion and stress over delayed trains and platform changes managed to forget about it, and the feelings it gave her, entirely.

In fact, it wasn't until far into the evening when Theo asked to look at it that Isa remembered it at all. She rifled through her jacket pockets until she got it, then tossed it to Theo before settling down to continue watching the latest episode of Supernatural. "You've already seen it loads of times."

"I just want to look. It's kinda cool."

"Don't forget magical."

"Oh, my bad," Theoli snickered. "I wonder why it doesn't work."

Isaviel shrugged, taking the compass back. "I dunno, maybe it's just broken?"

"Try shaking it."

She did so. Nothing happened.

"Hang on." Theo got up and padded through to the kitchen where she grabbed a fridge magnet and came back. "Let's try this."

No matter what she did with the magnet the needle wouldn't move. After a while the girls gave up, and since the TV show was over they decided to call it a night. Theo went to bed as Isa made one last check to see if their flat was locked and secure, then made her way to her room, calling 'good night' to Theoli as she went.

She sat on her bed for a while, just looking at the compass in her hand. Perhaps it _was_ magical in some way. It would certainly explain her own strange behaviour ever since she had the thing in her hand. Setting the compass onto her bedside table she snuggled under her covers and turned off the light. After a while she slowly drifted off to the land of nod, and a dreamless sleep.

The compass by her bed opened soundlessly and of it's own accord, then the needle began to spin. Slowly at first, but then faster and faster until the arrow was but a blur.

Then, it stopped dead.

**II.**

"Isa! Oh Jesus, Isa. WAKE. UP."

"Whaaaat," she groaned, rolling over and burying her face into her pillow. "What time is it?"

"I dunno, you tell me. While you're at it, you can tell me where we are."

Isa groaned again then turned back over, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "I swear, Theo, if this is some crack-ass windup-"

"This would take a little more effort than I'm willing to put in to be a prank. Just open your damn eyes."

She did so, and found herself staring at an altogether unfamiliar ceiling and sleeping in an altogether unfamiliar bed. She blinked. Looking around, the room she was in seemed incredibly dated, with patterned wallpapers and ceiling, though it was in very good condition; not at all dilapidated.

Isa sat up. "What the-"

"See? I woke up in the room next door and just about had a brain spasm. Also, do look at what we're wearing."

Isa looked at Theo's attire. She was wearing an off-white shirt and rich brown britches which were tucked into some quite sexy brown leather boots. A chunky belt was tied around her midriff off of which were all manner of small bits and pieces, keys and such. She also had on a long, plum-coloured coat with gold trimmings and detailing, the pockets of which were filled with money.

When she got out of bed Isa realised she was wearing something pretty similar, though the colours of her own outfit were more greyish, subdued tones of brown. A rich green coat, with trimmings like Theo's, was hung on the back of the door.

Isa went over the window and glanced out and across the landscape. Well, seascape, actually. They were in a building very close to a port where a great number of elaborate, beautifully decorated ships were docked. In the distance she could see many more ships, all sailing off towards the horizon.

"Something tells me we aren't in Kansas anymore, Toto."

Theo stared at the view. "What the hell..."

There was a shout from outside and the girls ducked backwards to avoid being seen.

"They've found another pirate."

"Best leave this one; they look like they have plenty of support."

"You'd think they'd learn by now that they can't hide from us."

The first speaker gave a harsh bark of laughter. "Apparently not. No wonder they're dying out."

"Though Lord Beckett having the heart can't help much either."

The girls listened to the sounds of their laughter getting farther and farther away until they couldn't hear them anymore. They looked at each other, then out of the window, then back at each other. Neither said a thing, not really knowing what they could say that didn't make them sound at all like lunatics.

Theoli sat on a nearby chair. "What's... what's happened?"

Isaviel shrugged, looking down at the ground. Something on her belt caught her eye. "...the compass."

"What?"

"The compass. It's on my belt."

Theo blinked. "So it is. How odd."

Isa unhooked it from her belt and opened it up. "Oh hey, it works!"

"Say... do you think that has something to do with us being here?"

Isa blinked. "What?"

"Well, you know how it's a magical object and all... I just thoug- woah."

"What?

"I'm wearing the ring from the magical items box."

"Dude."

"This shit is freaking me right out."

Isaviel put the compass back on her belt, then gave a heavy sigh. "Well, we'll just have to ask around and get some more information, I guess. I mean, we don't even know where we are in terms of year, let alone geographically."

"We're dressed kind of... piratey, though. Pirates don't seem to be flavour of the month, which is sad because pirates are all kinds of awesome."

Isa looked down at her attire again. "Ah. Yes. Well. We'll just have to avoid getting seen."

Suddenly the doors burst open and the girls found themselves facing ten bayonettes. "Pirates! You're under arrest!"

"Oh, bugger."

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**;D Reviews would be awesometastic.**


	2. I Dream Of Buckets

**A/N:** Thankye for the reviews! O: Glad you like the fic so far.

So this chapter has a bit of stuff from the film. I'm hoping I got it right. D: There'll be a few of those here and there, but not too many. Just enough for the fic's plot to plod along. ;D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

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**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Two: I Dream Of Buckets**

**I. **

Isaviel sighed as she watched Theoli try and shake the cell door open for about the fiftieth time since the officers had thrown the two in there. All of their personal effects had been confiscated, so they had been left with nothing but the clothes they had worn when they were arrested, which was a pain; even their sexy coats had been taken from them. That was the only thing Theo seemed to cause a stink about. Then again, the coats _had_ been pretty hot.

Theo hadn't given up the possibility that this was all a mistake and had been continually protesting her innocence for the past half hour. Isaviel had joined her initially, but she got bored after a few minutes and had opted to lay on the hard bench at the back of the cell and watch her companion.

"Dammit, why won't anybody listen to me?"

"Maybe because we've been accused of being pirates."

"As awesome as it must be to be a pirate, we aren't," Theo rattled the door again. "I need a metal cup to jangle against this thing."

Isa rolled her eyes. "You're only going to wind yourself up even more, you know."

"I know," Theoli said, trying to force her head through the small gaps between the cell bars. "But I want my coat, it's freezing in here."

It was true enough. Even though the sun was blazing outside, the prison cells were sheltered and positioned in a way that meant there was a continuous wind blowing through. The cells themselves were totally empty but for themselves, which begged the question, where were the other pirates that had been arrested? Something told Isa she didn't really want to know.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that they probably won't turn the heat up for us either," Theo continued. "This is so not funny."

Isa decided to try and change the subject, if not to distract Theo to keep herself from also getting frustrated. "So you think our magical objects were _actually_ magical objects?"

"We're stuck in the God knows what century with the items we got from the 'magical items' box, I'd say it was a pretty good bet, don't you?" She, again, tried to rattle the door off its hinges. So much for changing the subject. Theo continued fuming. "I just want to know how they could just _arrest_ us, we're a couple of innocent young girls! I also want to know where my bloody coat is, you whores!"

"Oh yes," came a voice smoother than a glass of Baileys, which was pretty damn smooth. "I can certainly see the innocence just radiating off you."

Isa glanced towards the doorway to the steps without moving her head, hearing the man's footsteps long before he actually came into view. She had to say, she was a little bemused by the figure that appeared; a short man with a white wig, wearing maroon coloured clothing that gave the girls the impression that he was a pretty important person. He approached their cell, hands held behind his back, guards stood at the steps in case these ruthless pirates decided to cause trouble. Pfft. Hardly likely. Well, not in _Isaviel's_ case.

Theo poked her arm through a gap and wafted her finger in his face. "Are you the dude in charge?"

_Here we go,_ Isaviel thought, pushing herself up into a sitting position.

"I am, indeed."

Isaviel narrowed her eyes. "Beckett?"

"That's LORD Beckett to you," one of the guards snapped. He went back to his position after a swift look from the Lord.

"Apologies," Isaviel said. "_Lord_ Beckett."

"Listen," Theoli continued, oblivious to the staring match that had apparently begun between her friend and the man outside the cell. "This is all wrong, we're not pirates."

"Oh? So you have an explanation for your current attire, as well as the money and valuable items that were in your possession?" He reached into his pocket and when he withdrew it, was holding a silver ring in his hand. "As well as for this?"

"Hey!" Theo made grabby-hands. "I bought that!"

"'Bought'?" He gave an incredulous stare. "From whom? Where? When?"

"Bought," she nodded. "From some crazy dude at an antique store, in York, yesterday. Now gimme!"

"I don't suppose it will come as much of a surprise to you that I don't actually believe you." He pocketed the ring, much to Theo's dismay.

"Was there a reason you came to visit us, _Lord _Beckett?" Isaviel stood up and joined her friend at the bars. "Or did you just want to admire the pretty girls?"

Theo blinked and stared at Isa, who was smiling pleasantly enough. Shrugging, she also watched the man to see his reaction.

"Hardly," Beckett sniffed. "I just wanted to ask you about one of the objects in your possession. A compass, to be precise."

"What about it?"

"Why do you have it?"

"To tell us which way points north?"

"Unfortunately, if that's its main purpose then your compass seems to be broken."

Theo gasped. "If you've broken our stu-"

"You see," Beckett continued, cutting Theo off. "I have a compass that's remarkably similar to your own, and I was told the one in my possession was one of a kind."

Isaviel quirked an eyebrow. "Looks like someone lied to you."

"Where did you get it?"

"Bought it."

"Of course," Beckett gave a short sigh. "The same place you bought this ring, I take it?"

"Actually, yeah."

"I see." He seemed to get lost in his thoughts for a few short moments. "Unfortunately for you, I still don't believe you. You will remain here until you deem it fit to tell me the truth," he said. "Believe you me, I'm a _very_ patient man."

"I've no doubt."

He gave a small smile, then turned and walked off without another word, closely followed by his two guards. As intriguing as the encounter had been Isa couldn't help but feel frustrated about the whole ordeal; their compass was obviously something that was sought after, or at the very least the knowledge of why it was broken was sought after. Giving a heavy sigh, she went back to her spot on the bench as Theo hurled abuse after the Lord, who was long gone.

Eventually she sat down beside Isa. "What an _ass_!"

"Yeah," Isa said, distractedly, still thinking about the compass.

Theo sighed. "Dude, I was insulting, not admiring."

"Mm-hmm... Wait, what?"

"You were totally staring at his ass."

"WHEN? He was facing us the entire time!"

Theo waggled her finger and tutted. "Not when he was leaving. BUS-TED."

"Don't be ridiculous," Isa gave a frustrated grunt. "We have more important things to worry about; like how we're _busting_ out of this joint."

"We'll come up with a plan," Theo said. "I know we will."

Three hours later and surprisingly enough they hadn't come up with a plan. Well, actually Theoli had come up with a great many plans but most of them involved either a key, a cannon or a bow and arrow, things that they kind of didn't have in their pockets at that moment in time. The girls soon became bored of just sitting in their cells doing nothing, without any of the many modern comforts they had back at home to entertain them.

"I pine for television," Theo whimpered, lying on the floor in the foetal position. "I needs my electronic entertainments..." She gave a choked sob and hugged her legs to her chest.

Isa rolled her eyes. "Oi, if you're already going crazy, I'm going to apply for a cell change."

Theo sighed in response, rolling flat on her back and having to put her feet up on the wall. "Maybe we're both going crazy. Or maybe this is just a dream I'm having, and if I try hard enough I can wake up!" She then set about writhing on the floor in an effort to 'wake herself up', very slowly coming to the realisation that she perhaps wasn't actually asleep at all. "I don't think we're dreaming."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Hey," Theo looked back. "You okay? You sound groggy."

"Yeah, just feeling a little sick." The feeling had started about an hour ago, a sickness in the pit of her stomach that made her feel as if she'd just stepped off the Oblivion ride at Alton Towers. It had grown steadily worse until Isa eventually had to lay down with her hand covering her eyes. It didn't help much, but she didn't want to move again either.

"Try and get some sleep," Theo said, sitting up. "I'll kick you if something happens."

"Oh gee, thanks," Isa gave a sleepy smirk. She'd have said something else but her tiredness overpowered her thought processes, making her give only murmured replies to whatever Theo was talking about. Pretty soon she had fallen into a deep, uneasy slumber...

**II. **

_Isaviel looked around at the strange and unfamiliar surroundings. The entire place looked like it was build on stilts, platforms raised above the waters of the sea on which houses, and shops were built. Below that level were more buildings, all crammed together as if they'd run out of space to put them elsewhere. She was walking across a rickety-looking bridge that overlooked a 'river' on which was a lone boat and in it, a woman with her face hidden from above by the large straw hat she was wearing, singing to nobody but herself. _

_Isaviel did her best to follow, ducking out of sight as a group of soldiers, led by a rather unfriendly looking man, tromped by and waiting to make sure she wasn't accosted. She hopped along the boardwalk, following the sound of the singing._

_"The bell has been raised from it's watery grave..._ _Do you hear it's sepulchral tone?"_

_Nearby, someone set off a firework that fizzed and crackled loudly, distracting her long enough so that she nearly lost the boat. Luckily she regained her wits and scuttled along, eventually catching up as the boat stopped and its occupant pushed herself out of it. _

_"...hoist the colors high. Heave ho, thieves-"_

_"-and beggars," interjected another voice. "Never, shall we die."_

_Isa ducked out of sight as three men appeared from the shadows. _

_"A dangerous song to be singing," their apparent leader said, "for any who are ignorant of its meaning. Particularly a woman... particularly a woman alone." _

_"What makes you think she's alone?"_

_Another person began descending the stairs. Before any other dialogue was exchanged, things began to grow hazy, and the next thing she knew she was inside a very hot, steamy room. The room was pretty full, but space was made at the head where the man and woman from earlier were stood - well, they were bowing - in front of some bearded guy wearing oriental looking clothing. _

_"Captain Barbossa," said Beardy-McBeard, arms outstretched. "Welcome to Singapore."_

Singapore?_ Isaviel looked around. _What the hell? Why am I in _Singapore_?! This whole 'ending up in a different place to where you fell asleep' thing is getting to be a really, really bad habit.

_Whilst Isaviel had been having a spack-attack, the conversation had continued. When she glanced back there was a rather hot, drenched man stood in an oversized bucket with his hands tied to some sort of restraint. Unfortunately for Isa, there was no chance of talking to him since there seemed to be a confrontation brewing between 'Barbossa' and Beardy. _

_"Captain Sao Feng, I assure you I had no idea-" _

_"That he would get caught?!"_

_The conversation that continued was quite dull, and Isaviel found herself glancing around at the other people in the room. None of them seemed like particularly friendly folk, if she was honest._

_Just when things were about to get juicy, Isa felt a strange pulling in her stomach, like she had a rope around her midriff and someone was pulling it from behind. Suddenly she found herself flying backwards through a haze of colours and sounds, whirling and growing brighter until all she could see was white. _

**III.**

She sat bolt upright with a cry, jerking Theo from her nap.

"Hoshit, where's the fire?!" She flailed a little before she realised what had actually happened. "Jeez. Scare the crap out of me, why don't you?"

"Sorry, bad dream."

"What was it about?"

Isa rubbed her eyes. "I was in Singapore somewhere and there was this pirate called Barbossa and some chick. There was also a hot wet guy in a bucket."

"Ohh, you mean _that_ kind of dream," Theo snickered, waggling her eyebrows, though not for long since she had to duck backwards to avoid getting a boot to the face. "So the hot wet dude, what was his name?"

"I have no idea."

"Dammit."

"I... kind of think it was a premonition. It didn't seem like a normal dream..."

Theo blinked. "Premonition? Like... seeing the future? Are you sure?"

"I don't know, I just get the feeling it was real, and not just some random dream." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm starting to sound really crazy," she muttered.

"You're certainly catching up," Theoli said, giving her friend a sly wink. "Tell me exactly what happened."

So Isaviel explained the dream, going into great detail when explaining the setting and the people within it, growing slightly frustrated when she was trying to explain the conversations but could only manage to give fragments of information. She could remember most of it, just not very much. When she was done, Theoli rubbed her chin, making a thoughtful sound.

"That's quite interesting... Singapore, you say?"

"Yeah. Some dude called Sao Feng-"

A jangling of keys made her stop short. When the person with the keys came into view Isaviel nearly fell off her seat; it was the unfriendly looking dude from her dream! The man approached their cell, regarding them with cold contempt, which only served to remind her to be careful how she says that to Theo - she may come out with something like 'teehee, he's the man of your dreams?'

"Lord Beckett summons you." He gave the guard beside him a sharp nod, signalling him to unlock the door. Once it was open, shackles were put on their wrists before they were pushed quite aggressively from the cells to follow the angry looking nameless dude towards what the girls assumed would be Beckett's office.

Isaviel sighed irritably as she was pushed again. _This is just fan-bloody-tastic._

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**Hope you're liking the fic so far, lovelies! 8D**


	3. Making Deals

**A/N:** I'd like to add, if this chapter doesn't make it clear; the events are pre-AWE at the moment. They get to AWE events pretty soon. 8D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Three: Making Deals**

**I. **

"At least we have our coats back," Theoli said, snuggling into her own.

Isaviel, however, wasn't exactly pleased to be stood where they were stood, which was between two of the tallest guards Beckett could possibly dig up. She nervously fiddled with the cuff of her own coat, nudging Theo. "Any ideas?"

"Oh, yeah. Just flutter your eyelashes at him."

"Excuse me? Why?"

"To seduce him, DUH." Theo gave an exasperated sigh, shaking her head and pointing at her companion when the guard she was stood beside gave her an odd look.

Isa's mind was blank. "...why the hell would I do that?"

"So we can, you know-" she lowered her voice, "Escape?"

Isaviel blinked. She looked to her left, noting that apart from the guard she was standing next to, there was another pair stationed at each of the three doors down the corridor as well as one stood at the end. Looking to her right, she noted the same number of guards. She looked at Theo, who had a look on her face that said 'am I awesome, or am I awesome?'

"Dude. No."

Theo looked crestfallen. "Why?"

"Because I don't fancy getting shot anytime soon."

"What use are those humps of yours if not for use in times of crises like these?!"

Isa shifted to face Theoli, voice rising along with her irritation. "God dammit, Theo, I am not shaking any lady lumps! Not now. Not EVER."

After a moment she realised that everyone in the whole corridor had heard what she'd just proclaimed and were staring at her as if she was stark raving bonkers. Clearing her throat, she shuffled back to her position, trying to ignore the burning sensation in her cheeks which she knew were turning bright red.

"Either way, no."

Theo was too busy trying not to laugh to listen anyway. Isa was about to kick her in the shin to help her from resisting the laughter, but the door in front of them opened and Mr Unfriendlyface was stood there scowling at them.

"Lord Beckett will see you now."

Isa breathed a short sigh of relief, glad to be getting away from the strange looks and snickers. She and Theo followed the man into what was a large office-like room with a large table on which were small model ships. Beckett was sat as a desk to their right in front of which the two girls were lined up and forced to wait whilst he read over some papers. Once he was done, he scrawled his signature at the bottom and handed it to some aide or other who promptly scurried out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Beckett raised an eyebrow. "'Lady lumps'?"

It took all she had for Isaviel to resist slamming her head on the nearest wall or flat surface. Instead, she offered a strained smile. "Small... joke," she said, elbowing Theoli to stop her sniggering.

Beckett gave a thoughtful murmur, then turned back to Mr Unfriendlyface. "Mr Mercer, any new information on the whereabouts of Sao Feng?"

Before Mercer could reply, Theo spoke, "He's in Singapore, isn't he?"

Isa's eyes widened as she slowly turned her head to look at her friend. If she wasn't cuffed, she'd have lamped her. No joke. Beckett regarded her with slight curiosity. "How, pray tell, would you be privy to this information?"

It seemed to dawn on Theo that she'd made a bit of a booboo. "Oh. I... erm." She looked at Isa. "...she saw it."

"What."

Theo gave a sheepishly apologetic grin, then sidestepped a little to avoid getting another elbow to the gut. Beckett's attention turned. "You_saw_ it?" He sounded blatantly unconvinced.

"I did," Isa sighed.

"When?"

"About half an hour ago."

"When you were in the cell?"

"Yes." Isa watched as Beckett and Mercer exchanged glances. "In a dream," she continued regardless. Hell, she was branded as a pirate anyway, why not be branded as a _crazy_ pirate? She motioned to Mercer, "He was there, as well as some woman and a man called Barbossa."

Theo nodded, as if she was vouching for the information.

"Barbossa?"

"Yeah. Scraggly beard, huge hat, pirate-looking fellow."

"And you say Mercer was there?"

"Yeah, along with a cartload of soldiers."

Beckett seemed to ponder for a while. "You saw this in a dream?"

"That's what I said."

He gave a thoughtful 'hrm' but said nothing more, apparently delving deep into his own thoughts for a moment or two. Isaviel took the opportunity to shoot Theo a glare, clearly unimpressed with how the day was rapidly going from bad to worse to _bone_ in a matter of hours. Yes, folks, bone. Cookie for you if you get _that_ reference.

Beckett spoke to Mercer without looking at him. "Look into their claim, will you?"

"Sir?" He didn't bother to hide the bewilderment from his voice.

"Any lead is more than we have right now, unless you have some new information?" Beckett raised his eyebrow at Mercer's silence. "I didn't think so. Do keep me updated, won't you?"

With the look of confusion still on his face he nodded, then left the room, shaking his head like he couldn't believe what had just happened. Hell, the girls didn't either, but they could only believe this was a positive moment among all the crapness of their day.

Beckett got up from his desk and headed to the window, whereupon he opened a wooden box and took out a small object. He turned. "Do you know what this is?"

"My compass?"

"Ah," Beckett gave a small smile. "No. _That_ one would be yours." He nodded to his desk.

Isa glanced down and saw that, yes, there was their compass. Well, another compass at least. Beckett approached them and once he was close enough she looked at the compass that he was holding and wasn't particularly surprised to see that they looked exactly alike, even down to the wear on the edges of the box. Her face must have betrayed the feeling of confusion-slash-'what the fuck?!' that she was currently feeling because the Lord seemed amused by something whilst looking at her. Any other person may have been slightly offended.

"Now, I'm still _very_ curious about where you got that compass."

She glanced at Theo, panicked. Isa knew she was no good at thinking on her toes and while Theo's thinking usually revolved around something cracktacular, it was still thinking, and admittedly she was pretty believable most of the time.

"Well, we really did buy it," Theo began. "But it was from some suspicious man down a dark alley who wanted to be rid of it really, really quickly." She gave a heavy, woeful sigh. "If we'd known how much bother it'd get us into we never would have taken the damn thing."

"I see." Beckett beckoned one of the guards. "I think we can do without these restraints."

Theo blinked. "We can?" She was elbowed again by Isa. "I mean, we can!"

Once the cuffs had been removed, Beckett handed Isa the two compasses. "Can you tell them apart?"

She gave him an incredulous look. "No."

"You haven't even tried," Theo whined.

"Dude, they're _exactly the same_."

"You can do anything you set your mind to Isa! Have faith!"

Isa grumbled irritably, "Fine." She closed her eyes as she held the compasses lightly, looking for any sort of familiar feeling from either of them. After a moment she opened her eyes and held up her right hand. "This is yours."

For a moment she was afraid Beckett's eyebrows would fly off his face and then give a shocked gasp, he looked so surprised. Theo was also pretty shocked. "Woah. I wasn't expecting you to _actually_ be able-" She stopped. "I mean, I TOTALLY KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!"

Isa rolled her eyes, then held the compass out for Beckett to take. "Did I pass?"

"Indeed you did."

"Wait, how did _you_ know which was which?"

"I do remember which of the compasses I took from my desk."

"Oh," Theo blinked. "Right."

"I take it then, that you are not aware of the compass' purpose?" The girls shook their heads. He opened the lid and watched the needle for a moment, speaking as if to himself. "It points to the thing you desire most in the world."

"...the thing you desire most in the world?"

"Yes."

"So like, if I wanted a hotdog..."

"I'm pretty sure that's not what he means, Theo."

"What if I really, really, really wanted it?"

"More than anything else in the _entire_ world?"

Theo pondered for a moment. "Well, I could probably do with a drink too."

Isa hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. Beckett, who had been watching the small exchange curiously, put the compass on his desk. "I have a proposition for you both."

Theo quirked an eyebrow. "Isa will be glad to hear tha- OW!" She was cut off by Isa's hand making contact with the back of her head. She pouted, sulkily, rubbing her head. "That hurt."

"Good."

He walked to the door and held it open. "I'd like for you to accompany me, if you will."

The girls shrugged, then followed him out the door. None of the guards followed them, not that it was necessary since there were officer-soldier guys all over the place anyway. Isa didn't really know why there was so much military presence there, it certainly didn't seem like the town really needed it; it looked like quite a lovely place to live from the glimpses she caught as they were led from the room they woke up in to the cells.

He led them to a room that was empty except for a table in the center of it, on which there was a small-ish chest. There was a lock on the front in the shape of a heart and a key was jutting out of it. The girls glanced out the nearest window and saw a courtyard where a platform stood, above which there were seven nooses swinging in the light breeze. Isa felt a faint shiver, quite sure it wasn't because of the cold.

"Soon, there'll be pirates hanging from those," he said in a low voice. "Pirates will soon be a breed on the verge of extinction." Upon seeing the girls' questioning looks, he walked to the chest and stood beside it. "Are you familiar with the legend of Davy Jones?"

"Err, no."

"Oh. Well, he's said to be 'the devil of the seas' and captain of the most feared ship in nautical lore; the Flying Dutchman. Legend has it that he removed his heart and placed it in a chest, hidden away from the world. Whoever owns that heart owns Davy Jones and thus, owns the seas." He glanced at the girls.

Isaviel stared. "Are you saying that this is all... true?"

"Yes, I am."

Theo laughed loudly, slapping her thigh before wiping a tear away. "Oh, god, that's a good one, Becks. Great."

Beckett opened the chest and the slow, rhythmic thumping silenced Theo immediately. The girls approached the chest, tentatively, getting just close enough to be able to see over the edge. Inside was a heart. A _beating_ heart, no less. The girls stared, open-mouthed as Beckett watched them with smug satisfaction.

Theo grimaced. "That's all different shades of wrong. How is it still even _working_?"

"So, you 'own' the seas, then."

"Naturally," Beckett said with a certain degree of satisfaction. "Now, on to my proposition. I want you two to work for me, infiltrate any and all pirate crews you come across and report back to myself or Mr Mercer."

Theo narrowed her eyes. "Well, what's in it for us?"

"It's quite simple," he said, matter-of-factly. "You have a choice; you can either join me, or..." He glanced out of the window. "You can join _them_."

Well, _that_ was a no-brainer if ever they'd heard one.

* * *

**The girls get into the pirate swing pretty soon! Glee! **

**;D Reviews will feed me. OM NOM NOM.**


	4. Breathe Me

**A/N:** No, I don't actually know how Davy Jones killed the Kraken. I'm just taking a guess here. -shrug- XD Also, from here on in I'll be using song titles for chapter titles. Mainly because I'm a lazy cow. XD

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Four: Breathe Me**

**I. **

Isa was mildly surprised to find that she wasn't suffering from any form of sea-sickness, since the last time she'd taken a voyage out to sea on the ferry from Dover to Calais she'd been as sick as a dog. Upon agreeing to Lord Beckett's proposition the girls were led to the port where they'd boarded a ship called the Endeavour. It was incredible and totally unlike anything they had ever experienced 'back home' where everything was all jet-powered and shiny metal. Isa couldn't help but be awed by the grandeur of it all. Strangely both girls were enjoying the trip on the ship and had spent the hour since they had been taken on board up on the deck, taking in the view and breathing in the fresh salty air. It wasn't a particularly bad way to travel, really.

"I guess this sort of means we might be pirates," Theo whispered after her expedition around the ship, crawling into every nook and cranny to 'get a feel for the ship', in her words. Though Isa had a feeling she'd gone looking for objects that may have fallen out of pockets.

"The possibility is growing," she replied. "Though we seem to be taking this all quite well."

"What else can we do? Scream about how we're from the future? Yeah, I can see that going down really well," Theo muttered, inspecting a coin she'd found.

"Fair point. Still, at least Beckett seemed to believe me about my dream."

"Yeah, that was a little weird." Theo dropped the coin into her pocket. "Hey well, we just have to take things as they come, right? That's how we roll." She held up her fist, and Isa replied by holding up her own so they could touch knuckles.

"Word."

"Excuse me."

"Yo," Theo replied, turning her head to see who was speaking.

Taking the strange greeting as a sign to continue the officer did so, "Lord Beckett would like to see you."

"Alright, thanks." Isa began making her way to the cabin but noticed Theo hadn't moved from her position at the railing. "You coming?"

"I'll join you in a bit," she said, having taken out another trinket she'd found on her travels. "You can fill me in on whatever he says if I miss anything, right?" Before waiting for a reply she scurried off in the other direction, ducking and weaving between the other officers on the ship. Isaviel rolled her eyes as she continued on her own way, wondering if the people she came across would all be as careful with the contents of their pockets as they should.

As it turned out, Lord Beckett apparently only wanted them to join him for a spot of tea, which suited Isa just fine since she'd missed having a brew every now and then. She was offered a seat at a dainty little table upon which were some cups and saucers and a three tiered tray with cakes and biscuits.

_Theo's_so_ going to regret not coming with,_ Isaviel mused with a wry smile.

Beckett allowed her to get comfortable before saying anything. "Where is Miss Runkle?"

"She's still getting to know the ship." Well. It was true to a certain extent. Her new drinking-buddy raised an eyebrow though he didn't press for any further explanation; he seemed more interested in his tea. He poured her a cup of the hot liquid before offering her some milk and sugar which were both gratefully accepted.

They spent a long but pleasant while just enjoying the brew. It was Isaviel that decided to break the silence, curiosity over-riding any feeling of comfort she had.

"May I ask where we're headed?"

He set his teacup down gently. "We're going to the Flying Dutchman."

Well, that explained why the heart was on the ship, too. "What for?" Stupid question, Isa. Really.

"Davy Jones doesn't seem to realise his current predicament, so we're going to make things a little clearer for him." He took another sip. "I'm going to have him dispose of his pet."

"...pet? Like a dog?"

"He calls it the Kraken. It's a large beast that's said to send those it devours to Davy Jones' Locker." Beckett stood up and walked over to the cabin's window, teacup and saucer in hand. "He will have no use for it since any and all pirates will be dealt with by us."

Isa said nothing, opting to stare into her cup of tea as she quietly sipped away. He sounded... excited. She didn't know the man very well, but it was patently obvious to her that he wasn't a fan of pirates. It made her wonder if they'd done the right thing, would any self-respecting pirate make a deal with someone who hates them, and who could turn around and betray them at any moment once their usefulness had passed? Then again, being a pirate would imply that one would take the route that would be most beneficial to them at the time, and this happened to be it.

She gave a light shrug and set her cup down, deciding that she shouldn't think too deeply into things just yet. Not until he gave some sort of sign that he _was_ going to betray them. "What'll happen to the pirates you catch?"

"They'll be interrogated in order for us to catch as many of them as possible. Then, they will be sentenced and hanged."

"So you want us to help you send them and more of them to their deaths."

"Absolutely." He smiled, as if this was the most natural thing in the world. "It's either that or be among the first to be sentenced, to set an example, if you will."

"Well, when you put it like that..."

Beckett turned away from the window and walked towards the door with his tea. "Join me, would you?"

Isa got up and followed him back out onto the deck. The waters were calm and stoic, reflecting the bright rays from the sun that hung high up in the perfect blue sky. Just as she was about to question why he'd asked her up there the waters right beside the ship exploded, spraying up and out as something burst from below the water's surface; it was a ship. Last time she checked, ships didn't sail UNDER the sea.

She grabbed the sleeve of Beckett's coat, and the cup and saucer he was holding gave a small rattle though he paid no heed and kept watching as the ship fully emerged and floating alongside the Endeavour. Isa would have let go, but the shock of seeing a _ship_ come out of the _ocean_ caused her brain to seize up and refuse to work, and thus, made her continue to cling.

"This," he said, handing his cup and saucer to the nearest officer, "Is the Flying Dutchman."

**II.**

Theoli had been up on deck when the Dutchman surfaced, and had joined Isa and Beckett (plus officers, obviously) as they boarded the strange ship. By all intents and purposes it looked like if you set one foot on it, said foot would go right through the wood, and Isa breathed a short sigh of relief when she realised it was perfectly capable of holding weight up.

She thought a ship coming out of the sea was shocking? She hadn't seen the worst until she'd seen the captain and crew of the Dutchman. The girls stood there, jaws slack and eyes wide, staring at a man who had the limbs of a crab and face that looked like something out of a very bad hentai film. His crew seemed to be made up of various sea-creatures, each as bizarre as the next.

Theo was horrified. "Are those _real_?" After a kick to the shin courtesy of Isa, "I mean, wow. Having tentacles for a face must be really rough. What moisturizer do you use?"

"Who are they?" Davy Jones demanded angrily in a thick, Scottish accent, showering everyone who was unfortunate enough to be nearby when he spoke.

"Dude," Theo muttered, wiping her face with her sleeve. "Say it, don't spray it."

Isa had to bite her lip to stop herself laughing. Something told her Jones wasn't the type that took things with a pinch of salt. Or, you know, the type to laugh. Ever. "I'm Isaviel Gale and this is Theoli Runkle," she replied, giving what she hoped was a courteous nod.

The Captain gave a grumble before turning to Beckett. "What are you doing on my ship?"

"_Your_ ship?"

"Last I checked,_ I_ was still captain."

"Yes, only because we allowed you to remain captain. Be under no illusion, this ship belongs to the crown now," Beckett said, voice not lacking in arrogance. "I see, however, that you still cling to the notion that you can sail as free as you like."

He glanced over his shoulder at the chest, held by two unassuming officers. Jones twitched, knowing full well what was inside it and seemingly not wanting it anywhere within 5 miles of him or 'his' ship. Isa, getting the feeling that Jones wouldn't take to this very well, moved her hand to her sword almost instinctively.

Beckett either didn't notice, or didn't care, because he pressed on. "Now, I was under the assumption that this was a done deal. We keep this_ safe_, and in return you will sail under my command."

"I don't remember making any such deal," Jones spat, literally. Luckily Theo had dodged this time.

"Really? Well let me re-iterate for those of you with the memory of a_ barnacle_; you are to do what I tell you, when I tell you to do it." He glanced at the chest. "Unless you need me to give you some further reason to comply, of course."

Incensed, Jones drew his sword and stepped forward to swing the blade at the Lord, not hesitating to kill the man. Luckily Isa was well on the ball and drew her own cutlass far before any of the officers knew what was going on, quickly lifting it high enough to stop Jones' blade in it's tracks. Beckett raised an eyebrow at the blades hovering inches from his face.

She tilted her head. "That was a little rude."

"You betray who you are for _him_?"

"Oh, that's rich," Beckett interjected. "You're the last person who should be giving lectures on 'betrayal of who one is'."

Jones said nothing, though his anger was still evident. After a moment he lowered his sword, though didn't sheath it, so Isa did the same and held her cutlass at her side should the need for it arise again. The whole ordeal was beginning to get very tense, and Isa hoped Beckett was either going to stop making things worse, or get one over on him. This lot didn't look a particularly friendly bunch.

"What do you want?"

Beckett smiled. "This... Kraken, of yours," he began, walking over to the edge of the deck. "I want you to kill it."

There were angry murmurs and mutterings from the Dutchman's crew but nothing from the captain himself. For a short moment Isa could have sworn she saw something akin to sadness or regret in his eyes but as quickly as it had appeared it was gone, replaced with his normal cold, cruel stare. He span on his leg to face his crew, though his silence continued.

Beckett sighed. "You have an hour." He then signalled for his crew to leave.

Theo tugged on Isa's sleeve. "We'd better go too."

She gave a murmured response but followed her friend off the Dutchman. Davy Jones certainly seemed like an interesting guy.

**III. **

"Hey, check this out."

Theo looked up, "What is it?" Her speech was very muffled, since she'd just shoved a cake into her mouth in one go. The pair had gone back into the cabin to leave Beckett to his business. Where Theo had made a beeline straight for the tea and nibbles, Isa had gone to the bookcase to find some information on the Dutchman.

Ignoring the fact that Theo was trying to choke herself with cakes, Isa thrust an old, tatty book under her nose. "It's about Davy Jones. Read it." She took the book back when Theo held up her hands, which were covered in cake. "Okay, I'll give you the abridged version. So believe it or not, Davy Jones used to not be so tentacle-y. Originally, his job was to ferry those that died at sea to the after-life-"

"Like a bus service," Theo nodded.

"Um, yeah. We'll go with that. So anyway, he got this job which meant that for ten years he would ferry souls to the afterlife, during which time he couldn't set foot on land. After the ten years he'd get a day off-"

"A day. After _ten years_?!"

"Oh, that's not even the worst part," Isa said, shaking her head. "The one day he gets to spend with his beloved? She apparently doesn't show up, so he goes all loco, cuts out his heart, throws it in a tin box and buries it on some island somewhere, I quote, 'never to be unearthed again'."

"Well, that worked."

"I know, right?"

"Jeez," Theo muttered, nibbling on another cake. "Talk about taking a break-up badly."

"Seriously. So like, it's said that the only way to kill Jonesy-boy would be to stab his heart, but get this; the person who stabs the heart? Their heart has to replace it and then they become the captain. Something about the Dutchman needing a captain to exist or something."

"No way." Theo pondered for a moment. "I wonder what would happen if the captain of the Dutchman stabbed his own heart."

Isa shrugged. "It'd be like dividing by zero. Time paradox."

"Obviously. Anything about this Kraken thinger?"

"Yeah. The Kraken is some huge-ass 'cephalopod-like beast' with tentacles and some great big teeth. It chases after people with the black spot, some mark that the crew of the Dutchman administer, and only the captain can remove. So it gobbles on ships to get to the marked person who is sent to Davy Jones' Locker, where he has to suffer his worst nightmare for all eternity. Any survivors from the attack are then given the chance to not die by joining the crew. Like that's a great choice; 'die, or join my crew, we have a great pension scheme!'"

Theo nearly snorted her cake and Isa had to hit her on the back until she managed to breathe normally again. "So," she eventually said. "With the Kraken gone, Beckett can continue on without worrying about any squidmonsters."

"Exactly. That also means he'd have more control over Jones' actions"

"Shrewd," Theo said, approvingly.

"Doesn't say anything about where the Kraken lives or how he gets out in the open to do his bidding, though."

"Maybe he throws some fish-food over the side of the ship and waits?"

"I... don't think so, Theo. It eats ships whole. Fish food probably won't cut it."

"Aw."

There was a sudden, thunderous boom that reverberated through the ship, causing everything in the room to shudder and shake. The cake in Theo's hand was knocked from her grasp, much to her horror and woe, but before she could mourn, Isa had grabbed her by the coat and dragged her out onto deck to see what the heck had just happened. It wasn't long before she got her answer.

There was an explosion on the water not far from the ships, out of which enormous tentacles shot out, grasping at air. The foam and spray meant that they couldn't see any more of the creature but what they saw was more than enough. Isa stole a glance at the Dutchman and its captain, stood at the helm and staring out at the Kraken.

She heard Jones' order to fire the cannons.


	5. Internal Conflict

**A/N:** It just occurred to me that I've made a bit of a booboo in previous chapters concerning the compass. This will be smoothly glossed over by the fact that I will twist canon like a filthy wench and say that Jack DID NOT have his compass at the Locker. XD I apologise for this epic level of fail on my part. The dream sequences, I'll eventually either just reference them or have Isa explain them when she wakes up if they get too ridiculously pretentious and-or pointless.

Last note; the girls encounter the rest of the pirate crew in the next chapter! I promise. ;D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End  
****Chapter Five: Internal Conflict **

**I. **

Over the weeks that followed the girls were kept busy with their new jobs as moles, charged with the duty of trying to find out as much information as they can about pirates that had gone into hiding in some way or another. Lord Beckett, with the help of a reluctant Davy Jones, was able to sweep across the oceans and take into custody any pirates that were still sailing the ocean, even trying to launch some sort of counter offensive which would eventually fail. The girls tried not to think about the consequences of their actions, just that they were doing what needed to be done at the time; nobody could begrudge them that, could they?

Isa knew full well that they could, and quite honestly she didn't blame them. Yet the fact remained that as long as Beckett had a use for them they would continue to do his bidding. Theo had grown more and more disillusioned by the whole idea the more pirates they managed to get arrested, and Isa knew she was feeling as uncomfortable with the whole thing as she was. They'd talked about it, but had come to the conclusion that at that moment in time there wasn't much they could do. It wasn't like they could ask Beckett nicely to stop from obliterating all pirates. Well, they could, it'd just be a really stupid thing to do.

It was also getting to be pretty annoying to be arrested at least once a day, as if the bloody naval officers didn't have a memory for faces or something. This led to them finding the perfect escape spot on the roof of the building where they spent most of the time they had to themselves, mainly because it was the only place to run to when they're being chased through the hall.

"How many times is it now?"

"Seven," Isa replied, trying to catch her breath. "I'm sure they do it just to take the piss."

Theo grumbled, "And they say us Brits have no sense of humour."

"We're not exactly amused, are we?"

"Nobody likes being the butt of a joke. I'm sure this is all Mercer's doing. That man is an infuriating git, sometimes."

"'Sometimes'?"

"Yeah, you're right, he's just a git. Smarmy, up himself, want-to-repeatedly-punch-him-in-the-face git." She sighed. "What are we doing?"

"Staying on the right side of Lord Beckett."

"Are we doing the _right thing_, though?"

Isa sighed, looking down and seeing the platforms above with the numerous hangman's nooses were placed. The first set of hangings were scheduled to take place in two days' time if Beckett was able to over rule the rights to counsel and to fair trial before hanging. Apparently that took far too long, and Beckett wasn't as patient as he'd made himself out to be.

"Honestly, I don't know. I can see it from Beckett's point of view, though."

Theo blinked. "You can?"

"Sure. He wants the East India Trading Company to do well and without pirates to foil his well thought out plans not only can he do so without much hassle, he can 'own' the seas too."

"I guess it makes sense if you're an evil sonofabitch."

Isa snorted. "We're just doing something that someone else would have done anyway."

Theo nodded, but the girls knew that sounded weak. Although Theo was gradually starting to side more with the pirates, Isa found herself wanting more and more to belong right where she was, having a solid purpose somewhere that didn't involve pillaging and plundering. She wouldn't voice said feelings though, not even to her closest friend.

"Besides, we've got a place to stay and immunity for now until we work out how exactly to get home."

"Which we have no ideas on," Theo added, unhelpfully. "Then there's your crack-ass dream from before. Doesn't seem to have been any news on that lately."

Isa shrugged. "No, maybe it was just a freakish dream."

"Brought on by the stress of the situation," Theo agreed. "It's not really surprising."

"No..." Isa couldn't ignore the feeling that the dream wasn't just a figment of her well-tuned imagination. How did she know about Sao Feng and Barbossa? How did she know he was a pirate lord? How did she know he had a beard? All mysterious questions that remained unanswered for now. One thing for the 'crazy dream' theory was that she hadn't had another since that first one, for which she was thankful; the last one made her want to be sick.

"Welp, we'd better go find Beckett and give him our update report."

"You go," Theo said, looking over the edge of the roof with a glimmer in her eye. "I have some pockets to pick." She blinked when she saw Isa staring. "What?"

"You're picking pockets."

"Yes. Yes I am."

"Of the naval officers?"

"Yes. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, I dunno, maybe because you're probably the reason they keep _chasing_ us all the time?"

Theo opened her mouth to protest, then stopped and thought about it. After a moment she closed her eyes and gave a sheepish grin. "Oopsies?"

"Damn you and your pirate tendencies, Theo." She tried to keep a straight face but ended up breaking out into a grin.

Theo gave her a thumbs up before preparing for her getaway. "See ya later, alligator."

"In a while, crocodile," Isa replied, waving as the other fled from the scene. Once she was out of sight, Isa climbed down and made her way towards Beckett's office.

**II. **

"So there's nothing much to report, sir. We're both pretty confident there are no more pirates in Port Royal, at least. Mercer's chasing after the ones that managed to slip out and into the next town." Isaviel set her teacup down onto its saucer as she spoke. Every couple of days, the girls were to report to Beckett about the progress of their job, especially if Mercer was out and about doing follow-up work.

Every time they visited, they were offered tea. Theo once commented that if he cut himself, Beckett would probably bleed tea, something the Lord had taken with a wry smile. Unfortunately Theo had taken that to mean there was something in her theory and had hatched a couple of plans to get him to cut himself, until Isa managed to distract her with a shiny object.

Honestly, Isa appreciated the moment of calm within her mostly hectic days running after pirates, running _from_ pirates and also running from the officers that Theo had pilfered from. After the initial report, Theo would normally dash off for a while, at which point Beckett would invite the girl left behind to continue having tea with him. It had been a little bizarre to her at first considering she was, to all intents and purposes, a pirate, but she went with it not wanting to offend. It had been surprising that she enjoyed his company, even though they didn't really speak much apart from small talk which was mostly on Isa's part.

She quite often found herself stealing the odd glance in his direction as she sipped her tea, wondering what he was thinking of when they sat together with nothing but silence between them. Apparently this was the moment she'd find out.

"What do you think will happen to you after your usefulness has come to an end?"

Okay, granted, that wasn't a particularly positive start to a conversation but she'd take what she could get.

She shrugged. "I suppose we'd have to run pretty swiftly."

He quirked an eyebrow as he looked her way. "Run?"

"Well, what, you expect us to graciously accept our fate of death? No thank you." She set her teacup down, knowing the grim smile on her lips did little to hide the worry the question had stirred up within her. She reached for the teapot in the center of the table, only to have Beckett place his hand over hers when she gripped the handle.

"What if you were offered the chance to redeem your past... misdemeanours. The chance to be rid of the 'pirate', if you will."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you making such an offer?"

He broke eye contact for a moment as his lips curved into a slight smile. When he looked back at her he gave her an inquisitive look. "You'd decline?"

"I never said that..." Isa chewed on her lip. "I just won't speak for Theo when she's not here."

"I see."

After some hesitation he took his hand from hers, much to Isa's regret; she was beginning to like the feeling of his hand over hers. The realisation of her train of thought caused her cheeks to flush as she uttered a choked gurgle, very badly masking it with a cough. Beckett gave her a strange look, but didn't question.

"Well, do give your replies when you decide."

"No time limit?" She smiled.

He smirked. "Not for now."

Isaviel poured herself another cup of tea, topping up Beckett's cup as she went and they continued with their usual silence, disrupted only by the clink of china hitting china when either of them set their cups down again.

Out of absolutely nowhere, a migraine decided to bitchsmack Isa upside the head, causing a sudden dizzy spell that nearly had her out of the chair and on the floor. She closed her eyes, mainly because the light was hurting them but also because she felt so sick seeing anything moving might send her over the edge, not to mention the fact that the ringing in her ears was causing her vision to blur. She recognised the familiar feeling almost immediately and almost swore at it. Loudly.

There was a knock at the door, thankfully drawing attention away from herself. Isa didn't look - she couldn't move without having to fight the urge to hurl - so she listened to what little of the conversation she could before the ringing in her ears grew deafeningly loud.

"Lord Beckett, you wanted to speak to me?"

"Ah yes. There's someone you should be acquainted with-"

Everything suddenly became muffled and muted, like she had a helmet covering her head. She felt the strength leave her body and then she was falling, passed out cold before she even hit the floor.

**III. **

_Well, she was back in Singapore. Fantastic. She had to find out if there was a way to stop these 'visions' or 'dreams' or whatever they were, because quite frankly, they're getting to be a right pain in the butt. _

_She was back in the room watching Sao Feng, Barbossa, and the as yet unnamed man in the bucket and the woman she had heard referred to as Elizabeth. It looked as if she was just continuing with her last trip, returning as Sao Feng was demanding to know what the troupe wanted with the charts before answering his own questions. _

_"You intend to attempt the voyage to Davy Jones' Locker, but I cannot help but wonder..." He turned to face them. "Why?"_

_Barbossa threw a coin, which Sao Feng caught and, after a light blow, held near to his ear._

_"The song has been sung," Barbossa said, stepping forward. "The time is upon us. We must convene the Brethren Court. As one of the nine pirate lords, ye must honour the call..." _

_Sao Feng grimaced, holding the coin tightly in his hand. "More steam." _

_Nothing happened. _

_He turned to the woman beside him and screamed, "More steam!" Finally, when the room began to fill with warm mist, he continued. "There is a price on all our heads, it is true, and the only way a pirate can turn a profit anymore, is by betraying other pirates..."_

_Isa winced, momentarily losing focus on the conversation before her whilst she thought of her own guilt in that department. The mention of Beckett turned her attention back to the goings on around her. _

_"Against the East India Trading Company, what value is the Brethren Court? What can any of us do?"_

_"You can _fight_!" The woman stalked forwards, angrily, shrugging off the man attempting to restrain her. "Get off me!" She turned back to Sao Feng. "You are Sao Feng, the pirate lord of Singapore..."_

_Isa lost interest in her speech, willing someone to get back to anything relevant. _

_"Elizabeth Swann," Sao Feng said, circling her. "There is more to you than meets the eye, isn't there."_

No shit,_ Isa thought with a roll of her eyes. Then cursed herself for missing another chunk of conversation. She's not very good at the whole attention thing, really._

_"But I cannot help but notice, you," he pointed to Barbossa, "Have failed to answer my question. What is it you seek in Davy Jones' Locker?"_

_Bucket-guy piped up, "Jack Sparrow. He's one of the pirate lords."_

_Isa was confused at the reaction to the new name; Barbossa seemed to regret it being mentioned and Sao Feng? He just looked livid. _Jack who- woah.

_In a blink, found herself in a totally different place altogether. She grumbled in frustration before ducking into the shadows as two figures came nearby. Outside lights flashed and the sounds of shouting and gunfire raged, punctuated by the occasional explosion. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Mercer ducking behind some crates, at first aiming with his pistol but then deciding to listen into the conversation. Sao Feng had the guy from the bucket pinned against the wall._

_"What a coincidence that the East India Trading Company finds me the day you show up in Singapore..."_

_"It is coincidence only," he replied, pushing away and holding his knife against the other's throat. "If you want to make a deal with Beckett, you need what I offer."_

_"__You crossed Barbossa, you were willing to cross Jack Sparrow; why should I expect any better?"_

_"I need the Black Pearl to free my father; you're helping me to get it.__"_

**IV.**

She took a deep, gasping breath as she felt herself return to consciousness. Once the room stopped spinning and the nausea lessened she opened her eyes, taking a moment to try and recall where she was meant to be. Oh yes, the floor of Beckett's office. It was a little while more before she noticed she was clinging to someone's arm, someone who she didn't recognise immediately; a rather lovely looking green-eyed vision looking at her with mild concern. Behind him was Theo, looking even more worried.

"Dude, you alright?"

She gave a weak grin. "Five by five."

The guy whose name she didn't yet know helped her to sit up and promptly offered her a steadying hand when she began to sway a little. Once she got her bearings together she got to her feet and set herself back in her chair, feeling the dizziness ebb away.

Beckett was stood beside Theoli, looking mildly troubled. "Back with us, are we?"

"Yeah, dream again," she muttered, massaging her temples.

"What about, this time?" He poured her some tea, knowing her tea-drinking habits well enough to know she takes hers with both milk and sugar. We all know that tea fixes everything.

"I don't... I didn't really understand much." Her shaking hand caused the cup to clatter against the saucer. Thinking better of holding a cup of hot liquid in her shaking hands, she put the cup back down.

Theo dragged a chair over and sat beside her. "Where were you? Singapore again?"

She nodded. "Same place. It's like it sort of picked up where the last one left off..." She glanced up and noted the look of confusion on the stranger's face. "Apparently I'm psychic," she explained. "Either that or really, really crazy."

"We're sort of torn between the two," Theo snickered. "Who's the hot guy, by the way?"

Isa shrugged and looked at Beckett.

"Oh yes, introductions," he said. He motioned to the man with his cup of tea. "This is Admiral Norrington. He's the man who brought me the heart and the compass."

"Apparently he also brought sexy back," Theo muttered, more to herself than to anyone else, adding a 'rawr' at the end.

"...he brought- Wait, what?"

"It's a very, very long story," Norrington said, "Involving a great deal of hassle and pirates."

Isa quirked an eyebrow. "A story so long we don't have time for it?"

"Oh, I'll always have time for you," Theo sighed, and Isa had to elbow her.

"Well," Norrington said, unnerved by the way Theo was staring at him. "It's nothing impressive-"

Beckett interrupted, "Nonsense. You managed to get the heart of Davy Jones without _dying_, I do believe that qualifies under the subject of 'impressive'."

Isa was curious to note that Norrington looked uncomfortable with the praise that he got, and wondered why he wouldn't lap it up after having gone to what was sounding like considerable trouble to get the objects for Beckett. His current position was no doubt gained by his actions, but he didn't really seem all too thrilled about being there.

She was also thankful that attention had been drawn away from her latest dream. So she was keeping mum about the information she'd just heard but it wasn't against the law the last time she checked. Something told her keeping it to herself would serve her better in the long run anyway, especially until she found out what exactly it is that she knew.

Her thoughts were stopped in their tracks when she noticed Theoli holding what looked like a neatly folded uniform. "...what is that?"

"Oh! Becki told me about that offer and I said I was totally going for it. I mean, dude, look at the sex that oozes off this uniform." She held it in front of her, eyes practically glittering with joy. "How could I say no to this baby?"

"So you accepted an offer based on the hotness of the uniform?"

Theo held the uniform up for Isa to look at.

"...yeah, I'm sold."

Norrington, probably more than a little scared of the girls, turned to Beckett. "If there's nothing else, I shall take my leave." After a sharp nod from Beckett, he left, only to pass Mercer who was on his way in.

"Lord Beckett," he began, "We've found Sao Feng and his band of invalids."

Isa glanced at Theo, although the latter was too busy stroking her new uniform to actually care. Shrugging, Isa turned her attention back to the conversation.

"Oh, good," Beckett said, jovially. "Where did you find them?"

"Singapore," came the reply. Mercer stared at Isa in an accusatory manner. What he wanted to accuse her of, she didn't know, since it was her that told the bugger to look into Singapore in the first place. Arse.

"Really? That _is_ interesting." He glanced at Isaviel. "Very interesting, indeed."

"It took a while, but we managed to find someone who can tell us his current location, sir. With your permission I'd like to take some officers to Singapore and weed him out of his hiding place."

Beckett nodded, still looking at Isaviel. "You can leave those uniforms here," he said to her, at which Theo let out a woeful whimper. Ignoring this, he continued. "You will go with Mr Mercer to Singapore."

All three responded simultaneously, "What?"

"All of you are going to Singapore. In case some of them slip through the net, so to speak."

"That won't happen, sir," Mercer protested, clearly offended at the notion.

"No? Need I remind you about the last few times you've stormed some pirate hold-out?"

Mercer twitched. Isa thought back to one of the incidents Beckett was talking about. A group of pirates were found to be hiding out in a small town, pretending to be members of the community in order to escape suspicion. Mercer had decided that the best way to go about things was to just bust into the place with a bunch of marines and just hope for the best. Not surprisingly a fair few pirates managed to slip away in the chaos which meant that Isa and Theo had been drafted in to find out where they'd gone, and then launch a ninja-attack on them, making sure that this time, there was no way for them to sneak out.

If Mercer didn't hate them so blatantly, Theo may not have bothered ribbing him about it every time they crossed paths, whistling the victory theme from Final Fantasy after having adopted it as 'their theme of badass and awesome'. Isa went along with it, mainly because poking fun at Mercer was far too enjoyable.

"I thought not." Beckett stood up and walked over to the window where he kept the compasses, in separate boxes so that he wouldn't confuse the two. Isa had insisted that mixing them up would only bring about some bad juju, and nobody wanted any bad juju being brought. He took the girls' compass and handed it to Isa. "You may need this."

"What? Why?"

"It's a useful object to have."

Isaviel shrugged. "Fair enough..." Curious about what he had said was the purpose of the compass she opened it and took a peek at the arrow as it span round and round, gradually coming to a stop, pointing at...

She snapped the compass closed, eyes wide with surprise.

"Did it stop?"

"Uh, no," she lied, attaching the compass to her belt. "Kept spinning. I guess I don't know what I want."

With that, she made a hasty exit, dragging Theo out as she wailed tearful goodbyes to the uniforms on the table top. Once the door had closed Beckett took out the other compass, watching it in silence as he continued to sip his tea.

* * *

**So, the girls are going to Singapore! Finally they're going to meet the other pirates!  
O: Expect them to mess canon to the nth degree. ;D XD**

**Reviews would be loved and appreciated.  
**


	6. Horribly Clichéd

**A/N:** So updates may get slower for a while whilst I try and decide wtf to do with my life. :/ It sucks having no real direction to speak of.

Also if you're still reading, **need-2-know-basis** (or shay piratess?): thanks for the review, but it's MEANT to be clichéd; it's a _parody_... you know, where people make fun of something on purpose-like? XD This isn't some attempt at a serious fic or anything. It even says so in the summary. Just letting you know. ;D

However, I'm not really counting on the fact that you're reading this. XD OH WELL.

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Six: Horribly Clichéd**

**I. **

"Next time I see Mercer I am SO kicking him in the 'nads," Theo hissed as the girls ducked behind a nearby crate just as an officer took aim and fired at them, "So hard that he's going to have to go through puberty again."

Despite the girls' protests and advice Mercer had gone ahead and _invaded_ the place where Isa said that the pirate lord of Singapore was currently hiding. As if that didn't make him a big enough arse already, he had then _neglected_ to tell the officers _not_ to shoot the girls, who were not surprisingly assumed to be part of the group of pirates they were hunting down. Luckily the girls had managed to duck and weave among the chaos and avoid getting injured, aided by the fact that Isa vaguely recognised where they were running to.

"Where are we going, anyway?"

Isa glanced around and spotted what she was searching for; the small secluded area from her last vision where she had seen Sao Feng and the man who Mercer told them was called William Turner. At least the sour bint was useful for something, eh?

"There," Isa said, pointing to their new target.

Theo looked, then took a deep breath as they dashed forward, pushing the odd officer and pirate into the waters below them as they went. Once they got to their destination they, once again, hid behind a crate, covering their ears as an explosion sounded somewhere nearby.

"Listen," Isa began, glancing around to make sure nobody was there just yet. "Mercer's going to be coming here in like, 5 minutes. He's going to stumble across Sao Feng and the bucket-gu- I mean, Turner. Sao Feng leaves, then Mercer buggers off. Then we corner Turner."

"Why?"

"We're going with them on their little escapade."

Theo's eyes lit up. "You mean we're going on an adventure?!"

Isa rolled her eyes, then pulled Theo further into the shadows when Mercer appeared, gun in hand. He ducked behind a crate upon seeing Sao Feng and Turner burst in, holding his gun steady and aimed right at them. Sao Feng was holding a sword to the Turner's throat. "What a coincidence that the East India Trading Company finds me the day you show up in Singapore..."

"It is coincidence only," he replied, getting out his knife to hold against the other's throat. "If you want to make a deal with Beckett, you need what I offer."

Theo twitched when she saw Mercer move, but held her position after Isa grabbed her arm and shook her head lightly. As much as Theo wanted to kick Mercer into touch she knew when to trust Isa's judgement, especially in situations like these which required clear thinking.

"You crossed Barbossa, you were willing to cross Jack Sparrow; why should I expect any better?"

"I need the Black Pearl to free my father; you're helping me to get it."

After a while of uncertainty, the two parted and Sao Feng fled. Isa waited for Mercer to also leave, then stood up before Will had a chance to do the same. "William Turner?"

He whirled around, holding his sword in front of him as he searched for the owner of the voice. Upon seeing the girls his eyes narrowed but he didn't make any move to lower his weapons. "Who wants to know?"

"Isaviel Gale," she nodded to Theo. "Theoli Runkle. We want a word."

"I'm slightly busy at the moment."

Theo shrugged, "Yeah, wanting to save your father, blah blah blah."

A slightly bewildered look crossed his face. "You were listening?"

"Indeed we were," Isa said, pleasantly enough. She stepped towards him, hands raised in an effort to try to look as unthreatening as she could.

"What do you want?"

"You to take us with you."

"Why would I do that?"

Isa tilted her head. "Would you want your companions knowing just how devious you really are?"

Theo tutted and shook her head. Will seemed to consider his options as the fire fight raged on outside, oblivious to the devious underhandedness going on just alongside them. The occasional shout from someone who was closer to them than she liked caused Isa to glance nervously towards the general direction of the noise but they went on undisturbed. Eventually Will lowered his sword and gave them a questioning look. "Why?"

"We all have our reasons."

"You know my reasons," Will said, finally lowering his weapon. "What of yours?"

"We're fans of adventure," she replied. "You have no reason to trust us, I know."

"Looks like we have something in common then," Will replied, smiling slightly. "Fine, we have an accord for now."

Theo clapped. "Awesome!" She shrank back slightly upon seeing the looks she got from Will and Isa. "...I mean... um... yay?"

The three made their way back into the foray to try and find the rest of Will's fellow pirates, finding themselves having to fight as they did so. Isa could see no sign of Mercer and assumed he'd gone crawling off under the rock he'd come out from - ooh, that was scathing - either way she didn't care as long as he was away from them.

Will suddenly stopped, causing Theo to walk into his back and Isa to walk into Theo's. "Hey, what give-"

Isa gulped when she saw what had made him stop; a shitload of Sao Feng's pirates looking right at them.

"Sao Feng sent us," a man she recognised from her visions as the leader from the dock said. "He has given you free use of one of his ships and a crew to sail with you." He narrowed his eyes at Will's apparent new companions. "Who are they?"

"Acquaintances," he replied without hesitation. "Are we going to stand around all day or shall we get going?"

After some hesitation the man turned to his crewmates and shrugged, then started to lead the way towards where the ships were docked. Luckily for them the chaos and the fighting seemed to be concentrated elsewhere, allowing them to slip away virtually unnoticed. On the way they met up with the other half of their crew.

Elizabeth stared at the girls. "Who are _they_?"

Will twitched at her tone of voice. "They-"

"Hey, hey, people." Theo put her hands on her hips. "We can stand around here chatting, or we could actually get away from the people who want to shoot us? _Then_ we can talk?" She returned the cold stare that Elizabeth was giving her until the two were given no choice but to go with the flow of people when a nearby explosion caused them to flee.

**II.**

As their newly acquired ship left Singapore behind them they could see nothing but the fires that blazed through the small town, lighting up the night sky and giving off a hot, orange glow. Isaviel grimaced, knowing that this was partly her own doing, hoping that people innocent of the whole thing had managed to escape alright. After a moment she could bear the sight no longer and crossed to the other side of the ship, standing beside a dark-skinned woman with long, dreadlocked hair and an old, tattered dress. The two remained silent until they were joined by another.

"There's no place left for Sao Feng to cower," Elizabeth said. "Do you think he will honour the call?"

"I cannot say," she muttered in a thick, Jamaican accent. "There is an evil on these seas that even the most staunchest, blood thirsty pirates have come to fear..."

Her words triggered something that caused Isaviel to shudder, feeling another one of her 'headaches' coming on. She squeezed her eyes tight shut and focused all her energy on driving the vision back, not wanting to see any more than she already had done, not wanting to know any more. She'd rather be happy and ignorant than have to bear this burden. She opened her eyes again once the headache had faded, only to find that the woman with the accent was staring at her, curiously.

"I did not catch your name."

"Isaviel Gale," she replied, mustering all the false bravado she could. "Sorry, you are...?"

"Tia Dalma."

"Nice to meet you." Isaviel held a hand out, which Tia Dalma shook, though her eyes narrowed slightly when their hands made contact.

"What business do you have on this ship?"

"Oh, you know, wanting to get away from it all, have an adventure." She wasn't about to divulge anything to a woman who could, for all Isa knew, be completely and utterly batshit. "It's not like sticking around back there would have been much fun."

"Aye," the woman's gaze returned to the waters as the ship sailed father and farther from Singapore. "That is true..."

The look on her face told Isa she wanted to be alone, so she decided to take her leave. Near the helm she could see Theo talking to Barbossa and Will and a little further away an unhappy looking Elizabeth making a beeline right for them. She could see the sparks from the other end of the ship. Elizabeth and Theo had taken an instant dislike to one another, although they'd only just met minutes earlier, so the rest of the crew were trying to keep them as far apart from one another as they could... unfortunately nobody can tell either of these women what to do.

Sighing, Isa also made her way towards the group, figuring someone would need to restrain Theo if she got riled up.

"I think it's about time you told us who you are," Elizabeth snapped.

"I don't do well answering to demands from spoiled little girls."

Isa held back from mentioning that she was probably younger than Elizabeth, but never mind. Of course, she had to back her homie all the way, but she didn't even know the other woman. A quick glance in his direction told her Will was having the same issues.

"Elizabeth, they're _just_-"

"_Just_ what?" She crossed her arms over her chest and pouted slightly. "Just WHAT?"

Theo slapped her palm to her forehead. "Christ, woman, why are you being such a ginormous pissant?"

Elizabeth probably didn't know what the word meant but looked insulted nevertheless as she stepped forward. "What did you say?"

Theo took a step forward to, getting all up in Elizabeth's face. "I said-"

Isaviel rolled her eyes, then pushed herself between the two, hands raised in a defensive manner. "Woah!" She held a hand up to each girl's face when they started to protest. "SHH! NO. BAD! Bad Theo! Bad Elizabeth!" Barbossa was looking at Isa as if she was insane and Will was just hoping it didn't make things worse. "Now, we're on a comparatively small vessel right now and there's only so many places you can go to avoid one another, so I suggest you try to remain _civil_ at the very least." She lowered her hands and placed them on her hips. "Am I going to have to throw either of you overboard?"

"No," they mumbled, looking at their feet.

Elizabeth looked up. "I'd still like to know who you are, though."

"They helped me try and find a way into the temple to get the charts," Will said.

Barbossa snorted. "Didn't help ye very much, now, did they?"

"Hey," Theo said, defensively. "We supplied the knowledge, it's not our fault he didn't utilise it properly."

"Aye, that be true enough."

"Will has some things he needs to fill us in on," Theo said, smiling.

"I do?"

"Yes, you do." She took his arm and led him away, turning and sticking her tongue out at the fuming Elizabeth, left in the company of poor Barbossa when Isa decided to flee along with them. Isa was sure he'd dealt with far scarier stuff than her... hopefully.

"What do I need to fill you in on?"

"Jack Sparrow?"

"Where we're actually going?" Isa added.

Theo nodded. "How long it's going to take?"

Will quirked an eyebrow. "You agreed to come along without knowing any of the details?"

Theo pouted. "Adventure."

"This is life or death."

"No, I hadn't noticed for all the friendly hugging that was going on in Singapore." Theo gave him an incredulous stare. "Quit the lectures and just tell us how it is."

Will sighed. "We're heading for World's End-"

"Like, the actual end of the world?"

Isa snorted. "Oh, come on Theo, we know that the world doesn't have an _end_."

"Well, either way, we're going to Davy Jones' Locker because that's where Jack was banished after getting eaten by the Kraken-"

"The Kraken? He's not yea high-" she pointed to the top of the highest mast, "And really tentacle-y?"

"Yes, actually."

"Oh, we know him! ...or her." Theo scratched her head. "I wonder which it was."

"You..." Will glanced from Theo to Isa then back again. "You know it?"

"Well, in a manner of speaking." Isa frowned. "Beckett ordered Jones to kill it. Or so the rumours say," she added quickly, realising her mistake. The last thing she wanted was to be on a ship full of pirates and them all to find out they were under the pay of Lord Beckett. "But go on. Who's Jack?"

Another crewmember butted in on the conversation. "You don't know Jack Sparrow?"

"Um, no."

"He'll be mighty heart-broken to hear that." He grinned. "The name's Gibbs."

"Isa," Isa said, then, pointing to Theoli, "Theo."

"Strange names ye have there," Gibbs said, scratching his chin. "Not that it be any problem, o' course. But back to Jack... Aye, never known a man quite like 'im-"

"Thank God," Will muttered, smiling when Theo snickered.

After clearing his throat loudly, Gibbs continued. "As I were sayin', never known a man quite like cap'n Jack Sparrow. There ain't a tree he couldn't charm the birds from," he said, chuckling. "Witty, shrewd, and sharper than he lets on-"

"And far, far more devious."

"But even so, he has his loyal, kind and chivalrous side. He even sacrificed himself so's as we could all escape as he went down with his beloved Pearl..." He sniffled loudly, putting his hand to his heart. "That's why we're goin' to get 'im out of the Locker; we're bringin' 'im back."

Isa glanced at Will, knowing full well that wasn't _his_ reason for going to the Locker and getting Jack back. Still, she wasn't one to ruin the mood. She looked out over the railing at the open waters, sort of beginning to understand the freedom that came with being a pirate. Her headache was beginning to come back and this time she didn't bother to try and push it right back; just keep the vision at bay for now.

Gibbs seemed to recover his composure enough to ask, "So what're your stories?"

Before Theo could reply, Isaviel began to speak, "We were normal young girls not an age ago we led normal lives, were educated, lived comfortably and were happy that way. Then we found the compass, and everything changed. We had to fight to survive, do things we're not proud of only to find ourselves here, the furthest place we could ever hope to be from home." Gibbs nodded, apparently agreeing with her words.

Theo reached over. "Dude, are you oka-"

She dismissed the interruption with a wave of her hand. "Since then I've seeing things that no person should ever have to see and the burden is mine alone; powerless to stop it, yet unable to stop seeing." She stood up and grinned. "Y'see Mister Gibbs, Mister Turner, we came with you because there was nothing else for us to do. We're stuck somewhere that's very far from home with no way back."

With that, she turned and walked back up towards the helm, leaning onto the railing when a sudden dizzy spell made her want to hurl. She took the compass from her belt and opened it, watching the arrow and finding it somewhat soothing.

"So where is he?"

She gave Theo a sideways glance. "Who?"

"You know who," she said, waving a bottle in her face.

"What's that?"

"Rum."

"You do remember the last time you had a drink, right?" She raised an eyebrow. "You threw up repeatedly and kept saying the world was going to end."

Theo pouted. "Hey, that was vodka, and don't bring that up again, ever. Also, don't you be changing the subject, missy." She took a swig from the bottle. "Where is he?"

"I don't know what you mean."

Theo leant closer. "I mean Beckett, foo'. That thing's pointing at him, isn't it?"

Isa could tell her cheeks were turning pink. You know that feeling of heat that bubbles up through your body only to amass at your face, turning it into some sort of furnace? That's what she felt like. "I don't know, maybe."

"Mm-hmm. Yeah. So which direction is he in?"

"For God's-"

She felt the sudden, inexplicable sensation of having a bucket of cold water over her head as the headache suddenly disappeared and the vision came. Whether it was because she rejected it earlier she didn't know, but this time it was different; she was still awake and she wasn't actually _in_ the vision. A series of images flashed through her mind quicker than she could grasp their meaning and the only thing that stuck was the pain, the screaming, the anguish and mostly, the death.

And then finally it was over, and her mind could stop. Rest.

"Isa?"

She could hear Theo, but couldn't move to face her. She could think though, so Isa guessed it was some sort of reaction that her brain was giving at the assault it was subjected to.

The question was repeated, "Isa?"

She started to fall forwards over the railing and Theo spent the next few frantic moments clinging to Isa before she fell, yelling for someone to help her. Then unconsciousness consumed her.


	7. Snot Pellets

**A/N:** Hope you like this. ;D The girls are close to meeting Captain Jack Sparrow now!

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Seven: Snot Pellets**

**I. **

When Isaviel opened her eyes she was laid flat on the deck, dripping wet, with various familiar faces hovering above her. Unbeknownst to her at that moment Theo was lying right next to her, also wet from having jumped off the ship to grab her friend and stop her from drowning, and beside _her_ was a semi-wet Will, who had dragged the two on board when some trickery with ropes was mastered in order to bring the two back on board. Throughout the ordeal Isa had been unconscious, but thankfully still breathing.

Theo glanced at Isa, finally catching her breath enough to speak. "You okay?"

There was no reply. Instead, Isa gazed up into the darkening dusk sky, eyes glazed over, totally oblivious to anything and everything around her. Her head would lull gently from side to side in time with the rocking of the ship, as if she wasn't really awake at all or that she was in a very deep trance.

Theo sat up, immediately knowing something was up. She leant in as she whispered, "Isa? Isa, speak to me."

Tia Dalma pushed through to the front of the crowd, giving anyone in her way a stern glare as she went. She knelt down on Isa's other side and held her hand out, letting it hover above the girl's face for a few seconds before withdrawing it. "What did you see?"

There was a short silence. Then the girl on the deck began to speak in a hushed voice, so soft that only those closest could really hear her. "Death... the open waters are rife with it, stained with the blood of those the Dutchman claims." She drew a deep, shuddering breath before going on. "It shows no mercy to anyone nor anything, sweeping across the ocean and obliterating anyone and anything in its path, not stopping until all pirates are gone."

She began to claw at the air with her right hand whilst holding neck with the other as if she couldn't breathe. Theo grabbed the flailing hand and held it steady. "Shh, breathe. Deeeeeep breaths. Like they were doing on that yoga DVD we bought just to laugh at." She smiled when Isa responded by slowing her erratic breathing. "There you go. Nobody can get you here, you're safe," she soothed, looking around the crew as if daring them to challenge her word. "Go on... what did you see next?"

Isa's hand uncurled from her neck and rose slightly, clenching rhythmically. "The heart... The heart of Davy Jones is aboard the Dutchman..."

Tia Dalma's eyes narrowed. "Why?"

"Control. The East India Trading Company wants the Dutchman and its Captain to do as commanded, when commanded to do it, and the easiest way to do that is to flaunt that which gives them the upper hand." She seemed to want to go on, then hesitated a moment. Then she twitched, confusion becoming apparent in her face. "There was a man... I don't know who he was. He tried to stab the heart when nobody was looking, not knowing what must happen and whose heart must replace that which was lost, not knowing that the Dutchman must have a captain."

"What happened to him?"

"He... he died. Was _killed_. He saw me."

Theo blinked. "Saw you? How?" Isa shook her head, then closed her eyes. Theo gave a noise of contemplation, wondering how she could snap her friend out of her stupor. "Alright," she said, eventually. "I saw this on TV once, so bear with me... Isa? Can you hear me?" A nod. "Good, focus on the sound of my voice alone, listen to what I'm about to say to you. I'm going to count backwards from 5 and with each number you're going to feel not only more awake, but more awesometastic too-"

Will elbowed her.

"Okay, fine, no more awesometastic, but more awake. You will remember what just happened here, and you will remember what you saw, but the pain and the hurt will have dissipated, some. Okay... 5... 4... starting to wake up now, 3... your eyes are opening-" (which, indeed, they did) "2, wide awake now, 1!"

Isa blinked. She sat up and looked around until her eyes focused on Theo. "...dude, why are you wet? Wait, why am _I_ wet?"

Theo pouted. "So much for remembering."

"Oh. Wait." Isa scratched her head. "I fell overboard."

"Aye, caused a lot of trouble, there," Barbossa said, before turning and stomping back to the helm. Since the drama was apparently over, everyone turned and headed back to their stations, giving Isa the odd nervous glance. They huddled in groups and talked amongst themselves, occasionally looking back at the girls and Will, who was still sat with them. Elizabeth was talking to Tia Dalma, neither of whom were paying any heed to them.

"They seem a little... underwhelmed."

"I'd say they were more wary or scared of you," Will said, helping each of the girls up as he smiled at them. "Unfortunately, what you said doesn't exactly fill any of us with confidence."

"Well, no, that's not very surprising," Isa admitted, shrugging her shoulders a little. "_You_ don't seem scared."

"It's hard to be scared of you when you have a friend who is willing to risk her own life to save yours. You can't be all that bad to have friends like that." Will smiled at the girls as he walked away to talk to Barbossa.

Theo watched him leave, then sighed wistfully once he was out of earshot. "Dayum, he's so dreamy."

Isa rolled her eyes then clicked her fingers in front of Theo's face. "Can we focus on the problem at hand please?"

"Oh, right, yeah." Theo had a thought. "You know you said that the guy you saw could see you?"

"Yeah, it was incredibly strange. Like, he looked right at me, then said, 'help'." She shivered at the memory. "I can only assume it was cause he was dead. It was weird."

"How odd," Theo agreed, deep in thought. "Also, what about Beckett?"

"What about him?"

"Well, you kind of have the hots for a guy who's pure evil. I mean, I'm not judging you on your taste in men, but you may want to reconsider that path you're wanting to get up-close and personal with, if you catch my drift."

Isa stared. "I... I really don't. What the hell?"

"You, and wanting to rub up on Beckett. You need to stop thinking that way like, now."

She gave an exasperated sigh. "Theo, I can't help how I _feel_."

"Ah ha! So you agree that you have the hots for him?"

Theo waggled her eyebrows suggestively, and once Isa realised her mistake she administered a well-placed slap to the back of her friend's head upon the start of very deliberate kissy-noises from Theo, who was generally acting like a turnip. Isa earned a pout for her efforts. "As I was trying to say, I can't just _stop_."

"Well, you can if you find someone hotter? Though Will? He's mine."

"Your- Theo, he's engaged to Elizabeth."

She grinned. "For now."

Isa shook her head, grinning as Theo skipped off to 'get further acquainted' with Will. She turned her attention back to the waters, trying to focus on the ripples and waves created by the ship as it sliced through the sea on it's way to World's End but unable to stop her mind from edging back to thoughts of her vision. Theo's words seem to have done the trick to a certain extent, but nobody could see what she had seen and not feel that sickness in the pit of their stomach. The image of the bodies floating lifeless on the water will haunt her for a very long time.

**II.**

"Oh Jesus, I think my ovaries are gonna freeze off."

The girls were currently huddled together below deck, wearing as many layers as they possibly could without having to be _rolled_ anywhere they wanted to go. Katamari was an awesome game, but not really reality-compatible, especially on a ship. As they had sailed farther and farther towards their destination it had grown steadily colder until even their eyelashes had icicles hanging off them. So the two had retreated to find somewhere slightly warmer than in the open air, where Isa had found a warm looking coat and put it on over the one she was already wearing, whereas Theo looked like she'd managed to find the carcass of some woolly mammoth and had skinned it and wrapped herself up in its pelt.

"Theo, that's not possible," Isa said, shuddering from the freezing temperatures. "Though I'm pretty sure my snot is totally frozen."

Theo laughed. "Dude, gross. Although... we could make a killing holding a 'snot pellet Olympics'."

"...hold a _what_?"

"Snot pellet Olympics, to see who can shoot theirs the furthest. You know, you can shoot them of you close one nostril with your finger and then-"

"Okay! I get it!" Isa grimaced. "How would you be able to tell whose was whose?"

Theo stopped mid-glee. "...dammit."

"I'm going to go up on deck," Isa said, getting up from the corner where the girls were huddled and trying to keep warm. "I'm going to go insane stuck down here until it gets warmer."

"Oh, thanks," Theo pouted. "You want to freeze like that dude we had to throw into the water?"

"Not really," she replied, already heading up the stairs without offering any explanations.

After a moment Theo scrambled to her feet and followed her. The girls headed over to where Will was sat, turning what looked like some sort of chart with circular rings that you could turn. He glanced up when he finally noticed the girls were either side of him. "Come back up for air?"

"I'd much prefer staying out of the wind, but someone needs to keep an eye on Isa." She ignored Isa's sigh and pointed to the chart, plonking herself onto a large crate. "Whassat?"

"Charts that will take us to World's End. Allegedly."

"Allegedly?"

"Well, this seems to not make any sense whatsoever. 'Over the edge, over again'," he began, then turned one of the rings and pointed to the bottom. "'Sunrise sets, flash of green'."

"Wow, that makes absolutely no sense," Theo said, nodding, as if she'd solved the greatest mystery of our time.

"Thank you for that, Captain Obvious," Isa chuckled, taking a closer look at the map, thanking Will when he stood up to let her do so.

Theo noted that Will, in nothing but a thin looking shirt and some slacks, - not exactly your ideal winter clothing - shivering and patted the space beside her, but Will only gave her a querying look. "Sit and I'll share this with you."

"I'm alright," Will said, trying to put a brave face on things by smiling.

Theo winced at the sight of his red raw cheeks. "Dude, your teeth are actually _chattering_. C'mon, I'd hate for us to have to throw you overboard because you turned into a Will-sicle." She flapped the fur in a beckoning manner until Will shrugged and sat beside her, letting her throw the fur over his shoulders.

Isa picked up the chart then turned to the huddled couple. "I'm going to ask Barbossa about this. I'll be back in a bit."

After a few steps she very nearly collided with Elizabeth, who was glowering at Will and Theo in a less than pleasant manner... not that there's actually a pleasant way to glower. One hand was on her hip as the other held a cloak around her shoulders and she was tapping her foot against the deck, nervously. "What's your whore of a friend doing?" She demanded, loud enough for practically everyone to hear. Hell, even the penguins probably heard that.

Isa twitched. "What did you say?"

"You heard," she snapped, still glaring at Theo.

"Oh hell no," Isa said, angrily. "You aren't really one to be lecturing _anybody_ on whoredom, Miss I-Made-Out-With-Jack-Sparrow-Before-Feeding-Him-To-The-Kraken Swann!" The crew fell silent, and all eyes turned on Elizabeth, who recoiled as if she'd been slapped.

"How did-"

Quite honestly, she didn't know how she knew that, since she hadn't seen it in a vision or a dream. It had just been like it was knowledge that had always been there. She had no time to be dealing with that particular drama now, though, so she smoothly said, "Psychic, bitch." With that, she pushed past the bewildered woman and headed to the helm, where Barbossa had remained the entire time, though not without listening to the goings on.

"So," he said when Isa approached. "She _fed_ Jack to the Kraken, did she?"

Isa wasn't really in the mood, but she wasn't about to argue with the only guy who could sail the ship properly. "Yeah."

"Would you happen to know if she'd be in love with Jack?"

"None of my business."

"Neither was what you just divulged."

"That was in defence of a friend," Isa said then handed the charts over without waiting for another retort, letting him open it up and have a look before speaking again. "'Over the edge, over again. Sunrise sets, flash of green'. Do you know what it means?"

Barbossa gave a shrewd grin. "Ever a-gazed upon the green flash, Master Gibbs?"

Gibbs climbed the steps behind Isa. "I reckon I seen my fair share. Happens on rare occasion; at the last glimpse of sunset a green flash shoots up into the sky. Some go their whole lives without seeing it, some _claim_ to have seen it and some say-"

"It signals when a soul comes back to this world!"

Isa blinked at the interruption, then averted her attention to the man who spoke.

"From the _dead_."

There was a silence as his words sank in. Isa chewed her lip in deep contemplation; a soul back from the dead? Would that mean Jack Sparrow would have something to do with this green flash? There was, of course, no way of knowing now since they were currently in the middle of nowhere freezing their butts off, but the tale was curious all the same.

"Trust me, Miss Gale," Barbossa said, handing the charts back to Isa. "It's not getting to the land of the dead that's the problem." He turned and went back to the wheel, a strange gleam in his eye as he looked out towards the horizon. "It's getting back."


	8. Locker Antics

**A/N:** I think this is the start of where canon starts to get bent out of shape beyond all recognition. Also, we're finally seeing out first glimpse of Jack!

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Eight: Locker Antics**

**I. **

Isa should have known that her comment about Jack wouldn't go forgotten or ignored, especially after Elizabeth locked herself into the cabin and refused to come out and explain herself to those who sailed under Captain Sparrow before his apparent sacrifice. Will was also looking quite angered, hammering on the door as he demanded Elizabeth come out and tell them all the truth.

As Isa descended the steps Theo scurried over. "Dude, what the hell?"

"What?"

"You started major drama down here," Theo said, in a low voice. "Not that it's not appreciated, of course. Just... how _did_ you know? Did you get another Mystic Meg moment?"

Isa sighed. "No, I didn't. It was weird, like I knew it, but I don't remember how I came to know it." Theo looked confused, so Isa tried to make things a little clearer. "I didn't have a vision or anything about it, but I just _knew_ what she'd done. I'd said it before I had time to even think about what I was saying."

"That's... pretty freaky."

"Tell me about it." Isa glanced over to Will. "I don't suppose I can hide anywhere?"

Theo gave a sympathetic smile. "Well, since everyone's heading this way, I'd say not."

For the first time since they'd met, Will looked angry and confused. "Is it true?" He asked as he approached the girls. "What you said about Jack, is it?"

Isa glanced around at the crew, all of whom listening intently so they didn't miss a word. She noted that Gibbs was hanging back out of the way, although he was clearly also listening. The young girl sighed. "Did Miss Swann say anything to debate the matter?"

"No. She's not really saying much at all right now."

Isa leant back against the railing, crossing her arms over her chest as she raised her eyebrows in a 'well, what can I say?' sort of way. "It's not particularly surprising, especially if she still feels guilty about it."

"You weren't there," Gibbs said, and the crowd made a path for him as he walked over to stand beside Will. "How do you know what happened?"

Theo frowned. "Well, she wasn't messing around when she was speaking earlier, you know. She really did see that stuff."

"How can we possibly know or verify that?"

"Can you think of a way for Isa to know what happened without actually being there?"

The man fell silent. After a moment of lip-chewing he looked back to Isa. "What happened?"

Isa wanted to spare Will too many specific details, so she vagued it up wherever possible. "Elizabeth kissed Jack to trap him on the Pearl. She got him in those handcuff things you had on the mast." Okay, so she made the entire affair seem trivial, but it wasn't like she knew how the two were feeling at the time, is it?

Will turned his back to her. "She... does she love him?"

Isa stayed silent, not wanting to confirm or deny something that, really, had nothing to do with her; it was something that Will would have to ask Elizabeth herself, because Isa wasn't willing to speak on her behalf, especially about something so personal as feelings of love. "Ask her," she said, eventually. "I won't second-guess her emotions. I know of her actions, nothing more." She didn't wait for an answer as she walked past Will and headed downstairs. A sudden fatigue had overcome her, and as soon as she rolled herself into her hammock she was out like a light.

**II. **

Over the days that followed, Isa realised she knew much more than she had originally thought she did, about not just the crew and its dearly departed Captain but also Beckett and Norrington. The feeling was like slowly getting your memory back after a long time without it, rather than some newfound revelation that came to her as a shock. Even the distinct feeling of discomfort she had when she realised she knew these facts was lessening.

Elizabeth wasn't talking to Will and Will wasn't talking to Elizabeth, but then again, nobody was really talking to Elizabeth. Only Barbossa seemed brave enough to try and strike a conversation with her but mostly the only response he got was a murmur of a grunt before she wandered off somewhere else. Elizabeth had, as a result of her seclusion from the crew, spent a lot of time alone, staring out at a nondescript position along the distant horizon, thinking about something that obviously brought a lot of pain. Meanwhile, Will had begun to spend more time with Theo, who had gladly started to teach him about the art of parapara to help him take his mind off his current woes. It seemed to be working, and she reported to Isa each time she got a smile out of him. Isa just smiled and nodded, ignoring the niggling feeling of guilt in the back of her mind that she had caused this; she had opened her big mouth and had made more than a few people absolutely miserable. The crew, Mister Gibbs in particular, had been under the impression that Jack sacrificed himself for them so that they could get away safely, and she'd all but obliterated that thought.

It was thoughts like this that had kept Isa from sleeping, causing her to toss and turn until she got fed up and went up to get some fresh air. Barbossa had informed them that they should catch a couple of hours sleep now, he was confident that they'd be fine for the time being, so everyone was below deck, collectively snoring loud enough to probably cause a mini-tsunami. It meant that she didn't need to take care to stay quiet when she crept up the stairs and onto deck, where she saw Elizabeth, staring, as always, out at the ocean. After a moment's hesitation she joined the woman.

"Sorry," she began. Elizabeth glanced over. "For saying what I said, I mean. It wasn't my place to do so even if I knew about it."

Elizabeth smiled softly. "No, I shouldn't have kept it from them to begin with, and I shouldn't have started the argument you ended. I don't blame you for anything."

The two fell into a silence, saying nothing as they watched the reflection of the moon on the dark waters.

"Do you love Jack?"

"...I don't know."

"Will?"

"I..." She sighed. "I really wish I knew. I've been all over the place since I- Well, you know." She turned to face Isa. "I guess you think I'm a terrible person."

She snorted. "I'm sure there are more terrible people than you in the world."

"I trapped him. I left him to die."

"And you're here to get him back," Isa said, matter-of-factly. "Can't be that terrible a person to go through this shit to get Jack back, now, can you?"

Elizabeth gave a deep, shuddering sigh. "I needed that, to know that I'm not a bad person, I mean."

"Then I aim to please," came the reply, with a shrewd grin. "So what are you planning to do about Will?"

"What can I do? I don't even know how I feel about him anymore. It's not just because of what happened with you," she added quickly, seeing the sad look of guilt on Isa's face. "This started long before you two came along. Perhaps we just weren't meant to be?"

Isa said nothing. There was nothing she could really offer in the way of comforting words anyway, what does one say to a woman who might just have realised she doesn't love her fiancé anymore? Thankfully that wasn't a situation Isa had been in. "Perhaps," she ended up saying, unhelpfully.

After another short silence, "Make sure Theo looks after Will?"

Isa nodded, "I will, but are you sure about-"

"No," Elizabeth cut off. "I'm not sure of anything right now and that's the problem. If Theo can make Will happy, then he deserves that much."

"But-"

"I don't know whether I love him," she said, despairingly. "I don't _know_. Does that sound like true love?"

"No..."

"Sorry," Elizabeth said, shaking her head. "You don't need this further burden."

"Don't worry, I can deal. You just worry about yourself."

She nodded, then left Isa alone, walking down the stairs to get some sleep. Isa was still feeling irritatingly awake, so she let the other woman go, then took a stroll around the ship in an effort to bore herself to sleep. She'd just passed the mast when a sudden movement caught her attention.

"Will?"

Will was sat with his back to the mast, looking misty-eyed and upset. He gave her a nod as way of greeting, but didn't say anything to her. Isa realised that he'd probably heard the entire conversation that had just gone on, and didn't understand why he hadn't interrupted them or tried to convince Elizabeth away from her decision.

"Did you-"

"Yes."

"...sorry."

Will smiled. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

Isa went and sat with him, with her back to the mast. "I started the drama."

"If it took something so small to cause this, then it can't have been true love." He shrugged, lightly. "It doesn't upset me as much as it should. I think I knew about her feelings for Jack but I didn't want to accept it, that Jack could take something like that from me..." He trailed off.

She frowned. "Do you want me to go..."

"No," he said. "I'd appreciate the company, although I may be terrible to sit next to."

"I've had worse. You should have seen Theo the day we went to buy the new Pogo Master 3000, only to be told they'd sold out. She literally fell to her knees, thrusting her fists into the sky as so," Isa stopped to raise her own fists to the sky. "Then she lets out this heart-wrenching 'NOOOOOOO!!!'. Seriously, I had to get the help of the security guys to drag her away from the empty display boxes before she chewed them to bits." The two laughed together, not really because of the story but because Theo's reaction had been so... _Theo_. "She sulked for a month after that until I managed to get one because a friend of a friend knew someone who could get me one."

"You two seem close."

"We're as close as two insane girls can be, I suppose," Isa chuckled. "We've had some rough deals in the past, so we've kinda learned to rely on one another."

Will nodded. "I see..."

"You can rely on Theo, you know."

He gave her a questioning look.

"You know how Theo feels about you, and it's not just that she thinks you're attractive." Will looked away, possibly to hide his blushes although she couldn't see them anyway. Isa got to her feet and took a few paces before turning to face Will. "You can trust her. We may have secrets and other things we can't yet tell you, but her heart is true. Even if you don't believe a word I say, believe that much."

She smiled before heading back down below deck to try and get at least a little more sleep before daybreak. Something told her they'd need it.

**III.**

Isa was woken with a start by a violent shaking, causing her all but fall out of the hammock she had been curled up in. "Jeez," she muttered, trying to clamber to her feet. "What's the emergency?!" Isa looked up to see Theo looking remarkably serious for once.

"We're going to fall off a WATERFALL."

"...a waterfall."

"Seriously, we- just come with me!" She grabbed the other girl's arm before dragging her onto deck and pointing furiously at their heading.

Sure enough, the ship was heading right for a waterfall. The water's currents had sped up, pulling the ship towards its impending doom whilst its crew worked furiously to try and prevent the inevitable. Elizabeth turned to Barbossa, fury in her eyes.

"You've doomed us all!"

"Don't be so unkind," he replied, heading towards her, grabbing her face in his hand when he got close enough to do so. "You may not survive to pass this way again, and these'll be the last friendly words you'll hear."

The ship began to shift so that it was sideways on with the waterfall, allowing the girls to take a good look towards the edge. Everyone began to panic, running around and trying to find ways to secure the ship, and themselves so they didn't die in the process of falling, which was looking like a distinct possibility. Isa grabbed hold of the ropes near where Barbossa was stood while Theo grabbed one of the railings along the stairs with Will holding her for good measure.

The last thing Isa heard was Will yelling to everyone to hold on, and then the ship listed dangerously as it swung with its back end hanging off the edge. Then with surprising speed the ship began to point vertically towards the sky as it fell, tossing them all over the place. Isa watched the unfortunate ones fall over the side of the ship, unable to hold on like the rest of them. She remembered hoping the others would be okay, that she'd survive, and thinking that if she survived this, she would wipe the laugh from his throat and kick Barbossa into oblivion.

Then everything went black.

...at least for a while, until Isa managed to get her wits about her. She was on a beach, in shallow water which covered half her face, causing her to jolt up and let out a hacking cough as she clawed over the sand, dragging herself out of the water. Her breaths were quick and ragged, and her heart hadn't yet recovered from the intense situation they'd apparently just survived. After she managed to calm herself down she laughed, glad to be alive. Then she thought of Theo and her heart started racing again. She got to her feet and scanned the area where her fellow crewmates were already up and about, wandering around until she finally saw the familiar face.

"Thank God," she said as she threw her arms around a bedraggled Theo. "You're alive!"

"Yeah, just about." She turned and spat some seaweed out. "Dude, that stuff is gross."

Isa smiled, glad that Theo was still her same old self.

"This truly is a Godforsaken place," Gibbs said.

Elizabeth looked around. "I don't see Jack. ...I don't see anyone."

"He's here!" Barbossa said, remarkably with his hat still on his head. Isa and Theo exchanged looked of awe before turning back to the captain, who continued, "Davy Jones never once gave up that which he took."

"Does it matter?" Will snapped. "We're trapped here by your doing, no different than Jack."

"Witty Jack is closer than you think," Tia Dalma cooed, softly, grinning inanely as she turned her gaze towards the dunes in the distance.

Isa blinked. Just past the closest hill she could see...a mast?

Theo gawked. "What the shit?"

They all watched as a ship came sailing through the sand as if it were water, and as it got closer they could see there was a man stood upon the tallest mast. The ship climbing up and over the tall dune before smoothly rolling downwards into the water they had just crawled out of, gently moving through the sand with a soft 'whoosh'. Isa's jaw fell open, with the girl rendered unable to form coherent thoughts let alone actual words. Theo, however, looked like Christmas had come early.

"Dude. The cool scale just _totally_ imploded."


	9. Tis But A Dream

**A/N:** Um. Nothing much to say, really. XD Thank you so much for the reviews, guys. Loveyouall! 3

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Nine: Tis But A Dream...**

**I. **

The girls had continued staring at the ship, which was now quite far from the shore, and had lagged behind everyone else as they had rushed over to greet the captain who had come back on a little rowing boat. Isa noticed that Elizabeth was hanging back, seemingly unsure about whether she should approach him or not, probably still unsure about her own feelings towards him. When the girls joined the end of the queue, a conversation between Jack and some of the crew was already going on.

"Why is that?!" Jack bellowed at a bewildered Gibbs.

"It may have helped to have heard the start of that," Theo said, sighing.

"Sir, you're... you're in Davy Jones' Locker," Gibbs replied.

Jack glanced around shiftily before looking back at Gibbs, slight look of smugness on his face. "I know that. I know where I am, and _don't_ think I don't!"

"He... reminds me of someone," Isa muttered, looking pointedly at Theo, who put a finger to her lips in contemplation.

"Really? Can't think who."

From beside them, Barbossa walked forwards. "Jack Sparrow."

Jack stared for a moment before breaking out into a jovial grin, swaggering over to him and speaking as if to an old friend, "Ah, Hector! It's been too long... hasn't it?"

Theo tugged on Isa's sleeve and whispered. "Do you mean that guy from college, with the dorky hat?"

Isa rolled her eyes. "No, not him."

"Hrmmm."

"-you shot me, remember?"

Jack shot him an amused face. "No I didn't." He left a confused looking Barbossa behind as he continued along the line, "Tia Dalma! Out and about, eh? You add an agreeable sense of the macabre to any deliria." Tia Dalma stared, unsure about how she was meant to react to the statement.

Beside Theo, Will sighed. "He thinks we're a hallucination."

"William, tell me something," Jack said, sidestepping so that he was standing in front of the man he was now speaking to. "Have you come because you need me help to save a certain distressing damsel?"

Theo snorted.

"Or rather," he shook his head, "Damsel in distress? Either one."

"No," Will replied, deadpan.

"Well then you wouldn't be here, would you? So you can't be here. Q. E. D., you're not really here!"

"Oh man, I love this guy," Theo whispered to Isa.

Isa elbowed Elizabeth. "Jack," she said, stepping towards the captain. "This is real. We're here."

Jack stared at Elizabeth for a few moments, twitching every so often as he glanced towards other members of the group stood before him. Isa could hear the cogs in his brain straining to move as his mind made the connection that yes, they are, in fact, here. He turned and scurried back along the sand and leaned in to speak to Gibbs.

"The locker, you say?"

"Aye."

Elizabeth followed. "We've come to rescue you!"

Jack span on his heel. "Have you now? That's very kind of you, but it would seem that as I possess a ship and you don't, you're the ones in need of rescuing. I'm not sure as I'm in the mood."

Theo nodded. "He makes a valid argument."

"Oh hush," Isa whispered back.

"I see my ship, right there," Barbossa said, pointing to the ship that had just sailed over the sand dune.

Jack squinted as he stared into the distance, hand shielding his eyes from the sun. "Can't spot it," he called back, shaking his head slightly. "Must be a tiny little thing hiding somewhere behind the Pearl."

"Jack!" Will finally lost his patience. "Cutler Beckett has the heart of Davy Jones."

Theo glanced at Isa, who had begun to shift uneasily from one foot to the other, but neither said a word.

"He controls the Flying Dutchman-"

"He's taking over the seas-"

"The song has already been sung! The Brethren Court is called!"

"I leave you people alone for just a minute and look what happens; everything's gone to pot!" Jack began to make his way away from the group.

"Aye, the world needs you back something fierce!"

"And you need a crew."

Jack stopped and turned to face them all again. "Why," he began, "Should I sail with any of you? Four of you have tried to kill me in the past, one of you succeeded!"

"So he's still a little sore about that," Theo said, looking as if some dastardly plan had been ruined by this revelation.

"Jack, I had no choice," Elizabeth pleaded.

"Ah, well, you'll have plenty of time to mull over that statement and see if, in fact, you had no other choice. I'm sure a smart girl like you can think of something." Jack smiled, walking forwards whilst making a sweeping gesture towards the sandy expanse he had just sailed out from. "There's plenty of room for you all."

"Now," Tia Dalma cooed. "Don't tell me you didn't enjoy it at the time."

The two chuckled together as she toyed with the beads on his beard. "Oh, alright, you're in." He continued along the line. "Don't need you, you scare me," he said to Ragetti. "Gibbs you can come, Marty..." He grimaced at Pintel and swiftly moved on without a word. "Cotton!" He nodded. "Cotton's parrot, I'm a little iffy, but at least I'll have someone to talk to..."

He came to the girls, who smiled brightly. "...who are you?"

"Isaviel," Isa said, then corrected herself, "Isa."

Theo saluted. "Theo. We've never met."

Jack nodded. "I can see that. Why should I take you along?"

Theo pondered for a moment. "...we're pretty?" Jack seemed to consider the reason but didn't look convinced, so Theo tried again; "I idolise you?" Jack gave a shrug as if to say 'well, naturally', but apparently needed a little more.

Isa unhooked the compass from her belt and held it up. "This?"

Jack blinked, then narrowed his eyes at the young girl before him, staring at her curiously. "Now, how did you come to be in possession of such a thing?"

Isa grinned, mischievously. "I picked a few pockets, heard a few rumours. Why else would I be here?"

Jack reached for the compass so she swiftly closed her hand around it and pulled it back. "Fine, you're in," Jack said, moving past them and taking the compass from Isa's now outstretched hand before jolting to a stop. "Who are _you_?"

"Tai Huang," came the reply. "These are my men."

"Where do your allegiances lie?"

"With the highest bidder."

"Well... I have a ship?"

Tai Huang grinned. "That makes you the highest bidder."

Jack nodded. "Good man!" He turned. "Weigh anchor, all hands, prepare to make sail!" He flipped open his compass, with Isa and Theo peering over his shoulders at the arrow which span round and round, not even looking like it may stop.

"Jack."

The three looked up to see those who were meant to be left behind, grinning as Barbossa tapped the charts he was holding in his hand. "Which way're ye going, Jack?"

**II.**

"You were going to leave us!"

As soon as the crew had set foot on the Pearl, Barbossa and Jack had begun some petty argument about who was in charge of the Pearl and eventually they settled on sharing the position of Captaincy... although Isa held little to no hope of them maintaining this level of civility. Will had cornered Isa and Theo to 'discuss' what had happened on the beach.

"Oh, take a chill pill, Will," Theo said, before thinking a moment, then bursting into a fit of giggles. "Chill pill, Will," she repeated to herself, shaking her head at her immense wit.

Isa rolled her eyes at Theo, again, before addressing Will. "We weren't going to leave you there _permanently_," she said. "Just so we could find a way to convince him to turn the ship around."

"Convince him how?"

Before Isa could reply, Theo butted in, "With our womanly charms. Obviously."

Will glanced at Isa, who shook her head. He turned back to Theo. "...and if that didn't work?"

"Knock him out, gag him, tie him up and steal the ship."

"So... mutiny."

Theo waved her hand, dismissively. "You say to-may-to, I say to-mah-to."

"You wouldn't be prodding semantics if it had worked and we'd saved your butts." Isa smirked. "Good thing we didn't need to resort to that plan though, since I kinda like Jack. He's crazy."

Theo suddenly remembered something. "Oh, hey, did you remember who he reminded you of?"

Will glanced at Isa again, and she, again, shook her head before replying, "No, 'fraid not."

"I wonder who it was... I can't think of anyone like Jack."

"No, I'm sure." She shook her head as she left the two and walked down the steps into the hold area. Elizabeth was sat on the bottom step, with her knees hugged to her chest, looking remarkably sorry for herself. "Yo."

"Ho," Elizabeth replied with a slight grin, glancing over as Isa sat beside her.

Isa laughed. "I see what you did there." She got herself settled on the uncomfortable step. "So, how're you doing? After seeing Jack, I mean."

Elizabeth shrugged. "I don't know. I'm happy we found him, and that he's safe, but..." She trailed off, ending with a woeful sigh. "I just wish I knew what I wanted, even if it's something I can't have. At least then I'd know for sure."

"Well, you could always try the compass? I could borrow it from Jack."

"I tried that before, it's partly what got me into this mess."

"Oh, yeah," she said. "Hrm..."

"Wait," Elizabeth turned to face Isa as she spoke. "'Oh, yeah'?"

"Yeah, sorry, can't control the whole, 'knowing stuff' thing, yet." She gave an apologetic shrug, then continued when she was sure Elizabeth wasn't going to lamp her or anything. "So, it was pointing to Jack?"

"Yes."

"Did you look any time after?"

"Well, what do you _know_?" She snapped, irritably, before burying her face in her hands and groaning. "I'm sorry. I'm terrible company right now."

Isa patted her on the back as she stood up. "No need to apologise. I'll leave you be for now, just let me know if I can do anything to help." She climbed back up on deck, not voicing her concern about Elizabeth for the time being.

When she surfaced, all she could hear was Barbossa and Jack, bickering and squabbling. Again. The crew had stopped what they were doing because the two Captains had been giving conflicting commands, so, to save the trouble, they decided to do nothing at all until someone decided what they were going to do. Isa sighed and headed to the helm, where the two were fighting for the wheel.

"I told you, it's my ship!"

"Which I gladly took off yer hands not all that long ago!"

"Aye, then you _died_. Which means it comes back to _me_!"

Theo, who was hanging upside down from the ropes nearby with Jack the monkey, beckoned Isa to come closer. Theo grinned. "He's my new friend."

"Oh? Have you no standards?"

"Hey, Jack's awesome."

"I was talking to Jack."

"Dude, cold."

Isa smirked. "Sorry, sorry. So, what are they arguing about now?"

"Who takes the helm," Theo said, flipping herself upright before lowering herself back into the deck. "Barbossa reckons he knows where he's going, so does Jack the pirate. Unfortunately they reckon we need to go that-a-way." She pointed right with her left hand and left with her right. "Then began the bitchfight."

"I see, well, someone needs to stop them before we run out of time to get out of this place." Jack the monkey leapt from the ropes, onto Theo's head and down to Isa's shoulder, giving a little chatter before looking at his master and his namesake. Isa smiled, and the girls - plus monkey - approached the danger zone.

"So when are we getting a shift on?"

Jack the monkey chattered in agreement.

Barbossa grinned. "Just as soon as this whelp lets go of the wheel."

Jack snorted. "Captain."

"No, I be the cap'n."

"No, I think you'll find that'd be me."

"Me."

"Me!"

"No, me!"

"Alright, then, how about this," Isa said, patiently. "How about I kick you _both_ overboard, and hand the helm to Theo?"

Theo's face brightened up so much she could probably be seen from space. She tugged on Isa's sleeve excitedly as she spoke, "Really? Really? Can I?"

"That depends on what _the captains_ say," Isa said, smiling to the two men still clutching to the wheel.

Barbossa was looking quite horrified at the thought of not only some random girl taking the helm on his ship, but THEO taking the helm on his ship. He knew what she was like, how excitable she was, and how she would probably run the ship aground, or make it sink without anything around to _make_ them sink. Jack, however, had no idea about what Theo was like, so he had to look around at the horror stricken faces of the crew to take his cue.

"Theo... taking the helm..."

"Yes," Isa said, nodding.

"Does she even know how to sail a ship?"

"I find your lack of faith disturbing," Theo said, voice low, dangerous. There was a long stretch of silence as people tried to work out whether the girl's dangerous tone was to be taken seriously or not. Their question was answered when the girls started snickering to themselves.

"Sorry, I couldn't keep it up."

Theo wiped a tear away. "No, me neither."

"...how's about we take the helm on alternate days," Barbossa suggested.

Isa got the feeling Jack was going to object, so she administered a swift stomp on the foot, shooting him a warning glare when he turned to her, outraged. Thinking better of his words, he shrugged. "Sounds mighty reasonable to me."

"Sorry, Theo." Isa placed a consolatory hand on the stricken girl's shoulders. "Another time."

Theo sighed, wistfully. "Oh, alright."

"We'll get you your own ship one day."

Theo looked up with eyes glistening with tears. "Really?"

"Of course," Isa said, smiling as she patted Theo on the top of her head. "Now go play."

"Yay!" She skipped off, oblivious to the looks of astonishment behind her.

Isa wiped a tear. "They grow up so fast."

Behind her, Jack turned to Barbossa. "Have they been at the rum?"

"Unfortunately for us, no."

"Well. This should be interesting."


	10. Sadness and Sorrow

**A/N:** This is a little short, but I didn't want the next part to be in this chapter, since this one ends on such a solemn note. :C This part of the film made me cry like a baby.

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Ten: Sadness and Sorrow  
**

**I. **

"I'm totally doing it," Theo said, determination shining from her deep green eyes.

Isa didn't bother looking up from the random papers she'd found in the cabin. "Doing what?"

"I," Theo proclaimed, posing, "Am going to chat up Will."

"...say what."

"You heard," Theo said, "Watch and learn." She got up and headed to where Will was leaning against the railing, looking out at the horizon which seemed to stretch on forever.

The Pearl had been sailing for a good few hours now, with nobody having any idea how to get home. Everyone had had a turn looking at the charts but nobody could make hear nor tails of the riddles around the edge, so eventually they'd given up, and decided to see where the waters took them... which was apparently _nowhere_.

"Hi there," Theo purred to Will, literally sliding along the railing. "Do you come here often?"

Will blinked. "Uh... no."

"Me neither." Theo paused. "Dammit ... Wait, wait, let me start over. Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to Heaven?" She winked and smiled expectantly.

"I'm... not wearing any tights."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"Bugger." She thought for a while before taking another stab at it. "Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes."

"Actually, my father's a cursed crewmember of the Flying Dutchman, remember."

"Oh yeah, right. Sorry, I forgot. Hold that thought." Leaving a confused looking Will behind her, she dashed back to the part of the deck where Isa was sat and trying not to laugh - and failing at doing so - at her friend's antics. "Stop laughing and give me a good line to use!"

"Why not try being honest?"

"Honest?"

"You know, just... telling it like it is."

Theo nodded. "Honest. Right. Thanks."

As she dashed back, Elizabeth took a seat beside Isa. "Are you sure that was the best thing to say?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well... telling it like it is would be all well and good, but we don't really know how Theo sees it. Whatever she takes 'it' to mean." Elizabeth chuckled at the horror-stricken look on Isa's face as the realisation dawned on her. "I'm sure she'll do fine," Elizabeth added as an attempt to reassure Isa. The two turned their attention back to Theo and Will as the former slid back along the railing.

"That," she began, winking, "Is the finest pirate booty I've ever laid eyes on."

After a short silence, during which, astonishingly, Theo managed to keep her winking pose, Will began to turn a little pink. "I... Are you coming on to me?"

Isa threw her head back in frustration and accidentally smacked her head on the mast she was leaning against, then spent the next while writhing around the deck in agony as she clutched her head, with Elizabeth hovering worriedly above her. When she'd recovered, she noted that Theo and Will were chatting away, amicably enough. She gave Elizabeth a sideways glance. "You alright with that?"

"I am, actually." She nodded. "He deserves to be happy."

"What about you?"

"I'll get back to you on that," Elizabeth said with a laugh.

Isa smiled and went into the cabin to get something else to break her boredom as the Pearl continued onwards without a proper direction, drifting along and hoping the path would make itself clear to them sooner rather than later. She knew there was a distinct possibility that they'd be trapped there forever unless someone came up with a bright idea, and the only way that could happen is if someone decoded the words on the charts, which lay on the desk, untouched since Barbossa had given up trying. Since she had nothing better to do, Isa sat at the table and had another go, wasting away the rest of the long day.

**II.**

Five hours later and Isa was still trying to work it all out, and failing in the process. Giving a frustrated grunt, she began rocking back and forth on the back legs of the chair, knowing that she was only growing more and more irritated by not knowing the answer. She sucked at riddles, but Theo seemed to love them... or love how crazy they sounded, at least.

"Yo, you have to see this," Theo called from the doorway. "Come on."

Isa followed Theo out on deck, up to the front end of the ship where Pintel and Ragetti were stood with Tia Dalma, and it didn't take Isa long before she realised why she had been called. All around them were ghostly shapes in garbs of white, floating effortlessly through the water as their ashen gowns trailed behind them, giving off a wraithlike glow. They paid no heed to the ship they were passing as they went unrecognised; nameless faces, lost souls.

"They should be in the care of Davy Jones," Tia Dalma whispered, anger evident in her voice. "That was the duty him was charged with by the Goddess Calypso, to ferry those who died at sea to the other side."

The ghosts passed by in what seemed like their hundreds, and Isa couldn't help but wonder if they were the victims of Jones and the Dutchman, whether the souls he was meant to ferry were put there by his doing. By his and by Beckett's...

"And every ten years," Tia Dalma continued, turning to look at them, with something akin to sadness and longing in her eyes. "Him could come ashore, to be with she who love him, truly..." The wistful look was gone, replaced by a cold harshness as she turned her back on them once more. "But the man has become a monster."

"So... he wasn't always..." Ragetti put his wrist to his chin and wriggled his fingers.

"Tentacle-y?" Theo finished.

"No," the woman replied. She sounded almost nostalgic. "Him was a man... once."

Ragetti looked off into the distance. "Now there's boats coming."

In the pitch black night where hundreds of tiny dots of light could be seen, floating gently, getting brighter and brighter as they got closer. Each dot was a lantern, placed in the middle of a small sailing boat on which one, sometimes two lonely souls were sat, pale and gaunt in the soft glow of the light in front of them. They weren't rowing but the boats were moving along the water and, like the ghostly shapes before them, paid the Pearl no attention.

Isa and Theo walked back until they heard the footsteps of someone approaching the edge. Gibbs was busy loading his pistol, but Theo placed a hand on the barrel and shook her head. Will gave a short nod as he spoke, "They aren't a threat to us."

Tia Dalma nodded, now stood beside Isa. "We are nothing but ghosts to them..."

"It's best just... let them be," Barbossa added, sidestepping to allow Theo to pass him so that she could get up onto the ropes at the end of the ship to get a better look at what was going on. The crew were silent, unable to avert their gaze, knowing that it was such a terrible sight but at the same time finding the scene so hauntingly beautiful.

Elizabeth came to the railing and after a moment looking at the scene before her she began to smile. "It's my father," she whispered. "We've made it back! Father!" She waved. "Father, here! Look here!"Whoever she was shouting to didn't say a word, and didn't even look as if he'd heard the woman's cries. A slightly confused look crossed her face, until Jack approached her.

"Elizabeth..." She turned to face the Captain. "We're not back."

For a moment her face went blank, and the realisation of what she was seeing, of where they were slowly filled her heart with terror. She turned back to her father and began to shout in desperation. "Father!"

In one of the boats alongside the Pearl, a regal looking man turned to see where the voice was coming from, and upon seeing his daughter his pallid face brightened, though only a little. "Elizabeth," he called back.

Isa felt her blood run cold, recognising the man immediately. He had been the one she saw in her last vision; the one whom she had seen executed on Beckett's orders after he had begun to take too much of an interest in the heart and the Dutchman. She had seen his death before it had happened and had done nothing about it. Clasping her hand to her mouth she stumbled backwards as the crew began moving along the ship with Elizabeth, catching Jack's eye, though not realising until he was stood beside her. She thought that he probably assumed that the sights had caught her off-guard. Either way, she grabbed onto his sleeve to steady himself, trying to block out the frenzied cries of a girl who was essentially watching her father die.

"Are you dead?" The man continued.

Elizabeth shook her head, frantically, mouthing, "No," but unable to voice it out loud.

"I think I am."

"No, you can't be!"

"There was this chest, you see, this heart... at the time it seemed so important..." He ignored Elizabeth's pleas and went on. "The heart, I learned that if you stab the heart, yours must take its place..."

The sombre mood made Theo bite her tongue to prevent herself from saying, "Well_duh_, we knew that."

"...and he will sail the seas for eternity; the Dutchman must have a captain. Silly thing to die for..."

Isa let go of Jack's coat and approached the railing again, not noticing the curious look in Jack's eye at the words he'd just heard. The man glanced across and saw her, apparently recognising her enough to offer a slight smile. "Ah, I remember you." Elizabeth whirled to look at Isa, an accusatory look in her eye.

Words failed the young girl, who stood there, unable to speak. Eventually she offered a solitary, "Sorry."

"Don't be," he said. "There was nothing you could do." He turned back to his daughter, who had thrown a line for him to take. "I'm so proud of you, Elizabeth."

"No, the line! Take the line!"

He didn't, and the rope slipped back over the boat and landed in the water with a soft splash. Elizabeth, now on the verge of hysteria, began to run to the end of the Pearl as frantic shouts came from the crew not to let her leave. Theo jumped off the ropes and grabbed Elizabeth by the shoulders to stop her from climbing off the ship. From below, they hear him speak one last time before his boat sailed off and away with the rest of the lost souls.

"I'll give your love to your mother, shall I?"

Will pulled the frantic woman back by the shoulders and the three of them fell to the deck. Elizabeth was inconsolable, and clung to the two as she sobbed her heart out.

Will glanced up at Tia Dalma. "Is there a way?"

She shook her head, slowly. "Him at peace..."

There was nothing anybody could say that could ease the pain so they settled on letting her cry as much as she felt she needed to and into the night Theo cradled her, rocking her gently, comfortingly, in an effort to soothe the grief-stricken woman who didn't seem as if she would ever stop crying.


	11. Parting of Ways

**A/N:** So now begins the angst and drama. ;D MWAHAHAHA! It's also my longest chapter yet! O.o

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Eleven: Parting of Ways**

**I. **

For much of the next morning Theo and Elizabeth had slept, catching up on the sleep they had missed from the night before when they had stayed up together until the sun was about to creep back over the horizon; the two hadn't spoken a word between them, but seemed to form a strong friendship over their silence. The crew let them rest, knowing that there wasn't really anything for them to do anyway even if they were awake. Isa checked up on them every half-hour or so, but they were dead to the world, and didn't resurface until the sun was beginning to sink lower in the sky. Theo had made her way to Isa whilst Elizabeth had chosen to sit on the steps, alone with her own thoughts.

"Morning," Theo muttered, yawning.

"Evening," Isa replied with a grin. She glanced in Elizabeth's direction. "Is she going to be okay?"

"I think so. It may take a while, but she's a tough one." Theo's stomach groaned prompting the girl to so the same. "I'm hungry, and thirsty."

They were running out of provisions, and fast; the water and, much to Jack's horror, the rum were both all gone, and the food was running dangerously low as well. They had to find a way out of there, and still, nobody really knew where they were going. Barbossa didn't seem to be doing anything to try and get them out of this mess and Jack... well, he was muttering to himself as he played around with the charts. Tia Dalma's depressing statements about being doomed to be trapped there forever didn't really help the mood either.

Theo approached Jack as he was having a strange conversation with himself. "Worked anything out?"

"Not sunset," he muttered, turning the center circle upside down. "Sun_down_... and rise. Up!"

Theo blinked. "Whut?"

Jack got to his feet, flailing a little as if trying to work out what exactly to do. He pointed over to the side of the ship and called, "What's that?!" Everyone immediately dashed over to the side of the ship to see what he was pointing at. "What is that," Jack continued, before answering his own question. "I dunno, what do you think?"

"...where?"

"There!"

"Am I the only one who doesn't see anything?" Theo whispered to Isa, sighing with relief when she got a headshake. "Wait, where's he-"

Jack had turned and squeaked, then ran to the opposite side of the ship, this time joined by more of the crew who were wondering what on Earth was happening. Jack immediately turned and ran back to the other side of the ship, flailing and making sounds of surprise all the way. When he'd made it to _that_ side Jack then ran back over again, confusing everyone to hell but still managing to get them to run with him.

Elizabeth jogged over and peered over the side of the ship. "What's going on?"

"Damned if I know, Jack sees something," Theo said.

Isa stopped, realising that the constant shift of weight on the deck was moving the Pearl from side to side. "We're rocking the ship?"

"We're rocking the ship!" Gibbs agreed.

"Aye," Barbossa said. "He's onto it!"

Isa rejoined the crew who kept running back and forth, each time feeling the ship list a little bit further, but eventually rocking back, sending them all into a frenzied run in the other direction. Barbossa went below deck to release everything that could help shift the weight from side to side, and Isa heard nothing but the sound of chaos down below as he resurfaced and joined them all in their running.

With a start, she realised Theo was nowhere to be seen and began to glance around as she ran to the other side. As she went, something whizzed past her with a loud, gleeful cry of, "WHEEEE!"

Isa looked skywards as she ran again, seeing Theo holding a rope that was attached to one of the masts, as she swung in the opposite direction, giving another squeal of joy. As the two crossed paths again, Isa tried to get her friend's attention, though that wasn't really easy when she had a 2 second interval during which the two could actually hear each other clearly.

"WOOO!"

"THEO!"

"YAHOO!!!"

"WOULD YOU-"

"ZOOOOOOM!!!"

"GET DOWN HERE-"

"HIIIII-"

"AND HELP?"

"-IIIIII ISAAAAaaaaa..."

As she trailed off, Isa shook her head and concentrated on the issue at hand, running and clinging to the railing as the ship creaked and groaned loudly and began to list to such a degree that they couldn't stay on that side without holding something. Still, the ship refused to flip, so they all pushed off and made their way back to the other side where, once again, they had to cling for dear life but then push off and run back over. Theo had let go of the rope and was clinging to the other railing, waiting for everyone to join her. Once they did, they held on as the ship rolled until it was on it's side, stopping dead for a moment before it began to tip further, rolling all the way over so that everyone was now suspended in mid-air.

One of the crewmen slipped and luckily fell onto the rigging. _Un_luckily, one of the cannons came loose and landed on him. Theo winced. "That's gonna hurt in the morning."

"Now up is down," Jack said as the ship slowly flipped over and dunked them into the ocean.

As they hit the water Isa and Theo shifted slightly so that they had a better grip on the railing, using the support on their weight of the water to do so. Will lost his grip when the surface of the water hit them and began to fall into the depths of the ocean, only just managing to grab hold of the rope that Theo was swinging from not moments earlier - Isa wondered why he didn't swim, but that wasn't important right now. Everyone glanced around, wondering what was going to happen now that they were upside down.

Theo motioned with her head for Isa to look downwards, and as she did so she felt a strange rumbling feeling from the water. Her eyes widened when she saw something rushing upwards towards them and until it hit them she hadn't a clue what it was; the ship had literally 'come out the other side'. Everyone was strewn across the deck as the water cleared and the Pearl floated upright again.

"Oh holy shit!" Theo flapped around the deck excitedly as everyone tried to recover from nearly drowning to death. "That was AWESOME, can we do it again?!"

"I don't think so," Isa spluttered, coughing up the water she'd inhaled.

"Dang. You know, that would make an _awesome_ ride at Disney-"

"We're back!"

As everyone got to their feet their eyes were drawn to the horizon over which the sun was slowly creeping, dawning a brand new day. Elizabeth squinted a little. "It's the sunrise..."

"Wow, we're going to suffer from jetlag something terrible," Theo said, shaking her head.

Unfortunately that was the least of their worries, as they found out when Barbossa pulled out his pistol and aimed for Jack. Gibbs, Elizabeth and Will drew their own pistols and aimed at Barbossa, as Jack drew his own and aimed at Will. Will returned the gesture with another pistol, as Elizabeth drew did the same. Jack, not one to be outdone, drew _his_ second pistol and aimed it at Elizabeth. Theo, unfortunately, was right in the center of their circle, and flailed helplessly before crawling out of the circle. Isa was just confused.

Gradually, everyone began to get the giggles, and their guns were lowered for a moment whilst they shared the unspoken joke... Until they all raised their pistols again.

"Dudes, make up your mind," Theo said, exasperatedly.

"The Brethren Court is a-gatherin' at Shipwreck Cove," Barbossa said, looking pointedly at Jack. "You and I will be going, and there'll be no arguing that point."

"I is arguing the point," Jack protested. "If there's pirates a-gathering, I'm pointing my ship the other way."

"The pirates are gathering to fight Beckett and _you're_ a pirate," Elizabeth pressed, aiming both of her pistols at Jack.

"Fight or not," Will said, also aiming both pistols at Jack, "You're not running, Jack."

Theo flailed some more. "Can't we all just _get along_!?"

Ignoring the flailage, Barbossa sneered. "If we don't stand together they'll hunt us down one by one, till there be none left, but you."

Jack shrugged. "Quite like the sound of that. 'Captain Jack Sparrow; last pirate'."

"Aye, and you'll be fighting Jones alone, how does that figure into your plan?"

"I'm still workin' on that, but I will not be going back to the Locker, mate. Count on that."

Jack pulled the trigger, and only managed to send a feeble splash in Barbossa's direction. Everyone began pulling triggers left, right and center, finding that their pistols were all waterlogged and, quite frankly, useless. Gibbs grumbled, "Wet powder."

With the drama over for now everyone dispersed much to the disappointment of Pintel and Ragetti, who tried to rile the crowds up again, though to no avail. Theo shook her head in disbelief. "Bunch of drama llamas, the lot of 'em."

Isa sighed. "Either way, we need to find somewhere to stock up on supplies or there'll be no fighting _or_ fleeing."

"There's a freshwater spring on this island," Will said, pointing to a spot on the chart after he had spread it across the nearest flat surface. "We can re-supply there, and get back to shooting each other later."

Jack glanced at Barbossa. "You lead the shore party, I'll stay with my ship."

Barbossa looked bemused. "I'll not be leaving _my_ ship in your command."

Will sighed. "Why don't you both go ashore and leave the ship in my command?" When he got two unimpressed stares, he added, "...temporarily."

"Ooh, can I go with the shore party?" Theo tugged on Barbossa's sleeve. "Can I? Can I? Please?"

Barbossa rolled his eyes, exasperatedly. "If I say no..."

"I'll tag along anyway!"

Barbossa snatched his sleeve back. "Then it looks as though I haven't a choice then, doesn't it?"

"Yay!"

Isa tried not to show any signs of amusement until Barbossa wasn't looking, then grinned. "You have fun."

"You're not coming?"

"Nah, not really in the mood for mini excursions."

"I'll bring you back a souvenir! Maybe like, one of those little umbrella things you get in drinks."

"...Theo, you're going to a freshwater spring, not a bar."

"Aw," Theo looked saddened. "No funny little gay dancers? No strobes? No... No BON JOVI?"

"No, Theo. This isn't Ibiza."

"So... so the Vengabus isn't coming? And nobody is jumping?"

"No."

"Damn. Maybe I'll just get you some sand, then."

"Yeah. That'd be nice."

So Isa stayed on the Pearl, waving to Theo who was waving back enthusiastically, stood up in the small boat and holding on to the top of Barbossa's head to keep from falling out. She kept watching until the boats were tiny dots, then stepped away from the railing and headed below deck, feeling a familiar nausea overcome her. She'd just managed to roll into a hammock when unconsciousness consumed her.

**II.**

_Isa was aboard the Dutchman, on the deck, unseen by the occasional crewman or naval officer who happened to walk across her path as she stood there, unable to move. She had experienced this enough times now to realise what it would be like but the strange feeling of someone walking _through_ you was something that she didn't see herself ever growing accustomed to. _

_It was night, and the stars shone in the night sky, letting off a solemn glow aboard the ship's deck. Ship? There were two ships. Isa walked over to the railing, not bothering to avoid people as she knew they wouldn't know she was there, and leant over to try and get a good look at the other ship. It wasn't a ship she recognised but it was remarkably like the ship they had sailed in when journeying to the Locker. She assumed that meant that it was a ship from Singapore... though, attached to the Dutchman? _

_A sound from the back of the ship drew her attention, and she made her way across the now empty deck in the general direction the sound had come from, keeping to the shadows when she saw someone, forgetting that nobody could see her anyhow. She could see someone shimmy along the ropes that tied the two ships together, and stood by the rope was Admiral Norrington, pointing his sword at one of the crew of the Dutchman. _

_"No one leaves the ship."_

_"Stand down," Norrington said, sword shaking slightly. "That's an order."_

_"That's an order," the man repeated, barely audible above the sounds of the waters below them. "Part of the crew, part of the ship." He repeated the phrase over and over, growing louder and more agitated until he turned to glance at the rope. "All hands! Prisoner escape!"_

_Norrington grabbed his pistol, bellowing, "Belay that!" Then, with anguish in his eyes, he aimed the pistol and shot the rope, severing the tie that kept the ships together. Before he could turn fully around he had a sharp object in his abdomen, and he stumbled backwards, falling down as more crewmembers crowded around._

_"The admiral's dead?"_

_Whispers of, "The admiral's dead," spread around the group as Jones pushed his way forwards to see what was going on. As he took a look at the crippled man one of the crew bellowed, "To the captain's cabin!" and they all raced off to try and regain their ship. _

_"James Norrington," Jones hissed after he'd knelt down beside the stricken man. "Do you fear death?"_

_With his last ounce of strength Norrington lunged forwards, embedding his sword in the Captain's shoulder. Then, the life left him. _

_"I take that as a no," Jones said, with more than a little snark, then took out the blade with his claw, inspecting it closely. "Nice sword." _

_When he and the other crewmember had left, Isa approached Norrington's body, kneeling down to take a closer look. She touched his hand and in an instant she knew; she knew all the hurt he'd experienced, all the pain and sacrifice he had endured, and the lengths he had gone to, all to regain his honour. She also knew that he had made the ultimate sacrifice in destroying everything he had built himself up to be, everything that he had worked to claw back, all because he had chosen a side. _

_Isa stood up, steely determination in her eyes. "I won't let this happen."_

**III.**

Theo stared at the sight before her, not entirely sure how she was meant to react, but getting a sudden sense of nausea all the same. On the beach where they had all come ashore was the Kraken's body, stretched along the sand as if it were tossed there by the sea so that the sun could bore away at it. There were birds flying over it, no doubt relishing the feast that they were lucky enough to come across, pecking away at the rotting carcass that let off an odious smell that could be described no other way that the smell of death. There wasn't much that left Theo speechless, and this was one of those rare things; for even though all that time ago she had watched the order for Jones to kill the Kraken carried out she had made a point not to watch. She didn't want to see.

Beside her, Jack and Barbossa stood, also staring at the fallen Kraken. Without a word, Jack started walking along the beach. Theo and Barbossa followed and they trudged along the beach, watching as the waves lapped at the shore and over the huge tentacles strewn along the sand. Jack walked up to the huge, unblinking eye and stared at it.

Theo walked closer, tentatively at first as though it might be waiting to spring a surprise attack, then more boldly, reaching out to touch its cold skin as she looked back into its huge eye. She couldn't help imagining that as the last expression that the Kraken had made, confusion at its master turning on it, sadness because it knew it was dying. The pain was all too clear to see, even though it was dead.

Barbossa walked up behind them. "Still thinking of running, Jack?"

"You think you can outrun the world? You know," he continued, walking further so he was nearly face-to-face with Jack. "The problem with being the last of anything, is that by and by, there'll be none left at all."

Jack tilted his head, uncertainty in his eyes. "Sometimes things come back, mate. We're living proof, you and me."

"But sometimes they don't," Theo added, softly, stepping backwards so that she was stood beside him. "What then?"

"It's a gamble of long odds," Barbossa agreed. "There's never a guarantee of coming back, but passing on, that's dead certain."

Jack gave a gentle nod, understanding that Barbossa's words were all too true, if he was the last, and he was to fall, then all piracy will have been lost to Beckett's hand. No pirate wanted that, and Theo was sure Jack didn't want that.

"Summoning the Brethren Court then, is it?"

"It's our only hope, lad."

Jack sniffed, then looked at the Kraken again. "That's a sad commentary in and of itself."

"The world used to be a bigger place," Barbossa said, despondently.

Jack shook his head. "The world's still the same. There's just... less in it."

"If there's hope, there's always a way," Theo said. "Never talk defeat!" She proclaimed, putting her hand to her heart. "Use words like hope, belief, faith, victory." She turned and smiled though there was a hint of sadness in her weary face. "You can't give up before the battle's even started, that means they've won already."

Jack nodded, and the three made their way back down the beach to where the rest of the crew were now ready to go on their trek. They hadn't walked into the forest for long when they came across a disturbing sight; a body lying face down in the water. Barbossa tested the water, then spat it out. "Poison, foul by the body."

"Ey, I know him," Pintel said. "He was in Singapore!"

"Captain!"

"OI! We got company!"

Theo dashed back towards the beach, to see an unfamiliar ship approaching the Pearl. She turned to find a pistol aimed at her face, then glanced over to see Jack and Barbossa in a similar predicament. After a moment, Jack motioned to Barbossa. "He's the Captain."

**IV. **

Isa was more relieved than words could say when Theo was shoved back aboard the Pearl, followed by the rest of the shore party who were looking decidedly miffed at the sudden turn of events. She had recognised the ship immediately as the one from her vision and although she had told Will he did nothing. Instead, he and the remaining crew from Singapore had led a mutiny and then she knew; he was the one who had betrayed the crew to Sao Feng, whose ship that was. The Empress drew up alongside and the Pearl was instantly commandeered.

"Sao Feng," Barbossa said, as Jack hid behind him and Theo scuttled over to Isa. "You showing up here, 'tis truly a remarkable_coincidence_."

Sao Feng ignored Barbossa, "Jack Sparrow," he said and Jack popped out, smiling nervously. "You paid me great insult once."

"That doesn't sound like me."

Without warning, the pirate lord of Singapore punched Jack in the face, sending him backwards, holding his nose. Jack winced, then put his nose back in place. "Shall we just call it square, then?"

Will pushed his way through the crowd. "Release them," he said, pointing to the three girls. "They're not part of the bargain."

Isa thought her eardrums might implode when Elizabeth and Theo screamed, "What?!"

"What bargain be that?" Barbossa snarled.

"You heard Captain Turner, release her!" Sao Feng said, and Jack had to do a double-take.

"Captain_Turner_?"

"I need the Pearl to free my father; it's the only reason I came on this voyage..."

Theo looked so angry that if looks could kill, the world would have exploded. Once the cuffs were off she stomped towards him. "This is what you'd planned? Betraying us?" Will bit his tongue and swallowed the retort he had been on the verge of snapping.

Jack pouted. "He needs the Pearl. Captain Turner needs the Pearl. You," he said to Elizabeth, "felt guilty. And you and your Brethren court," he said to Barbossa. "Did no-one come to save me just because they _missed_ me?" A few crewmembers put up their hands, to which Jack gave a wink and a thumbs up. "I'm standing over there with them."

Sao Feng grabbed Jack's shoulder and pulled him back. "I'm sorry Jack, but there's an old friend who wants to see you first."

"I'm not certain I can survive any more visits from old friends."

He turned and motioned to the other side of the Pearl to where his own ship was, and in the distance they could see another ship approaching. "Here is your chance to find out."

"The Endeavour," Theo said with mild distaste. "Captain Shortypants is here to ruin the party."

There was an uncomfortable hush as the new ship approached, and when it finally drew up alongside the Pearl, a boarding bridge was laid across so an unbelievable number of naval officers could board. Beckett sauntered across the bridge and Isa made a point not to look at him.

"Well, what do we have here? So many double-crossing double-crossers, I'd be surprised if you still trusted one another," Beckett said, scanning the crowds. His eyes lingered on Isa and Theo for a fraction of a second longer but nobody seemed to notice.

"What are you going to do with us?"

"Patience, Miss Swann," he chided. "All will become apparent as and when it happens. We have business to attend to first." He looked at Will and Sao Feng, who both said nothing. "The Pearl," Beckett prompted. "Who is to take Captaincy of her?"

Both Will and Sao Feng started to speak at once.

"The Pearl was promised to me," Will snarled.

"Yes, and you were Captain," Sao Feng smirked. "Until I took the Pearl back from you."

Beckett sighed. "If you could get this done and dusted, I have a hanging or ten to attend."

"You little bint," Theo hissed, drawing her sword, but finding it blocked by something she wasn't expecting; Isa's sword. As they pushed back and parted blades Theo couldn't hide the confusion from her face, unable to form the question that was spinning around in her mind. Isa took a few steps back with her sword arm outstretched in front of her, threateningly.

"Sorry, Theo," she whispered.

"How could you- You're a pirate!"

"I was _never_ a pirate," Isa retaliated. "_You_ were; you were right at home doing this stuff but I wasn't."

Beckett stepped forwards so he was stood beside the young woman. "What course of action will you take, Admiral?"

Isa blinked, then looked at Beckett, who said nothing as he smiled in that smug way of his. She strengthened her resolve and turned to face the crew of the Pearl. "Throw them all in the brig, every last one."

At her word, the officers began to board Sao Feng's ship, enraging its captain. "We had a deal, Beckett!"

Beckett gave a curious stare. "You didn't honestly think that I'd stick to my word." He nodded to the officers, who began to round up the pirates. The crew of the Pearl had been thinned drastically during the voyage to the Locker, and since half of Sao Feng's crew made up for some of those numbers both ships were a little thin on the ground, and the possibility of a retaliation flew out the window.

"Sao Feng can stay with the Pearl," Isa said, "Since he's so desperate to keep his claws in it."

"Why?"

Isa looked at Theo, whose eyes were wide with shock and sadness. "'Why' what?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"I have my reasons," she said as the officers began to lead the pirates to the brigs.

But when everybody but Theo's backs were turned, she saw it, she was _sure_ she saw it, she wanted so badly to have seen it; a subtle wink in her direction from the newly appointed Admiral before she turned and following Beckett onto the Endeavour. And so no matter what her crewmates said, she would trust Isa, she refused to believe that her best friend would betray her.

She was believing, and hoping, and keeping the faith.


	12. Devious Plots

**A/N:** I think it's about time we had some sauce, kthx. ;D Also, I know Mercer was meant to be in this scene somewhere, but I can't help wandering how the hell he managed to get from the Endeavour (which, by the way, was BROKEN) to the Dutchman in like, record time, when the Endeavour was chasing the Pearl, which was going in the OPPOSITE DIRECTION TO THE EMPRESS. D: Did he catch a ride in the Tardis?! So yeah, right now he's on the Dutchman, not on the Endeavour. XD

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Twelve: Devious Plots**

**I. **

Isa set her teacup down onto its saucer, absentmindedly staring out of the cabin window at the Pearl which stood empty except for the two naval officers who were standing guard. When Beckett had led her back onto the Endeavour he had offered her some tea - and she wasn't one to refuse a good brew - and the two had sat, as they had done before all this had started, silently sharing a pot of tea. Isa assumed that he would want some sort of report of what had happened on the trip and her assumption was confirmed when he eventually spoke.

"So you went with them on their little trip, and you didn't tell them who you were."

It was more of a statement than a question, but Isa replied nevertheless. "We hardly had any choice, Mercer had the entire Naval presence in Singapore aiming their weapons at us." She lifted her cup to her lips again, grimacing slightly at the memory. "I doubt the pirates would have taken to us well if we'd walked up to them and said, 'oh hi, we're hired by Lord Beckett, but could we tag along anyway?'."

Beckett showed vague amusement at the sarcasm. "It was merely an observation, Admiral."

"You were serious about that?"

"Serious?"

"Making me Admiral."

"Indeed," he nodded his head towards the desk at the far end of the room. "Your uniform is waiting for you."

"My what?" Isa turned to look, and sure enough on the desk was a neatly folded Naval uniform. A sudden rush of nostalgia flooded through her, although the memory she was reliving wasn't from that long ago; it was of the moment the girls had left the uniforms they had been given before to travel to Singapore. They'd been through a lot during their journey and had grown as people, as _individuals_... in the process they had begun to grow apart and followed different paths.

Silently, she stood and walked over to the uniform, running her hand gently along one of the beautiful lapels studded with gleaming gold buttons. The material had that 'brand new' feeling about it; crisp, clean,_shiny_. She turned back to Beckett, clutching the uniform to her chest. "This is mine?"

He nodded.

"The colours are different to the standard uniform." Instead of the bright yellow and blue, her uniform was comprised of autumnal colours, browns, rust, deep green and maroon; it really was beautiful.

"I remember you mentioning you weren't particularly fond of them so I had them changed."

Isa blinked, hardly believing what he was saying. "You had a uniform with a totally different colour scheme made just for me?" He nodded again. Isa blushed and set the uniform back onto the desk before quickly making her way back to the table. "You do realise I haven't got the first idea about what the hell an Admiral actually does, right?"

"I had made that assumption, yes." He took a sip of his tea.

"...and you're making me Admiral. Some people would say you'd lost your mind."

"I daresay you'll learn quickly enough." He waited until Isa lifted her cup to her lips again before adding, "I want you to take command of the Pearl."

It was a good thing that they weren't sitting facing one another because Isa sprayed her mouthful of tea out, letting out an undignified gurgle whilst slamming the cup down, coughing to try and get tea out of her airway. A more suspicious mind would suspect that Beckett, who was trying to hide his chuckling with his own teacup, had waited until the 'right moment' to break the news. Isa had a more suspicious mind, but didn't broach the topic. "Me?"

"You."

"After saying that I don't know how to steer ships and do Admiral-y things."

"Yes."

"What if I sink it?"

"Unless you blow a hole in the hull, I doubt there's much you alone could do to sink the ship. There's reading material in the cabin for you to review before you try anything, and the crew can give you a helping hand."

"I assume you mean the officers, not the pirates."

"That, I do."

There was a knock at the door, and at Beckett's command the officer entered the room, giving each of its occupants a respectful nod before speaking. "Lord Beckett, one of the prisoners had something..." He held out the compass Isa had given to Jack.

"Ah, I believe that belongs to the Admiral."

Once the compass was handed back to Isa the guy left. Isa opened the compass and watched the pointer as it spun round and round, smiling sadly when the pointer came to a halt. It made her think of Theo, of the friendship she may just have obliterated to do what she had to do, of the times they had been able to rely on one another for anything, anytime. When Isa looked up from the compass she noticed Beckett staring at her. "What?"

"Regrets?"

"None at all."

"You betrayed your closest friend and know that you've condemned her to the hangman's noose and you have no regrets whatsoever?" He raised an eyebrow. "Knowing you as I do, I find that hard to believe."

Isa set the compass onto the table, resting her hand on top of it, thinking a while before answering. "I don't regret what I've done. I feel sorrow towards the fate that awaits those I've accompanied for the past weeks, and I feel sad that my friend may have to face the same... but I do not regret the path I have taken."

Beckett stood up and paced the room for a while before speaking again, "You don't regret that your path means your friend's death?" He stood behind Isa, looking out of the window.

She shook her head. "It's not my path that dictates her destiny; it's her own."

There was a short silence.

Without warning, Beckett leant down so that his lips were an inch from Isa's ear, placing one hand on her shoulder and the other over her hand, which was still resting on the compass. "And what did this point to?" He said softly, giving her hand a light squeeze as if to make it obvious what he was talking about.

The whisper sent shivers down Isa's spine. "I think you know that," she strained to reply, closing her eyes for a moment and willing herself to calm down, telling herself that this really isn't anything to get heart-eyes over and knowing that she was blatantly lying.

Isa slowly turned her head, feeling her blush deepen as she felt Beckett's lips lightly graze her cheek. She stared into his blue eyes, transfixed on her as opposed to the compass that was under her hand - _their_ hands - but after an all too brief moment he straightened up, leaving Isa with a familiar feeling of longing for the warmth of his hand over hers. He walked back around the table, taking his seat, still watching the young girl before him whose heart was going a mile a minute. Thankfully for her, he decided to change the subject, so she had something else to focus on.

"How about you tell me about the past few weeks?"

So Isa began her lengthy report about their travels between the time the two hard parted company to the present day, describing the places they went to and the troubles they faced as they travelled to the end of the world, falling off the edge into the unknown. She talked of how Jack had appeared aboard the Pearl, sailing along the sand before the ship met the water, and also of the barter she had made to get the girls aboard the last ship out of the Locker.

Beckett didn't say a word as he sat and listened, eyes fixed on Isa during the whole explanation, moving only to pour himself a fresh cup of tea.

**II.**

"I can't believe she betrayed us," Will muttered.

"I can't believe _you_ betrayed us," Elizabeth countered, holding the bars of the cell she was in, trying to catch a glimpse of the deck through the stairway.

"Him, I'm not particularly shocked about but _her_? I didn't suspect her as the type." Barbossa shook his head.

Theo said nothing. Ever since they'd been thrown into the brig the crew had done nothing but voice their displeasure at being put in this predicament, blaming everyone from Will to Beckett to Sao Feng to Jack, but in the end their fury had become focused on their ex-crewmate who had betrayed them all. Jack had been taken to the Endeavour to have some sort of discussion with Beckett, so attention had been drawn away from him and to Isa, the only one of them who wasn't under arrest. People love nothing more than to bitch about something they have in common, apparently. She wasn't feeling uncomfortable about it, but she wasn't prepared to join in, since she was still clinging to the hope that Isa had a plan.

Will turned to Theo. "You didn't know anything about this?"

"Does it look like I did?" Theo snapped.

"I don't know, you two are pretty close. You may have organised all of this."

"You think I'd do something like that?" She was still smarting from Will's betrayal, but her anger had abated a great deal. At least she was talking to him now.

"I wouldn't know," he replied. "There were a few things I didn't know about you, like you being under Beckett's pay."

"Oh you can talk. Remind me, who was it that led Beckett right to us? Hmm?" As the two turned away from each other with disgruntled noises, the rest of the prisoners all fell into an uneasy silence that was broken only by the occasional coughing from various crewmembers. Theo kicked at the cell door in frustration, fearing that if she didn't kick it, she may end up kicking Will. "Just don't talk smack about Isa when you're no better."

Will looked at Tia Dalma. "Even you didn't see this?"

"Like Barbossa, I did not see her as the type." She shook her head. "It makes no sense."

"Aye, well, perhaps we just aren't as good a judge of character as we thinks we are."

The voodoo priestess shook her head. "No, it's not that. She isn't the type to betray those she loves."

Will snorted. "Clearly you got that wrong."

Theo sighed. "Can we please change the subject?"

Gibbs decided it was safe to talk as he was in a separate cell to Theo. "Well, that traitorous cur is one of the bigger reasons we're all here."

"Oh dear," came a voice from the stairs. "That's quite hurtful."

There were more than a few icy glares for Isa as she descended the stairs, hands held behind her back to give her posture a more confident, arrogant feel. She sauntered between the cells, ignoring the harsh looks she was getting, smirking at the relative silence that had befallen at her presence. She stopped in front of Theo and tilted her head. "Why so glum, chum?"

Theo said nothing.

"Oh, come on, don't be like that." She took out a set of keys from her pocket, shaking her hand so that the keys jangled. "I just want to talk."

"We have nothing to talk about."

"I think you'll find we'll have plenty to discuss." Isa drew her sword as she turned the key in the lock, opening the cell door and waiting for her friend to walk out. Not being armed meant that everyone else was powerless to do anything, especially as Isa had her weapon out in case some have-a-go-hero decided to, well, have a go. So Theo stepped out of the cell and waited as Isa threw some cuffs on her and locked the door before pocketing the key. Theo Will exchanged worried looks before Isa led her up the stairs and to the cabin.

The deck was empty, not surprising really, since it was night, and Theo assumed that officers slept sometime. It struck her as slightly odd that there wasn't even _one_ officer but that wasn't her main priority right now.

Once they were in the cabin, Isa checked it out in case there was someone around, then gave a heavy sigh as she took out another key from her pocket and undid the cuffs on Theo's wrists. "Damn, I always thought it'd be fun bitchin' around the place."

Theo gave a gleeful squeak before throwing herself at her friend. "You love me! You _really_ love me!"

"I... think you're using that quote in the wrong context."

"Oh. Well whatever." She rubbed her wrists where the cuffs had been. "What was with the evil-ery? You had me really worried, you know."

Isa smiled. "Sorry about that. Someone had to be on this side of the fence to help you get out of this mess." She put the key back into her pocket and set her sword on the desk.

"Oh I see, you shrewd devil, you." Theo ribbed Isa. "So, you have a plan?"

"Absolutely. Someone has to cause a distraction aboard the Endeavour, and whilst the officers are busy attending to that, you take advantage of the chaos and get over to Sao Feng's ship and free the crew there. You then both sail away as fast as you possibly can."

"Awesome... but I don't have the keys."

"Well no. I do. This key," she held up the black key that she had used to unlock the cell earlier, "Is for the Pearl. This one," she held up a golden key, which had an ornate dragon wrapped around the handle, "Is for the Empress."

"Empress?"

"Sao Feng's ship."

"Right. Black key, Black Pearl. Gotcha. Come on, then," Theo said, heading towards the door whilst pocketing the keys. She turned around and realised Isa wasn't following her. "...come on."

"I'm not going with you." Isa looked as if the words had to be forced out of her mouth. "You have to go pretend this is your plan."

Theo snorted. "Like they'd believe that. More to the point, why?" Isa's silence spoke volumes, and the reason suddenly dawned upon Theo, who narrowed her eyes. "Him? You're abandoning us for him? You're choosing him over me? Isa, he wants us _dead_!"

Isa had no reply to that; she didn't know why she wasn't jumping at the chance to leave with Theo, to escape on the Pearl. Part of it was that she knew there was no way the crew of the Pearl would trust her, no matter what the plan had been, but part of it probably was that she didn't want to leave Beckett. Unable to give Theo a suitable answer, she deflected attention away from the subject. "I had another vision."

Theo's anger instantly dissipated, turning into concern. "About Beckett?"

"No... you remember way back when we met Admiral Norrington?" At Theo's nod, she continued. "You remember that story that was too long for him to tell us, then?" Another nod. "Well, it was pretty damn long."

"You saw it in your vision?"

"No, I found out about it all during the vision, though."

"Ah, your ninja-knowing powers of creepy?"

Isa nodded.

"Alright," Theo said, perching beside Isa on the edge of the desk. "Give me the cliff notes version."

"Well, Norrington used to be a Commodore. When Elizabeth was kidnapped by a bunch of zombie pirates who were cursed by Aztec gold-"

"Woah!" Theo held her hands up. "Did you just say 'zombie pirates'?"

"Yeah...?"

"That... is possibly the most _awesome_ thing I have _ever_ heard! But please, continue."

"...thanks. So yeah, Norrington goes off to rescue her and somehow someone manages to do so but now the zombie pirates-" Theo gave a gleeful shiver but Isa ignored her and went on, "-had Will. So Elizabeth says that if Norri rescues Will she'd marry the good Commodore." Theo gasped, and Isa nodded. "So Norri agrees, naturally, and some crazy shit goes down and Jack ends up almost getting hung, but not, because Will helps him to escape. Well, Norri_lets_ him escape, and Will gets Elizabeth."

Theo blinked. "Wait, what?"

"I know, don't even try. So then things are going fine until Norri sails his ship into a storm."

"...why?"

"Damned if I know. He loses his crew, his ship, his status and now he's got an arrest warrant over his head for letting Jack - a known pirate - escape, courtesy of Lord Beckett. So he becomes some bumbling drunk in Tortuga until who should come along? Captain Jack Sparrow, looking for able-bodied men for his crew, so after an epic bar fight which ends with Norri being tossed into a pig-sty, he joins the crew. Then some other stuff happens, blah blah blah, Norri ends up with the heart of Davy Jones and also Jack's compass whilst Jack gets NOM'd by the Kraken."

"So that's how he managed to get his glory back, then..." Theo looked impressed. "Though, how is this all relevant?"

"Well, Norrington was in my vision. He's aboard the Dutchman." Isa went on to describe her vision in great detail, leaving nothing out, especially when describing the crewman who killed Norrington, as well as the ship that was attached to the Dutchman. When she was finished, she fixed Theo with a grim stare. "You have to get aboard the Dutchman."

"What? How?"

"When you leave here, you have to leave on Sao Feng's ship."

"Again, how?"

"I don't know," Isa said, sighing. "I just know that you have to get on that ship."

Theo crossed her arms over her chest, giving a contemplative noise as she got up and paced around a little. "I'll do my best."

"Don't let him die," Isa said as the two locked eyes. "He doesn't deserve to die."

After a moment, Theo nodded. "So how are we getting out of this mess? You have a plan, right?"

"Of course," Isa gave a mischievous wink. She picked up her sword from the desk and held it out, holding the blade so the handle was pointing towards Theo. "You take this," she said, waiting for Theo as she nodded and took the blade. "Then you stab me and knock me out."

Theo stared. "...say what."

"Stab. Knock out."

"...why?"

"So it's convincing."

"Can't you just pretend to be unconscious?"

"Oh for God's sake. So what, you blew me over with your powers of awesome? I don't think Beckett would accept that as a viable excuse for losing the Pearl."

Theo looked let out a despondent sigh. "_I'd_ believe it."

Isa held her arms out beside her. "Have at it."

"Dude, isn't there any other way?"

"No."

"Fine..." She gripped the sword tightly. "Will we see each other again?"

Isa grinned. "Of course."

"Good... I'll need the chance to apologise when you're actually awake."

Before Isa had the chance to reply or react Theo swiped at her arm with the sword, leaving a deep gash, causing the injured girl to gasp and turn slightly, clutching her bleeding arm. Just as swiftly, Theo kicked the back of her knees so that the girl stumbled, making it easier for Theo to grab her hair and slam her friend's head into the edge of the table. Isa fell in a crumpled heap on the floor, alive but unconscious.

Theo winced. "Sorry, mate," she muttered. She was impressed to note that Isa's hair didn't seem out of place at all.

Turning her back on the fallen Admiral, she started making her way towards the door, opening it a little to see if anyone was about. Luckily they still seemed to be busy elsewhere so she was able to creep back down the stairs to the brig where everyone, upon seeing Theo alone, instantly knew something was up. Theo shushed everyone before explaining the plan.

Gibbs looked impressed. "So you stole the keys?"

Theo held the two keys up.

Pintel rattled the bars. "Then get us out of here!"

"Shush! Before that, we need a way to cause a distraction on the Endeavour." Theo pondered. "Needs to be something big that doesn't cause a terribly huge amount of damage..."

Elizabeth pointed to the pile of objects that was their effects. "There should be a grenade in there. Mostly flash with a little bang, but it might do the trick?"

"Excellent," Theo said, clapping her hands together before rooting through the mountain of objects to find the item in question. Eventually she found it and held it up for all to see. "...it's kinda small. But I guess big things come in small packages."

"Now will you let us out?"

"One more thing..." She turned to Sao Feng. "You have to help us."

Despite being under arrest and in danger of being hanged, he seemed to take his time considering the plan. "Why should I help you?"

"Apart from the fact that we could all die if you don't?"

"He means," Will said, disgusted, "What's in it for him?"

Sao Feng nodded, before turning to Theo, expectantly. She blinked. "Well, what do you expect me to say? 'We have milk and cookies'?" She made a face. "I mean, what the hell? We need your help or we all_die_."

"With Beckett there is always the chance to make a deal-"

"Uh huh. Yeah. I see how well that's served you so far."

Sao Feng frowned, knowing that the risk of trying to barter with Beckett was very, very high. Barbossa stepped forward. "Aye, 'tis a shame they're not bound to honour the code of the Brethren, ain't it? Because honour's a hard thing to come by, nowadays..." He stared pointedly at Will, but didn't say any more.

"There is no honour in remaining with the losing side."

"The losing side, you say?"

"They have the Dutchman, and now the Pearl. What do the Brethren have?!"

Barbossa stepped forward and lowered his voice, "They have... Calypso." His eyes shifted momentarily, and Sao Feng took a look in the direction, seemingly deep in thought.

Eventually he snickered. "Calypso. An old legend."

"No. The Goddess herself, bound in human form. Imagine, all the power of the seas brought to bear against our enemies. I intend to release her but for that, I need the Brethren Court." He motioned to the necklace Sao Feng was wearing. "All the Courts."

Sao Feng thought for a moment, then turned to look directly at Theo. "I want her."

Theo blinked. "What?"

Will grabbed the bars of the cell. "What?! No!"

"It's her, or no deal."

"Err, hello? 'Her' is stood in front of you." Theo pouted. "At least address me when you're speaking about me."

"Apologies," the Captain replied.

"Theo is not-"

"Oh stick a cork in it, Will," Theo sighed. "This is the only way."

"No, there has to be-"

Theo cut him off, making an irritated grunt and a 'close your mouth' motion with her hand. "It was your astoundingly brilliant ideas that got us into this pile of manure, Will. If this means we'll get out of this alive, then we go with it." She turned back to Sao Feng. "It's a deal. Though you realise you'll have to swim."

Sao Feng nodded. "I am prepared to do anything it takes to get back to my ship."

"Okiedokey!" She rubbed her hands together before taking the black key from her pocket and unlocking the door.

Theo began to make her way to the front of the crowd but found herself being pulled back by Will. "You can't do this," he whispered.

"Like I said, there's no other way." She smiled at the look of concern on his face. "Oh, chill, I'll be fine. I promise."

As the group crowded along the stairs Theo motioned for them to keep quiet, even though there still didn't seem to be anyone on the deck. She couldn't hear anything from the cabin either which probably meant Isa was still out cold. "Right," she said to the crew. "Once Elizabeth has thrown the grenade-"

Will looked unconvinced. "Shouldn't I do it?"

"Why? You probably throw like a girl. As I was saying," she continued, ignoring the scandalised look on Will's face, "Once she throws it and it goes off, Sao Feng and I will make our way to the Empress. During that time you make sure any naval officers around the place are disposed of in due course."

"What about Isaviel?"

"Throw her overboard, she needs to deliver a message for us." Theo looked grim. "That, and I want to deal with her myself at a later date. Once we've regained control of the ships we sail in opposite directions. The chances are, the Endeavour will chase the Pearl, and we know that the Peal can hold her own in a race."

"Wait, what about Jack?"

"He can do his own thang," Theo shrugged. "Keep the faith, dudes. Are we ready?"

Everyone nodded. Elizabeth crawled over to the side of the ship facing the Pearl as the rest of the crew went to deal with the few naval officers that were checking out the ship's stocks. Once everyone was in place, Theo gave the signal and Elizabeth threw the lit grenade over, watching it land by the main mast before ducking back down out of sight. Not even a minute later an ear-splitting explosion tore through the air, sending out a powerful shockwave that had all three ships rocking. Theo shot Elizabeth an accusatory look, mouthing the words 'a _little_ bang?!' - to which she got a 'what can I do?' shrug - before she and Sao Feng dived into the water and swam across to the Empress.

Just as Isa had predicted, all of the officers who were milling around on the Empress rushed to the Endeavour and began to flap around in panic as they tried to stop the mast from falling, allowing Theo and Sao Feng to reach the other ship and then slip below deck without being noticed.

**III. **

The explosion jerked Isa back to consciousness, and it took her a few seconds before she could remember what had happened. Her arm was hurting like a bitch, and the blood that had pooled on the carpet of the cabin explained why; the gash in her arm was pretty deep and very painful, but not anything that would pose any real danger to her life.

When she emerged from the cabin it was a scene of utter chaos, with people running all over the place, fighting on the two supposed prisoner ships whilst the majority of the officers were clambering all over the Endeavour, trying to put out the fire and keep the mast from falling any further. Isa felt a slight chill running through her at the knowledge that her plan had been a success, although the feeling was short-lived, because she soon found herself surrounded by familiar faces, with the remainder of those of Beckett's men assigned to the ship.

"You know, you're very lucky Theoli ain't here," Barbossa said, sword aimed for the young woman's throat.

"Is that so?"

"Aye, she wanted to deal with you herself, which means you get to leave this ship. Alive."

She shrugged. "I'll take what I can get." She then motioned to the men behind her to jump overboard, which they did without needing to be told twice. Isa fixed Barbossa with a stare. "Look after her." There was no need for a reply, so she joined her new comrades in the water, watching as the ship began to move away.

There was a cry from overhead. Isa looked up just in time to see Jack flying across the gap between the ships on a rope, literally throwing himself at the Pearl just before it sailed away, getting faster and faster. She was so shocked and confused that she nearly missed the rope being thrown down for her. When she eventually clambered onto the deck the fire had been put out and the mast had fallen completely, both ships had sailed off with all the captives and her arm hurt like hell from the salt water on her wound but she wasn't bothered too much.

At least she got Theo off and away. Now all she had to do was hope that Beckett bought her explanation of why this had all gone down.


	13. Keeping Promises

**A/N:** From hereon in, each alternating chapter section will follow each of the girls and their solo adventures. Things aboard the Pearl are pretty much known so will be assumed to be canon. XD

This will probablymaybe be my last update of 2007, so all of you reading this right now;  
_**hope you have a very merry Christmas, and best of wishes for the new year to come**_!  
83 Thank you so much for supporting my fic, it really means a lot!

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Thirteen: Keeping Promises **

**I. **

As expected, Beckett had been less than impressed about the way things had gone, not just because the two ships had gone but because it would take a while to get the Endeavour fixed up so that they could pursue the Pearl. His anger wasn't the loud, brash kind, that had him barking orders at anybody unlucky enough to cross his path; instead his cold, silent demeanour and the scowl on his face spoke volumes about how he felt and the officers aboard the ship knew better than to speak out of turn when he was in this sort of mood.

Isa had made a point of staying out of his way whilst she got patched up and then busied herself by helping to tend to the wounded, as well as organising jobs for everyone to stop them flapping about like headless chickens; they had to get things back up and running for them to be able to try and catch up to the Pearl, or they'd never make it to Shipwreck Island. Eventually there was nothing more to do and it was left to Isa to let Beckett know they were ready to proceed, in whichever direction he wanted to proceed in. So she was stood at the door to his cabin, fist hovering an inch from the wood, wondering if this was really such a great idea. With a small sigh, she knocked and waited for the command to enter.

Beckett was stood by the window, staring out at the now dark waters on which a hazy reflection of the moon could be seen. The objects in his room were still in disarray no doubt from when the reverberations of the explosion rocked the ship and no effort had been made by the Lord to pick up the pieces, which seemed odd to Isa who had him down as a bit of a neat-freak. After stepping into the room a little ways, she leant down and picked up a small model soldier, looking at the detail in the painting for a bit before putting it on the desk.

"Sir, we're ready to get going." He turned his head slightly at the sound of the voice, though not enough to see her, just enough to let her know he was listening. Taking his silence as a cue to keep going, she spoke again. "They don't know which direction to go. Well, they know the general direction, since the Dutchman is going after the Empress and the Pearl went that-a-way," she said, pointing in the general direction the Pearl had sailed off in, "But you know, specifics and stuff? No idea. It'd be kind of annoying if they went in the general direction and were off by a little, leaving us miles from where we're _meant_ to be." She was aware that she was rambling, mainly because his silence made her increasingly more nervous.

After a moment's awkward silence he turned. "How is your arm?"

Isa blinked. "Painful," she replied honestly, glancing at the bandaged wound and noting with dismay that said bandage had been soaked with blood, which was now further staining her already bloodstained shirt. It was a good thing she hadn't worn her shiny new uniform. "I'll try not to bleed all over your floor."

A slight smile played at the corners of his lips as he took slow, deliberate steps towards her. "I wonder," he said softly, as if he were thinking aloud more than talking to her. "How you came to be in such a position to have that wound inflicted on you."

_Show time_. Isa gritted her teeth, avoiding Beckett's gaze, which remained fixated on her as he stepped slowly towards her, continuing to speak in a thoughtful tone, "How, also, Theoli came to be in such a position to be able to inflict that wound."

Isa stayed silent for a while, thoughts whirling around in her head, trying to organise themselves in an orderly manner so that she could say something that would sound half convincing. "I..." She looked at the ground. "I wanted to give her one last chance. What you said about regrets... I just couldn't leave it like that." She hated lying, but needs must. "So I took her to the cabin and we talked." She gave what she hoped was a sad, forlorn looking smile, keeping her eyes focused on her shoes. "I really thought I was getting somewhere, you know? Apparently I thought wrong."

Beckett reached out and tilted her chin upwards slightly, so she was looking into his eyes. After lowering his hand, he motioned for her to continue with a short nod. Luckily from hereon in she only had to speak the truth, however halved it may be. "It's my fault, I lost you the Pearl and the Empress, as well as Jack-"

"And the compass," Beckett added.

"...the compass?" Her hand moved instinctively to the compass on her own belt.

He noticed. "No, not yours. The one I had. Jack took it before he made his death-defying leap onto the Pearl."

Isa wasn't actually surprised to learn that what she had seen wasn't just a figment of her imagination. Still, it was another thing she was responsible for. "Sorry."

"I'll need to use yours to find out heading."

She unhooked the compass from her belt and set it on the nearest flat surface, and as he took it she repeated, "Sorry."

Without a word, he swept past her, and only until she heard a light clink did she turn to see what he was doing; pouring two small glasses of _something_ for them to drink, probably - hopefully - something alcoholic. He walked back, holding one of the glasses out for her to take, which she did. In all honesty Isa felt like she needed a drink, so she took the glass gratefully. It didn't take her long to finish it.After another short silence and a top up of her drink, Isa decided to push for a response. "Are you... upset?"

Beckett raised an eyebrow. "I've just lost two ships, the crews of said ships all of whom are pirates and one of the only ways to track them and on top of that the Endeavour was nearly destroyed, and you want to know if I'm upset?"

"Well, when you put it like that..."

"Of course I'm upset," he started, finishing off his drink before setting his glass onto the table. "But it's not entirely aimed at you."

"It's not?" She sounded a little more hopeful than she'd have liked.

"It's not," he repeated.

"Are you sure?"

He walked towards her and gently took her hand in his, lifting it before softly pressing his lips against the back of her hand. After a few seconds he glanced up at the stunned looking girl, still holding her hand lightly by the fingertips in an almost caressing manner. "Have that wound seen to." He let go of her hand and walked past her and out of the cabin.

Isa stood in the same spot, staring at her hand, listening to the voices and footsteps of naval officers who began to work to get the ship moving in the direction their commander told them to go in. She grabbed the bottle and had a good few drinks to try and settle her nerves. She had no idea what it was about Beckett that set her heart all a-flutter, but he did it with astounding ease and effect, turning her into a gibbering wreck with just one kiss on the hand.

Then, for no reason, she noticed the state of the room again, and decided to tidy it up a little if not to take her mind off more pressing matters.

_Eh, my arm can wait,_ she mused, as she picked up the objects strewn across the carpet.

**II.**

Theoli, meanwhile, was busy being pampered upon the Empress at Sao Feng's orders. The crew had generally accepted her presence because of her daring rescue attempt plan that, thankfully, had succeeded; they couldn't really complain about a woman who had possibly just freed them from the hangman's noose, after all. Once they were a safe distance from the Endeavour she'd had a lavish meal made for her, after which some maids helped her into the beautiful outfit that the Captain had laid out for her.

They had just about finished helping her into the outfit when, from behind them, Sao Feng entered the room, speaking in his native tongue. Theo watched him as he walked through the doorway, still speaking, and stared until he finished at which point she furrowed her brow and said, "...what?"

He ignored the question and clapped twice in quick succession. The two maids bowed deeply before shuffling out of the room, leaving Theo and Sao Feng alone.

"By this time tomorrow we will arrive at Shipwreck Cove and you will be free..." He turned to look her directly in the eye. "Calypso."

"Oh my God, yeah," Theo said, fanning herself with her hand. "It's boiling, I'd kill for a Calypso right now." Sao Feng stared at her, questioningly. Theo glanced around shiftily. "...you don't mean the lovely, refreshing kind, do you?"

"No. I realise it must not be a name you fancy, out of the many that you have, but it is what we call you."

Theo finally caught on, and nearly laughed at the thought of being mistaken for a goddess, but decided to play along anyway. So she shrugged nonchalantly.

"The first Brethren Court bound you to human form, so the rule of the seas would belong to man and not-"

"To me," Theo finished, waving her hand dismissively. "I know, I was there."

Sao Feng nodded. "But one such as you should never be anything less than who you are."

"Which is why I'm currently bound to human form, and, you know, held captive and stuff," Theo snorted. "Dude, you're saying one thing and doing another thing entirely."

"The Brethren Court did not bind you for nothing," he replied, smirking. "But we can set you free... and we _will_ set you free."

Theo quirked an eyebrow, pacing around the room a little. "Something tells me it won't be _for_ free."

"All I offer is my desire..."

Theo stopped, then turned. "Dude, that's so wrong. I'm like, half your age."

"What?"

"My bound form looks half your age," she corrected.

"But you are as old as the seas," he purred, stepping towards her.

Theo stepped backwards quickly. "Well, yeah, but you don't really want an older woman, do you? I mean, I might be all... wrinkly."

"I will take that chance."

He began advancing on her much quicker than she could edge away, especially when she tripped on a footstool and landed on her backside. She was shuffling backwards when the wall of the cabin exploded, showering splintered wood all over the place to she had to cover her face to avoid getting anything in her eye. When things settled a little she looked around, but saw no sign of Sao Feng.

When she got to her feet, she heard a small cry from the far end of the room. Sao Feng was sat with his back against the half-destroyed wall, with a large chunk of wood through his abdomen. Theo had a strong stomach, but this was nearly too much for her; it was only the pathetic way he reached out to her and called her name that made her say with him.

"Kneel, please..."

She approached him, kneeling down beside the stricken man, not really knowing what to do. The sight of the foreign object protruding his chest made her sick but at the same time, morbid curiosity meant she was unable to look away. She could feel hot tears sting the back of her eyes, threatening to spill over. She watched as he ripped his necklace from his neck and held it out to her, hand shaking violently.

"With all nine pieces of eight... you will be free... Take it! You are Captain now..."

Theo held his hand instead, letting a tear fall as she gave the dying man the only bit of comfort she could.

"Go in my place to Shipwreck Cove... Forgive me, Calypso." With one last breath, the last signs of life left him, and he fell back against the wall. Theo wanted to curl up and hide, pretend it wasn't happening, pretend this man wasn't dying in front of her... but she knew she couldn't. As much as she wanted to cry she couldn't, because that would solve nothing. So she decided to honor his last request, however misguided it was, and fight for hew newly acquired crew.

Theo let his hand slip from hers as she gripped the necklace, standing slowly as Tai Huang ran down the stairs. He took one look at the scene before him and knew what had happened. The two ran out of the cabin onto the deck, where chaos reigned; a mixture of naval officers and crewmembers of the Dutchman were fighting with Sao Feng's - now Theo's - crew, mostly obliterating them if they made any move to oppose their arrest. Theo was immediately grabbed and a blade was pressed to her neck, warning her, daring her to move. She gave a frustrated grumble, glancing to Tai Huang who was in the same situation, and rolled her eyes as the two were dragged down the steps.

Norrington walked up to them. "Theoli?"

She blinked. "Do I know you?"

"We met a few weeks back at Port Royal."

"You'll need to be a little more specific than that, I'm afraid..."

"Norrington. James Norrington?"

"Oh!" She pointed. "I know you!"

"Well... yes."

"You're the one who-" She stopped and clamped a hand over her mouth because she was so very close to letting slip the reason she had been on the ship; the details of Isa's vision. She smiled. "Fancy seeing you here!"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm the Captain, no thanks to you lot."

"Captain?" Davy Jones sounded amused, though Theo couldn't really tell under all the tentacles.

"Tow the ship," Norrington snapped. "Put the prisoners in the brig; the captain shall have my quarters."

"No thanks," Theo replied, jovially. She motioned to those of her crew who were left alive. "I'd rather get to know my crew. Thanks all the same, though."

Norrington looked confused, which wasn't surprising since he had no idea of what had transpired not a day earlier. He was probably still under the assumption that she and Isa were both working under Lord Beckett, so her reaction to him was more than perplexing. She decided to set him straight. "I chose a side," she said, shrugging as she looked Norrington up and down. "As did Isa. As did Elizabeth."

"Elizabeth? She's safe?" He looked elated. "Her father will be overjoyed to know-"

"He's dead."

"What? No, he went back to England..."

Theo shook her head, smiling. "I suppose Lord Shortmaster 3000 told you that, did he? Governor Swann is dead, we watched him sail to the other side. Elizabeth had to watch her father die..." She looked down, remembering the night that she had spent comforting Elizabeth. "That was the moment I made my choice, but I guess you made yours a while ago."

She gave him one last look before being led down to the brig with the rest of the crew. The thought had crossed her mind that he may deserve to die if he stays with Beckett even after what he'd just heard, but it left her mind as quickly as it had entered; it wasn't her place to judge people. She had to get her Captain groove on and rouse some sort of morale because everyone was a little down in the dumps at being thrown into the brig. That, and their old captain was kind of dead.

They'd spent about an hour in the cell when Theo had a thought; Will's father was on board the Dutchman, was he not? So all she had to do was tell him she needed to get a message to Will and he'd probably help them out! ...maybe. So she set about trying to find 'Bootstrap' Bill Turner by having loud conversations with her confused crew, occasionally throwing in the word 'bootstrap' very, very loudly so that she could be totally incognito about her search.

"So," Theo tried again, speaking to a very tired Tai Huang. "What do you think of my new BOOTSTRAPS?"

"You've already asked me this, Captain."

"HA! You called me Captain!"

"Well... you are."

"BOOTSTRAP!"

"...what?"

"I said 'awesome'."

"No, you didn't."

"I really did. Maybe you need to sit down, Tai." She pushed him down onto one of the benches, looking concerned. "Get some rest."

"Bootstrap..." Theo whirled around, edging over to where the voice had come from. When she rounded the corner she saw a man, embedded in the wall of the ship, whose eyes fluttered open when she got near. "You know my name?"

Theo balked. _This_ was Will's dad? He wasn't exactly what she was expecting. "Erm, yeah... I know Will."

He looked confused.

"...you know, your son?"

"Oh! William!" He laughed, tearing himself from the wall. "He's alive?!"

"Um, yeah."

"He sent you to tell me he's coming to get me?"

"Not exactly-"

"He'll be coming soon!"

"Well, actually-"

"I can't believe he made it!"

"Well, he's _alive_, yes-"

"But wait..." He stopped, smile crumbling away. "No... he can't come. He won't come."

Theo blinked. "What?"

"He can't come..." He refused to give any further explanation, and skulked back to his Bootstrap-shaped hole in the wall, turning and fixing Theo with a woeful stare. "He won't come." He was taken back into the folds of the ship, closing his eyes as he settled in.

After a moment Theo glanced at her crewmates, who shrugged. "Um... Bootstrap?"

Bootstrap's eyes fluttered open again. "You know my name?"

Theo stared. "...um, no, sorry. Just, err, looking for my bootstraps." She walked away, laughing nervously, watching as the man's eyes closed again. This wasn't good; he was starting to become one with the ship and if that happened there was no saving him, no matter what they did. Theo knew that she had to get her arse in gear if she was to help Will to save his Dad.

They _had_ to get out of the cells.

**III.**

Isa watched as the men pulled another barrel from the waters, with another body attached to it. The gulls seemed to watch to have a go even after they had started to pull the body on board, so some of the officers around had to beat them off with their weapons to make sure they didn't get pecked at. Isa forced herself to watch and not take her eyes off the body as it was hauled onto the ship; this was after all, her fault, her plan had caused this man's death. She walked down the steps, having just changed into her uniform and done her hair up. Instead of the usual wigs that admirals had, she had opted to style her own rich brown hair into that style, with the cute curls on the side of her head and the rest pulled back into a ponytail tied with a big red bow. She'd begged Beckett not to make her wear the standard wig, her reason being that she didn't want white hair. Understandable, really.

Beckett held the bottle that was attached to the barrel, waiting as someone cut the rope on it before smashing the glass to get at the scrap of paper kept inside it. Isa looked over his shoulder as he unfolded the mark of the East India Trading Company.

"Sir." Lieutenant Greitzer squinted as he looked out across the horizon - Isa, whilst still having the title of Admiral, didn't want to be placed in charge of any ships for the foreseeable future, so technically, he was Beckett's second-in-command.

Across the water, in somewhat of a path, there were more crowds of seagulls crowding around more bodies attached to more barrels. There were two that the could see with the naked eye, probably more if it was what Isa thought it was, although why it would be what she thought she still didn't know.

"A breadcrumb trail," Beckett said. "And we're meant to follow.

"A betrayer among them? Or a trap?"

"A gambit, by a skilled opponent." Beckett folded the piece of paper in his hands, keeping his eye on the trail of bodies. "Adjust course, Lieutenant."

"Sir?"

"We can only hope to reach our destination before they run out of bodies."

Isa watched the exchange curiously, wondering why anybody aboard the Pearl would leave a 'trail of breadcrumbs' as Beckett put it. She had a shortlist of potential suspects but none of her theories for any of them held much water, especially not after the way they were treated when they'd seen Beckett last. Her mind soon found its way to Theo, wondering if she was doing alright, hoping that she was coping alright on the open seas. There were very few times the two of them had been apart for this length of time, and although both girls had coped alright they were far more comfortable working as a duo.

_We had no other choice._

"Worried?"

Isa sighed at Beckett's question. "Are you sure this will lead us to the Pearl?"

"I don't see how else these bodies could have appeared in the water."

"Fair point."

"I believe we've no need for this anymore," he said, holding the compass out to her.

"Thankyou." Isa hooked the compass onto her belt, then grabbed his sleeve when he made to walk past her. "What are you going to do when you get to Shipwreck Island? What if the Brethren fight back?"

He smiled coolly. "Then we will make sure the day ends with their extinction."

Isa watched his back as he returned to the cabin, still feeling the chill from his words, wondering how on Earth she and Theo will be able to stop this mess. They were both in very serious danger of losing their lives, and for the first time since they'd got there Isa was at a total and utter loss as to what to do; coasting along just wouldn't cut it anymore. She needed to think of some awesome plan soon, or they were toast.

**IV.**

The jangle of keys in the lock roused Theo from her nap and as she sat upright she wiped the trail of drool running down her chin with the back of her sleeve, blinking groggily. Once she got her bearings she realised that Norrington was stood at the cell looking as if he was waiting for a bus. "...what do you want?"

"Oh, I don't know," he replied, sarcastically. "Possible a house, a family, wife and kids, Jack Sparrow's head on a platter... Or perhaps you to hurry and move out of there. Come with me." Nobody moved, not really wanting to trust one of the uniforms who had thrown them in there in the first place. Norrington looked them exasperatedly. "Quickly!"

Theo gave a nod, and the crew started to make their way out of the cell as quickly and quietly as possible. Once the last crewmember was out, Theo followed, grinning at Norrington as she went. "Finally chosen the right side then, my lovely?"

He smiled back. "I've chosen, whether this is the right choice remains to be seen."

She rolled her eyes, letting out a dramatic sigh as the two made their way out. "Well, it's about bloody time. I knew there was hope for you all along."

"You didn't remember me until I reminded you."

"Clearly _not_ the point."

Once they were out, they had to shimmy along the ledge on the side of the ship to avoid being seen by the crew on deck and eventually they made their way to the back of the ship where the ropes attaching the Dutchman to the Empress was. Once they got there the prisoners began to make their way along those ropes, hurrying to get back to their ship as quickly as possible, before they were seen or some alarm was raised. Theo, who was last along the ledge, had Isa's words lingering in the back of her mind and steeled herself, preparing to do anything she could to stop Norrington's demise.She waited with Norrington as each of her crew left the Dutchman. "Do not go to Shipwreck Cove," he said, helping the last of the crew off the ship. "Beckett knows about the meeting of the Brethren Court, I fear there's a traitor among you."

"Well bugger me sideways," Theo said, looking mighty unimpressed. "That is so unmellow. Anyway, after you." She motioned to the rope, waiting expectantly.

"What?"

"You're coming with, now get moving." Theo was conscious of the time they'd spent there, and the chances of being noticed were growing rapidly. If she didn't get them both off the ship soon...

"Who goes there?" Bootstrap was looking down on them.

Theo winced. "Aw, dammit."

As he went back inside, no doubt to approach them, Norrington stepped in front of Theo. "Go," he said. "I'll hold them off."

"Oh hell no," Theo said, pushing the Admiral's back. "No, I made a promise not to let you die like this and I sure as hell won't risk getting the wrong end of Isa's temper."

He looked at her, confused, but didn't have time to question her as Bootstrap had already caught up to them. "No-one leaves the ship," he muttered.

Theo threw her hands up into the air. "The things I do for friendship!" She then stepped in front of Norrington and addressed Bootstrap. "Listen, mate, I know you're all 'part of the crew, part of the ship', but seriously. We have to go."

"Nobody leaves the ship."

"Theoli, just go! I will follow!"

"Oh bullshit. I've been told how this ends; you _die_."

"Please, you must go!"

"Oh, bugger it." Theo stepped forward, spinning as she flicked her leg out so that it made contact with Bootstrap's face in a perfect roundhouse kick to the head. Not even giving herself time to react or even pose for epic victory, she then grabbed Norrington's pistol from his hand, then took him by the lapels and all but shoved him off the ship and into the water before shooting the ropes that kept the two ships together.

"Well. That wasn't so hard."

As she leapt off and swam with Norrington and her crew towards what was now _her_ ship, she couldn't stop grinning, knowing how proud Isa would be that she'd kept this promise, knowing how affected her friend had been by it. Now all they had to do was get to Shipwreck Cove. No doubt Norrington will have a few words to say about that, but hey, at least he's alive.

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**Thanks for sticking with the fic this far! I hope you've enjoyed the ride. ;D Rest assured next year will bring plenty of updates, with things slowly beginning to draw towards a shocking conclusion! Well. Sort of shocking. Maybe not. **

**Merry Christmas, you lot. Stuff yourselves with turkey and mince pies and crash out in front of the TV to relax with your friends, family and other loved ones. 333 See y'all on the other side of 2007!**


	14. P A R T Why? Because I Gotta!

**A/N:** Happy New Year!!! Hope you all had an awesome Christmas and New Year however you spent it. Here's hoping this year brings you all the happiness in the world. :3

The fic shall now continue with an end in sight.

Just as a friendly reminder; Theo and Isa are split up, Theo is on the Empress with Sao Feng's crew and Norrington (;D he didn't die, no) and Isa is on the Endeavour with Beckett. I would also like to remind people that, in essence, Theo and Isa are Sues. XD So anybody who reviews saying that they're Sues... well, no shit.

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts. Also, Love Is In The Air is by John Paul Young, Hooked On A Feeling is by David Hasselhoff (omg, you need to youtube this), Backstreet's Back is by the Backstreet Boys (you know you loved them once XD) and Ooh, Aah, Just A Little Bit is by Gina G.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Fourteen: P-A-R-T-Why? Because I gotta!**

**I. **

"Have you had another vision of late?"

Isa turned her head slightly towards the owner of the voice, knowing full well who it was. "No," she replied, turning her eyes back to the open waters. "Not lately."

Beckett stood beside her and for a while neither said a word as they continued to watch the waters, reflecting the bright sunlight and the blue skies above. In all honesty, Isa had become more than a little worried about her lack of visions, since she was expecting to have at least one telling her how Theo was doing. She was terrified that something had gone wrong, that her request on her friend had caused something terrible to happen to her and if it had, it would be all her fault. When those thoughts ran through her mind, all Isa could do was keep faith and believe that Theo wouldn't be downed so easily. She most certainly couldn't talk to anybody about her concerns, and she went to extreme lengths to make sure Beckett was completely unaware of her innermost thoughts.

She had also been thinking hard about how they could sort this out with as little bloodshed as possible. Surely there was some sort of compromise that they could all reach where they could all sail the seas together?

"Is there no other way?" Beckett glanced at her. "I mean, to deal with pirates. Some sort of..." She chewed her lip a little. "Rehabilitation program? There's already been so much death, surely there's a way for us to avoid anymore."

"What makes you think that I want to avoid it?"

Isa started, then turned to face the man beside her. "Sir?"

"Piracy is against the law, which means all pirates are criminals." His gaze was still fixated on her, and for the first time since she came aboard the Endeavour she felt the coldness of his eyes, the contempt of his words, and it hurt her. He didn't seem to notice her shrinking back. "Criminals are dealt with accordingly. I do not make the laws, I merely uphold them."

"But surely you don't want to see these people die?"

"Why wouldn't I? The East India Trading Company will grow at an astounding rate once the seas are cleansed of this little problem." He turned away from her. "I would have thought you'd know that, Admiral. Don't you share the same vision?"

Was he testing her now? She didn't know, maybe this had all been some kind of test of loyalty, and her wavering now just gave her away. "I don't know what that vision is," she replied, honestly. "I just don't like seeing death."

"That's what got us into this mess. You not wanting to see any more death."

Isa glanced at her arm, still wrapped in bandage under her coat. "I know."

"You will have to choose a side once and for all," he said.

"I have."

"Have you?"

Isa looked him straight in the eye before answering, "Yes."

"Good. Remember that next time you get an attack of sympathy. You must realise that they brought this on themselves by leading the lives they've led. With them around, the EITC is suffering and I, nor the Crown, can stand by and let that happen."

"No, sir."

From behind them, Lieutenant Greitzer shouted, "Sir! There's one not too far off with two bodies- Wait, one of them is alive!" He looked up from his telescope. "What should we do?"

Beckett stalked over and held a hand out, waiting for the Lieutenant to hand him the telescope. After taking a look, he smirked. "Well, well, looks like we'll be playing host to young Mister Turner."

"What?" Isa took the telescope. "What the hell is he doing here?"

"He was probably found out."

"Found- Wait, _he_ was the snitch?" Isa looked at Beckett, telescope still held up at eye-level. She really shouldn't be that surprised, he did lead Beckett and Sao Feng right to them and got the two crews arrested. Still, if he'd been found out, why was he still alive?

"Indeed he was. Fish him out, I believe we'll have plenty to discuss over some tea."

**II. **

Theo sighed, irritably. "For the last time, Norriboy, we are going to Shipwreck Cove. That is final." She turned and began walking away, ignoring her crew who seemed to know what to do anyway. Norrington, looking less than happy, followed Theo relentlessly.

"Did you not listen to a word I just said? Beckett _knows_. He is going to kill you _all_."

Theo checked some ropes before shooting Norrington a bemused look. "I heard you the first thousand times, Jay-Jay." Giving the crewmember in charge of said ropes a pat on the back she kept walking, heading back to the helm.

Norrington wasn't giving in. "I'm grateful that you saved my life and all, but that's going to mean nothing if we go there."

"We have to fight."

He grabbed her shoulder. "For God's sake, listen to what you're saying-"

Theo smacked his hand away. "Listen to me, for a moment, will you? I am a pirate, they," she motioned to her crew with a sweep of her arm, "Are also pirates. You think that if we don't stand by the rest of the Brethren Court now that Beckett just won't bother looking for us?" She shook her head. "You know as well as I do that it doesn't matter when and where, he will, eventually, find us all. At least this way we know the where, and probably the when as well." Theo leant against the wheel. "Speaking sense always gives me headaches. Now, I will say this one more time just because you're pretty; we are going to shipwreck island, and I am going to wait for Isa there."

"What if Isa is betraying you?"

"She's not."

"How do you know?"

"Because I trust her with my life." Theo raised an eyebrow. "You met her once, does she seem like the type to betray? Do you think she'd think of this elaborate scheme if she was just going to betray us?" Okay, so asking him to recall a girl he'd met once was probably a long shot-

"No, she doesn't."

Theo blinked. "...wait, what?"

"She doesn't seem the type, you're right."

"You remember her?" Theo wasn't even bothering to hide her surprise.

"I do tend to remember people, unlike some," he stared pointedly at Theo. Upon realising his hint was going unnoticed, he cleared his throat and continued, "Especially if they happen to fall into my arms the first time we meet."

Theo watched him for a while, unblinking, and after a moment Norrington started getting nervous so he swayed side to side to see if she'd just fallen asleep with her eyes open again. When her eyes followed his movements he knew she was still alert, which only made it more creepy for him. Slowly, Theo's face broke out into an evil, evil looking grin. "Oooooooh, I get it."

"What?"

She twirled, grabbing the nearest crewmate to dance with. "Lurve is in the air," she sang as she danced, "Everywhere I look around!"

"Excuse me?" Norrington looked around. "What?"

She stopped dancing. "Oh, you prefer something more contemporary?" She was lost in thought for a few moments as Norrington tried to work out what the hell she was talking about. He was about to speak when she smacked her fist against her open palm. "Got it!" She began dancing around the deck again, like a loon, this time singing a different song. "I can't stop this feeeeeling, deep inside of me!" Twirl, twirl, pose. "Giiiirl you just don't realise, what you do to me!"

He finally caught on. "What- no! That isn't- I didn't-" He flapped a bit.

Theo stopped, leaning all the way backwards as her dancing partner supported her weight with his hand on the small of her back. She tilted her head, looking at the upside-down Norrington. "Oh_really_? Why are you going red?" She flipped herself upright, twirling once more before posing in an elegant, yet awesome way. She bowed at the small round of applause she received from her crew before walking over to Norrington, who was turning an interesting shade of purple.

"We've only met _once_," he said immediately, before Theo had a chance to speak. "Why would I have feelings for her if we've only met once?" He snorted at the incredulity of it all.

Theo still had that evil grin on her face. "Mm-hmm, and who exactly are you trying to convince here, eh? Actually, how _can_ you love her if you've only met once?"

He thought for a moment before answering. "Her eyes, they had such sadness behind them, but such life and..." He stopped, then turned his head slowly to look at Theo, who had the most lewd smirk on her face. "That was low."

She winked. "Oh Jamiekins." She sighed. "Pirate. Now, I do believe my work here is done." She walked off, chest puffed out with pride, leaving Norrington staring after her with a mixture of bemusement, scorn and embarrassment. Not a minute later she returned, walking backwards up the steps to where she was stood before she began her dancing. "Forgot, need to steer the ship."

**III. **

As hard as she tried to listen to the conversation between Will, Beckett and Jones, Isa found her concentration waning. From what she had heard from Jones the Empress had, once again, slipped from the grasp of the EITC and sailed off with Theo at its helm. The crew had said that Admiral Norrington had vanished and was presumed dead, though Isa refused to believe that; When Theo made a promise she never backed down for anyone or anything, least of all the pirates who held her captive.

She rubbed her brow, trying to concentrate on the conversation happening around her and finding herself hindered by queasiness. It hadn't been particularly long after Will had been dragged aboard that she had started to feel the familiar nausea and piercing headache of an incoming vision, and although she had tried her hardest to keep it at bay she didn't know how much longer she could do so. She most certainly didn't want it to happen around the three stooges, that was for sure.

"What else have you not told me?!" Jones seemed pretty miffed, though Isa couldn't really blame him. You think if you see someone eaten by the Kraken the chances of them coming back were slim to none, and then your boss neglects to tell you about it. Ooh, bad communications right there.

"There is an issue far more troublesome," Beckett said, skilfully avoiding the awkwardness of the previous topic by hopping to another entirely. "I believe you're familiar with a person called 'Calypso'?"

He recoiled as if he had been struck, twitching a little before replying. "Not a person, a heathen God. One who delights in cursing men with their wildest dreams and then revealing them to be hollow and naught but ash. The world is well rid of her."

Isa wasn't so sure; he was speaking as if he knew from first hand experience and from the look that Will gave her, he had noticed the same. He sipped his tea, continuing his smug charade. "Not quite so well, actually. The Brethren Court intends to release her."

"No! They cannot!"

"Technically, they can," Isa pondered aloud. "Since now they have Jack, all of the pirate lords can gather."

"The first court promised to imprison her forever, that was our agreement!"

"_Your_ agreement."

"I just showed them how to bind her; she could not be trusted. I- she gave me no choice. We must act before they release her-"

Will and Isa exchanged looks again before looking at Jones and speaking simultaneously, "You loved her."

Isa was mildly bewildered. "_She's_ the girl from your story? The one who left you on your one day on land?"

"She_pretended_ to love me!" Jones stomped over to the young girl, looking increasingly angry.

Isa grimaced. "So you betrayed her?"

"_She_ betrayed _me_!"

Will stood up with his teacup and saucer in his hand. "And after which betrayal did you cut out your heart, I wonder." Isa then had to duck pretty quickly to avoid getting a teacup and-or its contents in her face after Jones, in quite a petty show of irritation, smacked it away, angrily. Beckett glanced at the smashed cup, understandably not wanting to get in the middle of this bitch-fight.

"Do not test me," Jones said.

"I hadn't finished that."

Thus began an intense staring match, during which Isa crawled back into her seat after dusting herself off. "Err, guys? More pressing matters?"

"You will free my father," Will turned and walked past the captain, turning to look at Beckett. "And you will guarantee Theo's safety, along with my own."

Beckett raised an eyebrow, then glanced at Isa. She gave a light shrug. "Your terms are steep, Mister Turner," Beckett began, "We will expect fair value in return."

"There is only one price I will accept; Calypso murdered!"

Isa rolled her eyes as she took another sip of her tea; honestly, this whole ordeal was beginning to sound more dramatic than an American soap opera. Has anyone ever tried to uncross those ever-so-crossed wires there? Isa thinks not. Again with the communication problem.

"Calypso's aboard the Black Pearl, Jack has sailed the Pearl to Shipwreck Cove."

"And with you no longer aboard her, how do you propose to lead us there?"

Everyone stared at Will, who had been playing with some nautical instrument before it nearly took his eye out. He glanced about, noting that he was center of attention, then reached into his pocket as if he had just remembered something. "What is it you want most?"

Beckett smirked, taking the compass from Will. Isa watched the exchange. "So what, when we get there we just... wait?"

Will nodded to Isa. "What else do you suppose we do?"

"I dunno, send some kind of scout to lurk around and get some information? I figure you'd want some kind of information or something." Gosh, that sounded intellectual, perhaps the nausea was making her lose her brain cells.

"It's not like any of us are that inconspicuous, is it?"

Beckett held his cup close to his lips. "No, but if she stayed out of the way then it could work."

Isa nodded. "Exactly- wait. What?"

He chuckled. "I assumed you were volunteering."

"No! Well, yeah, maybe, but-"

"She could die on that island," Will interjected, much to Isa's surprise. "The pirates there aren't exactly her friends, especially with her now wearing that uniform."

Beckett gave an unconcerned shrug, lifting his cup and drinking what was left before setting it back onto the small table. He looked down on Isa, who had remained seated; she didn't trust herself to be able to remain steady at the moment. "You'd go, wouldn't you? For the company?" He leant in and lowered his voice, "For me?"

Isa nodded, pretty sure that he knew that he was, essentially, sending her to her death. Yes, she wanted to go and yes, she wanted to use the opportunity to find Theo, but she couldn't help feeling a little put out by Beckett's request. For one last time she shoved the nausea back so that she could prepare to travel to Shipwreck Island with Jones on the Dutchman, leaving Will with Beckett on board the Endeavour.

**IV. **

By the time Theo and Norrington had arrived on the Island, apparently every pirate ever had already arrived. Theo didn't seem at all phased by that, in fact she seemed more than a little happy at making a grand entrance.

"We're fashionably late, of course," she said to Norrington as they, and the crew, made their way down the long winding passageways to find the place where the Brethren Court was convening. Luckily for them it was all pretty much a one-way system so it wasn't long before Theo could hear more than a couple of familiar voices.

"Might I point out that we are still short one pirate lord, and I'm as content as a cucumber to wait until Sao Feng joins us."

"Yeah, sorry to burst that bubble," Theo said, waving to the crew of the Pearl who were stood by the edge of the circle that surrounded the table around which the pirate lords were gathered. "He won't be coming, mainly because he's dead. Dutchman got us."

There were loud cries of outrage and shock as the news slowly sunk in, and whilst that was going on, Theo sank her sword into the globe; not because she knew it was what you meant to do, mind, she just thought it was a really cool thing to do.

Jack grinned. "He made you captain!"

"Damn right!" Theo raised her hand in the air and Jack gave her a high-five.

Elizabeth looked happy at first, then confused when she noticed the uniformed man beside her. "James?"

"Elizabeth..."

"You were under the pay of Lord Beckett?" It suddenly dawned on Elizabeth how Beckett actually got the heart, why he was wearing the uniform, what she didn't know was why he was there with Theo.

Theo coughed. "So was I."

"Oh yes, good point."

"I'm sorry, about your father."

Elizabeth tensed up. "As am I."

"I didn't know."

"My father's death is not something I blame you for, James. There are plenty of other things to take that space."

Theo threw herself into the nearest chair and whistled to get everyone's attention. "Also, Beckett kinda knows where we all are, so I'm guessing he'll be here not too long from now."

"Who is this betrayer?"

"Not likely anyone among us."

Theo glanced around. Jack nudged her. "No, he's not among us."

"What of that man?"

Everyone turned to stare at Norrington, still in his Admiral jacket but mostly without the trimmings and shinies that his full uniform had. He took a step back with his hands raised, defensively, looking to Theo for assistance. "He's no traitor, he broke us out of the Dutchman. He's cool." Theo nodded to Norrington, who left the room for fear of being shot or stabbed.

The French pirate lord glowered. "How can you be sure?"

"Well, how can _I_ be sure _you_ didn't betray us, Frenchie?"

"How dare you!"

"Not nice when someone accuses you without any sound evidence, is it?" Theo snapped, finding her good humour dissolving incredibly quickly.

Barbossa stepped in before things got out of hand. "The issue isn't who betrayed us, the question is, what do we do now?"

"What, we're not going to fight? You know, show them how badass us pirates are?"

"Fight?" Frenchie laughed.

"Shipwreck Cove is a fortress, a well-supplied fortress!"

"So...we're going to sit here and play scrabble? How boring."

"There be a third course," Barbossa said, beginning to pace around the room.

Theo whispered to him as he passed by. "Dude, is this going to take long, you know how I get during long boring sessions of tedious yakking." She stepped back when she saw the look Barbossa was giving her. "Okay. Sorry. I was only _asking_. Sheesh."

"In another age," he began, "At this very spot, the first Brethren Court captured the Sea Goddess and bound her in her bones." He waited as the nods and murmurs of understanding spread through the crowd. "That was a mistake. Oh we tamed the seas for ourselves, aye, but opened the door to Beckett, and his ilk! Better were the days when mastery of the seas came not from bargains-"

"Dude, why don't you just say it? You want to free Calypso."

There was a silence that rang throughout the room as everyone stared at Theo, then at Barbossa. All at once everyone began shouting and arguing, opposing the very notion of releasing that which the first court had, with good reason, bound. Theo grimaced and blocked her ears a little, not particularly liking the shouting. After a few harsh exchanges a fight broke out at the far end of the table, and pretty soon the whole room, bar the crews of the Pearl and the Empress, were embroiled in a right epic punch-up with fists, bottles and swords being flung every which-way possible. Theo prodded Barbossa in the arm. "Shouldn't you do something about this?"

With an aggravated sigh he climbed atop the table to let off a warning round from his pistol. "It was the first court what imprisoned Calypso, we should be the ones to set her free! In her gratitude she will see fit to grant us boons."

Jack looked unimpressed. "Whose boons? Your boons?"

Theo snorted.

"Utterly deceptive twaddlespeak says I."

"If you have a better alternative, please, share."

"Cuttlefish."

Theo found her attention wandering - it wasn't like she hadn't warned them or anything - to thoughts of her friend Isa, and how she was doing. This was probably the longest the two had been apart since they'd first met, and it was quite a strange experience for her, not having Isa to inject some seriousness into the situation or to come up with one of her fiendishly smart plans. She hoped she had managed to convince Beckett about what had 'happened' for the two ships to get away. With Isa's gift of the gab she had no doubt that Beckett will have fallen for any line he was fed, but it was what the girl was going to do now that had Theo worried; how would Isa be able to get off the Endeavour? Would she even _want_ to? If Theo's suspicions about what the compass pointed to for her were true-

Her attention was jerked back to the court by another gunshot which actually hit a man this time. Everyone watched as the victim fell, then turned their heads in the direction the bullet came from, where stood a man in a dimly lit doorway. He blew she smoke from his gun barrel before saying, "The code is the law."

Theo stared as the man descended the stairs and headed to the table. "Oh my God. He is _so_ cool!"

"You're in my way, boy."

Jack shuffled sideways and out of the way. Teague motioned for the code to be brought forward, and two old men heaved a large book to the table, gently placing it on top of the remains of the impromptu fight from not long ago. He then whistled and a dog trotted forward with the keys, much to the bewilderment of various Pearl crewmembers. The book was opened and after a moment was spent scanning a few pages Teague stopped. "Ah, Barbossa is right."

"Hang on a minute..." Jack pushed past the other man. Jack muttered to himself a little before giving a sniff. "Fancy that."

"There hasn't been a king since the first Court, and that's not likely to change."

"What? Why?" Theo looked at Gibbs and Barbossa, waiting for an explanation.

"The pirate king is elected by popular vote."

"Each pirate only ever votes for hisself."

"Ooh. Well yeah, that would make sense. _I'd_ vote for me."

"I call for a vote," Jack chirped. Everyone groaned and generally began making a fuss about the whole ordeal before the lords began voting. Theo, who wasn't really paying much attention and was focused on Teague playing the guitar, had to be elbowed rather harshly by Barbossa as a friendly reminder that she had to do so. "OW! Gawd damn, I vote for Theo, jeez."

Everyone looked to Jack for the last vote, fully expecting him to also vote for himself. Apparently they were all mistaken. "Captain Theo."

"...bzuh?"

"I vote for Theo."

"You do?"

He nodded. "I do!"

"Well, king me," Theo said, still surprised.

The other lords all began shouting at Jack, yelling at him to vote for them instead of Theo. Jack blinked, looking and sounding as innocent as he could. "Am I to understand that you lot will _not_ be keeping to the code, then?"

There was a loud twang as Teague snapped his guitar string, slowly looking up at the scene from his chair far in the corner, glowering at anybody who dares to oppose the 'law'. There was a nervous laughter from somewhere among the crowd as everyone lowered themselves back into their chairs, offering nervous apologetic smiles.

"Very well, what say you, Captain Theo?"

Theo pondered, rubbing the imaginary beard on her chin. "You say this place is pretty well protected, eh?"

Mistress Ching nodded.

"And we have plenty of supplies?"

Again, she nodded.

"Well then. I say we have ourselves a damn good partay, baybeh!"

**V. **

As fortified and protected as they claimed Shipwreck Cove to be, Isa had found it surprisingly easy to get in; all it took was a few gold coins here and a flash of leg there and hey presto, she was in! Though really, it was dreadful security; she'd have to have a word with someone about that. In hindsight, it may have been pretty stupid to go to a pirate gathering wearing the uniform of, oh, _only their worst enemy in the world right now_, but there was little she could do now. All she could do was to take out the curls from her hair and put it back in the style it was in before her promotion.

She ducked out of sight as two pirates passed, heading back towards where the ships were docked. It had been surprisingly quiet for a gathering of every pirate ever, but she assumed they were all in a different area of the Cove, namely; the taverns and bars. Once the coast was clear she began to walk along, inching along with her back to the walls and crouching low when passing windows. She was on her knees peering around the next corner when from behind her came a voice.

"Isaviel?"

She started, then realised the voice was quite familiar. "Norri?" She gave a happy squeak before throwing her arms around the man, who just about managed to stop the both of them from falling over. "Theo did it!"

"She did," he said, smiling. "If you're referring to preventing my death, that is."

"I was, and yay!" She gave a gleeful clap then hastily unclung herself from the Admiral. "So Theo's okay too?"

"Very much so."

"Thank God."

The two fell into an awkward silence. It was quite bizarre that two Admirals were stood at Shipwreck Cove where, to all intents and purposes, their enemies were. What Isa had decided back on the Endeavour was that yes, she had decided on a side but it wasn't the one Beckett was thinking she had chosen; there was no way she would ever choose a side that opposes the one Theo was on. Of course, she was a filthy liar, so he didn't know any of this.

She laughed at herself, getting a strange look from the man beside her. "Sorry, just thinking about what Beckett's going to say."

"He knows you've-"

"No, heavens no, I wouldn't be alive if he knew. He just sent me on some reconnaissance mission to try and find out what the Brethren were up to. All I do is stay out of sight, as if I'd actually get back from this 'mission'." She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, sure."

Norrington furrowed his brow. "So why did he send you?"

"As an example? As some sort of.. I dunno, distraction?" She shrugged. "I can't think of any non-crazy reason."

"Perhaps he didn't expect you to actually get inside."

"Probably, I heard this place was meant to be really well protected."

"How_did_ you get in?"

"I had some Theoisms up my sleeve," she snickered. "So what about you? Are you sure you want to be on _this_ side? I mean, what with the effort you put into getting back to the top..."

"Even if I didn't, I doubt now's the best time to change my mind. No, there's no honour in betraying those whom you profess to protect." He looked at the ground. "Even if you claim ignorance to the betrayal."

"Governor Swann?"

He nodded, slowly raising his head to look at her. "I truly didn't know."

Isa gave a short sigh, casting her mind back to the day they had all found out that Elizabeth's father had died at the hand of Lord Beckett, how Elizabeth had cried until she had no more tears left. She started to continue along her path and Norrington fell into step beside her. "I know," she replied eventually.

"I don't know if Elizabeth could ever forgive me. Nor should she."

"Why not? It's not like _you_ killed him."

"I didn't try to stop it from happening." He looked pained, guilt-ridden, sad.

"Have you spoken to Elizabeth?"

"Not properly, though I did see her at the Brethren Court." He nodded towards a set of doors at the end of their path. "I wasn't about to stick around when the rest of them realised who I used to work for."

"Did she seem angry? Bitter? Was she reaching for a sharp, pointy object to stab you with?"

"...no."

"Then I doubt she blames you."

"But-"

"Listen," Isa stopped and turned to face her walking-buddy. "I understand the guilt, really I do, but you can't take on the responsibility of something you had no power to prevent. So you made a few wonky decisions in the past, who hasn't?" She reached up and gripped his shoulder lightly. "Don't let it rule you, Elizabeth hasn't. Channel the guilt and anger," she continued, turning and motioning to nothing in particular in a very Theo-esque manner. "Use it for constructive thinking. Like Theo... sometimes considers doing." Norrington chuckled, much to Isa's delight. "There we go. Now come on, we should get Theo before she starts a riot or something."

As the two approached the doors that led to the chamber they could hear something strange... Isa squinted, concentrating on trying to remember where she'd heard the sound before; it was really very familiar, but she couldn't for the life of her place what exactly the tune was. Whatever it was, it was giving her a strange knot in her stomach, some strange sense of foreboding and doom. She pushed the doors open to be met with a wall of sound, all the pirates singing, led by a very loud Theo who had even taught them all the proper dance routine.

"EVERY PIRATE NOW!"

"YAARRRRRR!"

"ROCK YOUR BOOTY NOW!"

"YAARRRRRR!"

"EVERY PIRATE NOW! ROCK, YOUR, BRETHREN RIGHT! PIRATES BACK, ALRIGHT!"

Isa slammed the door shut. She then turned and started making her way back the way the two of them had come, only to find Norrington in her way. "Where are you going?"

She smiled. "To hang myself," she chirped, ducking past Norrington to try and keep walking.

Unfortunately for her he grabbed her shoulders and pulled her back. "Don't you think that you're being a little overly dramatic? I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for whatever that was." He grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards the doors and pushed them open to hear an entirely different song being performed, but again, led by Theo who now had a bottle in her hand as she danced atop the large table in the middle of the room.

"C'mon everybody! Sing along!" Thus began a drunken group performance of 'Ooh, Arr, Jes' A Wee Bit'.

Norrington closed the door and stared silently at the it, unsure of how to react next; he opted to turn and begin walking away. Isa laughed and grabbed his arm. "Oh no, you're not leaving me to face that lot on my own."

The door opened and Theo popped her head out. Upon seeing the couple her face lit up, bouncing out of the doorway and flinging herself at Isa in much the same way Isa had done to Norrington. "I _thought_ it was you I saw! You're alive!"

"Likewise," Isa said, smiling. Now that Theo wasn't singing and dancing on tabletops Isa allowed herself the relief of seeing her friend alive and well, if not slightly inebriated. "I see you're... having a party? Strange timing."

"We're having a party to commemorate my coronation!"

"Your... what?"

"My coronation! I'm KING."

"You're king."

"Yes. Pirate King THEONIDAS!" She posed as she shouted loudly, holding the bottle above her head in some sort of victory stance.

Isa gawked. "They made you pirate king?"

"I know, madness, isn't it?"

"Madness?"

"THIS. IS. PIRACY!" Another pose.

Isa snorted, though unable to hide the grin on her face. "Seriously? They made you king?!"

"Yeah, I felt as shocked as you sound," Theo snickered. "Jack voted for me instead of himself, which was really mad. But yeah, since apparently this place is nigh-on impenetrable we're having a party- Wait, how did _you_ get in?"

"Being sneaky and bribing people, of course." She smirked. "How else?"

Theo sniffled, wiping away a pretend tear. "I'm so proud of my Isa."

Whatever Isa was going to say never came out of her mouth because the nausea and headache that had subsided earlier came back with full force, causing her to stumble unsteadily; she knew her time was up and, whether she liked it or not, she was going to have to face whatever images the future wanted to show her. She staggered backwards into Norrington, clinging to his arm when he raised it to steady her and when eventually her knees buckled and gave way he caught her as he had done the last time they'd met; the _first_ time they'd met. The last thing Isa would remember before blacking out was Theo dropping the bottle of rum as she rushed forward, and the muted sound of smashing glass.

Then everything went dark once more.


	15. Long Overdue

**A/N:** So it's been a while since I last updated; sorry about that! Hope you're all still reading this and that you didn't give up on me! Anyways, the story is pretty much coming to a close soon, only a few more chapters to go. It's a pretty sad thought actually, because I do love this fic so much. Alas, all good things must come to an end, non? Either way, it's still a little way off so we can have some fun in the meantime. ;D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Fifteen: Long Overdue**

**I. **

When Isa woke up she began coughing, gasping for breath as if she'd been deprived of oxygen until then, gripping Norrington's arm as he supported her weight. He was kneeling beside her and holding her in case she rolled out of his grasp and smacked her head on a rock and sat on the floor across from him was Theo, flailing because she didn't really know what she could do to help, finally deciding to grab hold of Isa's hand in a silent show of solidarity and support. The next few anxious minutes were spent doing whatever they could to calm her down, trying to make her see that whatever she had experienced in her vision was over now.

When she had recovered enough to do so Isa spoke, voice hoarse and raspy. "Ugh, never want to do that again."

Theo smirked. "Good to know. Though I hope you realise I probably had like, five heart-attacks in the space of ten minutes."

"I'm pretty sure you'd be dead if that was the case," Isa returned with a weak smile. With the help of Norrington, who had remained silent, she sat up and crossed her legs, rubbing her temples with her fingertips as she felt her headache ebb away as it normally did. When he was sure that she wouldn't lean and fall onto her side Norrington let go of her shoulders, shifting so that he was facing her.

"Are you alright?"

Isa smiled, already feeling better. "I will be, thank you."

"Do me a favour," Theo said, motioning to the doors behind them. "Let the others know what happened. We're going to take a walk."

Isa blinked. "We are?"

"Of course. You need to shake off those vision-blues, baby." Theo stood up and dusted her knees off before holding her hands out for Isa to take, pulling her friend to her feet when she did. Norrington nodded and headed for the Court as Theo led Isa in the opposite direction, walking slowly so that her still unsteady friend could grab her arm if she lost balance. When Theo was sure nobody was within earshot she stopped, motioning for Isa to sit on a nearby crate. "So, what did you see?"

"I... I saw the end."

"The end?"

"How this was all meant to end. Who comes out on top, so to speak." She closed her eyes, leaning back so her back was against the wall. "Abridged version again?"

"Hit me with it."

"Tia Dalma is actually the goddess Calypso-"

Theo gasped. "No way."

"Way. So the goons in there decide to release her after swapping Jack for Will when they meet up with Beckett, and they decide that it's the only way to guarantee that they win against the shitload of Navy ships out there. Will the dumbass-"

"Hey!"

"No, really. He tells Calypso that the one-" She glanced around before leaning in, lowering her voice. "He told her that the person who betrayed her and trapped her in human bonds is her one true love, who, by the way, is the wonderful Captain of the Dutchman."

"Dude, Calypso was Jones' true wub?" Theo looked horrified. "Freaky."

"Yeah, so then Calypso's so pissed she wants to kick everyone's ass, which totally backfires on them all, and results in a one-on-one battle between the Dutchman and Pearl in the middle of a maelstrom that the Goddess created. Some wild shit happens, people die, people get married, then Jones dies and Will is made captain of the Dutchman. Then the maelstrom dies down and the Dutchman, now captained by Will, and the Pearl go and obliterate the Endeavour, killing Beckett, causing the rest of the armada to flee."

Theo nodded, making noises of deep contemplation. "You know, I'm pretty sure it was more epic than the way you described it just now."

"You wanted the abridged version!"

"Well yeah, but I'd want to hear about any awesome that you saw!"

"Dude, it was all death and destruction; that is not awesome at all."

Theo snorted. "The only one who died was Beckett and his homies."

Isa pursed her lips. "I don't want him to die."

"Say again?"

"I don't want him to die. I want us to stop it."

"Isa..."

"We did it before! You saved Norri!" Isa jumped off the crate and grabbed Theo's sleeve, voice filled with expectation and hope. "We have to try, right?"

Theo frowned. "No, Isa." She winced at the look of hurt on her friend's face. "It's not that I don't think we could, it's just... Norri knew he was wrong, he wanted to help and would have died because he was on our side. Beckett... he will never, ever want to change sides and wouldn't believe anyone who told him he would die if he didn't."

Isa flopped back onto the crate, knowing that Theo was speaking sense for one extremely rare moment of her life, and for the first time Isa didn't know what to do or how to feel. "But..."

"Listen..." Theo sat down onto the crate beside Isa, draping her arm across her shoulders. "I know you think you love Beckett or something and I have to admit he's a charmer, but I reckon it's more of the idea of changing him that you love; that somehow you can save him from this path to destruction and you can live happily sailing under a pirate flag... Think though, if _he_ loved _you_, would he want you to choose between him and your friend? Would he want you to come here when the risk of you losing your life was so high?" She shook her head. "You know his only love is the EITC."

Isa sighed. "I know you're right... which is a pretty scary thing for me to say."

"I know, right?" Theo looked impressed. "I surprised myself with that Dr Phil trash I just prattled off. I say it because I care, though. I know that he was what your heart desired most and all-"

"Wait, what?"

"The compass; it points to him, right?"

Isa stared at Theo for a moment before breaking out into a grin. She reached for her belt and unclipped the compass, holding it out in the palm of her hand. "What does it point to for you?" Theo quirked an eyebrow, not really understanding but taking the compass anyway. She watched as the needle span round and round before coming to a slow stop.

"Well, shit."

"Hmm?"

"It's pointing at you."

"Damn right, home."

"So yours-"

"Points to you, yes. Bros before hoes and all that," Isa said, winking, holding up her fist.

"Werd up, yo." Theo tapped her knuckled against Isa's. "Although, wouldn't it be hoes before bros for us?"

"Huh. Good point."

"So, what do we do now?"

"I have no idea. We have to face them, but..."

"Ooh, I have an idea!"

The strange feeling of dread in the pit of Isa's stomach returned but considering Theo's current mindset of 'wise sage' she decided to give her the benefit of the doubt; who knows, Theo's idea could be the awesome saving grace!

"We wait here and do nothing!"

Or not.

Isa stared. "What?"

"This place is meant to be impenetrable, right? We just wait here and hope they go home because we won't go out to play." Theo puffed her chest out with pride.

"...so what, we're going to kill them with impatience?"

"Yes. Yes we are."

"...let's just go talk to the others, shall we?" They stood up and headed back towards the court. Just before opening the doors Theo had a thought.

"Oh, wait."

"What?"

She laughed, nervously. "I kinda didn't tell them about our devious plan... so they might try and kill you when they see you, especially since you're wearing that uniform which, by the way, is made of awesome."

"Oh, bloody wonderful."

**II.**

Theo hadn't been wrong in second-guessing the actions of her crew and fellow pirates, only being able to explain the situation by threatening various people with beheading and/or a bullet in the kneecap. They were still very, very wary of Isa and her intentions, and she suspected it had something to do with the uniform so, as heartbreaking as it was for Theo to see such hotness go up in flames, Isa got back into her pirate gear and burnt the uniform. It wouldn't win them over but it was a start.

Upon voting, the pirates had decided to try out Theo's plan and spend the next few days waiting to see if Beckett and company would try to blast their way into the Cove. In the meantime, they would party and drink and generally arse about and have fun until they were forced to get serious. Theo wasn't exactly the best choice of King for those who wanted to fight the good fight, but at least they were all having a good time.

So, during the night of one of Theo's wild raves, Isa found herself standing at a window that was high enough to give her a lookout across the ocean where she could just about make out a few ships dotted along the horizon. It was so hard to believe that not a few months ago she was leading a relatively normal life, working a regular (ish) job and going about her business without much drama, but now look at her; she had been a pirate, an Admiral, and was about to face possible death, probably injury and definite battle. She wasn't stupid enough to think she was safe because they'd survived up until then; she was well aware that she might die, and possibly never return home... not that she was even sure she wanted to go home, if she was given the choice to. She was pretty sure Theo would want to stay and Isa sure as hell wouldn't go home without her. Besides, it wasn't so bad here.

Her thoughts were interrupted when someone joined her, leaning against the sill beside her. She glanced over and smiled. "Hey James."

He nodded, returning the smile, then looking out at what Isa had been staring at moments earlier. "Ominous, isn't it?"

"Yeah..." The sight gave her chills, and not the good kind, either. "At least we have time to move further into the Island's defences if they decide to move."

"We can't run forever."

"No," she agreed. "We can't."

"Lord Beckett won't give up until we're all dead."

"Nope. Bit of a depressing thought, but nope." She shivered. The next thing she knew, Norrington had put his coat over her shoulders, though not the coat from his uniform since he had also changed into more pirate-like clothing; a worn shirt, slacks, boots and some other bits and pieces. He looked at her with a sheepish smile on his face. "Wouldn't want you to catch a cold."

She smiled. "Thank you."

He blushed a little and refocused his attention onto the horizon. Isa, still smiling, could still feel the warmth of its previous wearer as she wrapped the coat tightly around herself for more warmth, going back to looking out at the horizon, which had started to lighten slightly, signifying the coming of a new dawn.

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**So, long time no see! This is a little short, given the size of previous updates, but that's probably because the girls aren't separated now, so there's no need for different sections for each of them. Expect more Theo-esque shenanigans in the coming chapters as they fill time before eventually going out to fight the EITC!**


	16. Message In A Bottle

**A/N:** So I've been out of the game so long I don't really have much confidence in my writing, and unfortunately this story was kinda left on the shelf because of this. I'll be trying to make a real effort to update both this and the other SSM fic, because I really want to get them both going again, but I think my mojo died. :/ Sorry for the long wait, people! If any of my loyal readers are still here, I can't apologise enough. And I can't thank you enough for still being around. -hearts-

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Sixteen: Message In A Bottle**

**I. **

Isa groaned at the sudden thumping music that woke her from her restful slumber, and for a short moment she felt as if she was at home, ready to stomp on the floor to let the people in the flat below her know that the music wasn't appreciated before she stomped downstairs to give them a piece of her mind. Then she realised that she wasn't in her lovely, fluffy bed at home but on a bed of straw with the remnants of an old sail thrown over her for warmth. As she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes she vaguely recognised the loud music as the first chorus of some Muse song.

For the past two weeks they had remained in the Cove to see what the armada waiting for them would do whilst the pirates kicked back and relaxed, quite confident in the strength of their defences. To alleviate the boredom, King Theo had taken it upon herself to declare a state of party, whereby everyone was to party their little hearts out during the time they had to kill. The first song of the morning was just Theo's way of declaring that the day's partying was to commence; it was like her gong. In a short space of time Theo had not only managed to teach the pirates numerous songs from 'modern times', but also managed to teach them STOMP-esque techniques, using objects around them as instruments and stomping on the ground to create the 'bass line'. Hell, she'd even started to organise some sort of mock X-Factor-come-American-Idol contest where the pirates would make bands and compete with one another. That should be interesting.

Ordinarily, Isa would just sit at the sidelines and watch the shenanigans with slight amusement, occasionally singing along when they started singing a song that she actually liked. This particular day, however, she was nursing an exceptionally bad hangover, no doubt brought on by the fact that she got absolutely plastered last night after having given up trying to convince Theo that staying here forever isn't the best idea in the world. No, according to Theo it totally was the most awesome idea in the world, so there was no chance of leaving anytime soon. So Isa took the _'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em'_ school of thought, drinking so much she might actually have gone momentarily blind.

She groaned and pushed herself up into a sitting position, squeezing her temples to try and drive off the sudden wave of nausea that tried to flatten her. She couldn't remember what she'd done last night, the hangover making the events turn into one blurry blob on her memory as it thundered away inside her skull which felt like there were a hundred-thousand ants inside doing a STOMP routine of their own.

_I just hope I didn't do anything stupid and or embarrassing,_ Isa mused, getting to her feet and having to hold onto the wall while her body caught up with the action. She unsteadily made her way to the door from where the music was coming from, seeking the good King herself to see what was on the cards for the day.

She didn't need to wait long, because practically as soon as she reached the door Theo bounded out, throwing her arms out and yelling, "ISA, ol' buddy ol' pal!"

Isa grimaced and leaned away, letting the ringing in her ears subside before attempting to speak. "Ow."

"Oh, right, hangover? Yeah, you were _really_ knocking them back last night." She sniffled, wiping away a mock tear. "So proud..."

Isa groaned. "Feel like crap."

"Well yes, that's what hangovers are like. One sec," she said, holding her finger up in a 'wait here' gesture before dashing off, only to return minutes later with a plate of food and a large tankard filled with water. "Best way to cure a hangover, they say. They being the pirates, and dude, they should know." She thrust the plate into Isa's hands, tapping her foot impatiently until Isa finally relented and began to gnaw on a piece of bread.

She nibbled a little more then decided to focus on drinking the water, instead, unsure if her stomach could take the food right now. "Did I do anything stupid?"

Theo snorted, then clamped her hand over her mouth. "Um. No?"

"...what did I do?"

Her gaze darted around, shiftily, looking at everything except Isa. "Listen, dawg, how's 'bout we just go talk about this plan you had..."

"...dude. Don't be trippin'."

"I ain't trippin' home. I just know you, and I know you'll flip. Like a ninja."

Isa took a deep breath. "Just hit me with it."

Theo hesitated. "Well, if you're sure..."

"I am."

Theo pointed over Isa's shoulder back to the straw bed she'd woken up on which should have been vacant after she'd gotten up and out... except it kind of wasn't. Isa blinked at the still half-asleep form of Norrington sprawled on the other side of the bed, staring as if the image wasn't actually penetrating her brain. She turned back to Theo, then looked back to Norrington, then back at Theo again, mouth goldfishing all the while. Eventually she managed to squeak, "What the hell did I do?" She clamped her hands on Theo's shoulders and shook her, her judgement and thought processes momentarily clouded by utter panic. "Theo, tell me what I did!"

"Hey, hey, hey! What am I, a maraca? Stop with the shaking, already!" She swatted Isa's hands away. "Chillax, you're both fully dressed, it's not like some Maury moment. God, can you imagine being on Maury needing a paternity tes-" She stopped after catching sight of Isa's expression and then cleared her throat. "Sorry."

Isa took deep breaths to regain control. Actually, why _was_ she panicking so much? Like Theo said, it wasn't like the situation could possibly lead to a Maury moment...

"You only got up on the bar together and started a rousing chorus of 'Hoist The Colours'. It moved many a-pirate to tears."

"...what."

"A fight broke out last night during the partay, and everyone started to get involved cause we'd all had a little too much juice, y'know? But then you two were like 'shove this', and totally just got up onto the bar and sang Hoist The Colours. Everyone was all so drunk by then that they just went along with it and forgot what they were fighting about anyway." Theo sighed, happily. "Good times."

Isa quirked an eyebrow. "And where were you during all of this?"

"With Teague, getting guitar lessons."

"Naturally."

"Hey, I can't control what the pirates do."

"You could have stopped me from making a plonker of myself," Isa grumbled, drinking the rest of the water from her tankard.

Theo grinned. "Where'd be the fun of that?"

"Charming," Isa said, pretending to be angry but betrayed by the grin on her face. The two went to the nearest tavern to get more water for Isa, talking about the extent of Isa's 'activities' the night before. It turns out that other than the sing-along nothing of much significance had happened, at least not that Theo or any other pirates had noticed, and after their song had finished they collapsed on the floor and fell asleep.

As the hours rolled by, and Isa took on the fluid that her body needed, the hangover dissipated and eventually vanished, leaving its victim able to breathe without it hurting her head to do so. Theo took the opportunity to talk to Isa about their current predicament, apparently finally admitting that no, this wasn't exactly the best situation in the world.

"So what, _now_ you're listening to me?" Isa bit a chunk out of the loaf of bread she rejected earlier, this time having made it into a lovely sandwich.

Theo looked sad. "Well, yeah. As much as I love partying here, we're-" She stopped, then glanced around to make sure nobody was listening, lowering her voice anyway before she continued. "We're nearly out of the um-ray."

"Oh jeez. Seriously? I thought we had enough to last ages?"

"For pirates, two weeks is enough to demolish a two month supply of alcohol." Theo sighed, staring into her tankard as she swirled the water inside. "We have to go out there, which means facing them. You know, I'm really surprised that Beckett and his crew stayed. Don't they need to restock or, y'know, bathe?" She grimaced at the thoughts that comment brought up, shuddering to try and get rid of them.

Isa rolled her eyes. "I can only assume that they got other ships to bring any essential stuff. As for bathing... well. I wouldn't want to comment." The two snickered away for a moment. "Anyway," Isa continued, "Let's assume that they're out there, with their God knows how many ships, which, to be quite honest, we couldn't beat with brute strength."

Theo picked at her bread roll. "Right."

"And they're waiting for us to appear so that they can launch their attack on us."

"Right."

"Beckett will not be interested in any sort of deal... or rather, he won't be interested in upholding his end of any sort of deal-"

"Which is kinda why he dies, right?"

"Right," Isa nodded. "So trying to bargain with him is a really stupid-ass thing to do."

Theo nodded, too. "But you said that Jones visited Calypso sometime ago - or rather, we let it happen before we brought her into the cove - and he'd said he would do anything for her... except Will kind of scuppered that plan by pissing her off."

Isa sighed. "Yeah. If we could somehow get both Jones and Calypso on board-"

Theo snorted. "I see what you did there... sorry. Please continue."

"...as I was saying, if we could have them both on side, we could cause some serious damage without really doing anything. The strength of their army is basically in the Dutchman." Isa grimaced. "But trying to get the two of them to understand the other's point of view will not be easy, especially when one's half crab and the other's a goddess."

"We can only try, right?"

"Right... but how do we get them in the same place together?"

"Simple. Talk to Calypso."

Isa looked worried. "Will it work?"

"Like I said, we can only try. Besides, she doesn't have her powers back yet, so she can't zap us with her uberskills. Maybe she won't be as pissed at us if we take her food."

Isa snorted. "Can't hurt, I guess. I'd suggest we don't take too many other people with us, if any at all. On second thoughts, I think it might be best if it was just the two of us that went, just so she doesn't feel any angrier at being confronted by so many people."

"Good idea. Shall we?"

"Yes, my King, we shall."

**II. **

Needless to say, Calypso wasn't particularly happy at them even being there, let alone at the information they had to bring her. Since they'd let her in on the identity of the person who'd betrayed her and let slip how to bind her in human bonds, she'd sat on the bench and glowered at the girls, at first not believing their words but then coming to the slow realisation that it all made sense. No matter what the girls said, she did nothing but hiss at them. Literally.

After about a half hour Isa gave a heavy sigh and stood up from her seated position, approaching the bars. "You're pissed, we get it, but will you at least listen to what we have to say?" She didn't hiss this time, which was good. She wasn't looking at her either, though. "I'll take that as my cue to continue." She glared at Theo to stop her from making the 'poet' remark, then began to talk again. "So we know you're angry that Jones betrayed you, but let's look at what precipitated this behaviour, shall we?"

Theo stood up. "He's spent ten years ferrying souls across literally the other side of the world, because you asked him to. He took the job because he loved you with all his heart."

"Then, on his one day off out of ten years-"

"Which, by the way, is a pretty rotten deal anyway-"

"You ditched him!"

Calypso pursed her lips before slowly turning to the girls, showing more than a hint of guilt in her eyes. "I..."

"Yeah, yeah," Theo said with a dismissive flick of her wrist. "We get the whole 'you wanted to remain the unpredictable little rascal Goddess he fell in love with', but dude, it was his _one day_!"

Isa gave a light shrug, offering a sympathetic smile. "Don't you think that him waiting for you said everything you should have known about how he felt?"

Calypso got up from the bench and grasped the steel bars. "You don't think it didn't hurt me not to meet him on him one day? I wanted to see him, to touch him..." Her gaze fell to the wooden floor of the prison area. "But I didn't want him to think I had changed." Then, as if she suddenly remembered something her head snapped up, this time with a look of rage in her eyes as the scowl returned. "But he betrayed me!"

"Like you betrayed him."

"This kind of tit-for-tat thing is really not healthy for a relationship," Theo said. "Dr Phil would not take this shit, I tell you. He'd tell you that you both need to take ownership of the damage you've each brought to this relationship and learn to deal with your emotions in a better, more manageable way before it causes your union to just crumble."

The other two women blinked and stared.

"What?"

"Dude, that was... remarkably sensible advice."

"Hey, I do pay attention to the master, y'know."

"Right..." Isa turned back to Calypso, giving Theo a sideways glance. "Anyway. She's right. You can either keep being pissed about it, or try and get it sorted out. I assume you still love him?"

Calypso looked conflicted. She was angry, but even a Goddess can't turn off her feelings towards someone else like a tap, especially if she's been holding said feelings for goodness knows how long. On the other hand, he _had_ betrayed her in one of the biggest ways that he could possibly think of by getting her bound to human form. She sat down and turned her head away, seemingly not decided either way.

Theo gave an irritated grunt, pushing herself up from the bench. "Well we're getting him, and we're sorting this bloody problem between you because this is ridiculous."

"He will kill you."

"Yeah well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it." She stomped off, leaving Isa to say goodbye to Calypso before scurrying after her friend, confused at the sudden mood swing. Upon questioning, Theo threw her hands up into the air. "Stubborn! The both of them!"

"...Theo, they kind of have valid reasons to be pissed."

"Have you learned nothing from Jeremy Kyle? Being angry doesn't solve_anything_, least of all relationship woes. You either look forward or just leave it be, but looking back all the time just means misery." The two walked back to the bar they had been talking in before visiting Calypso. Before sitting back at her seat, Theo snatched a bottle of rum from the bar, taking a swig before throwing herself into a chair. "You'd think they'd work this all out, being older and wiser and all."

"Yeah, well, I guess it's easier for someone from the outside to poke and prod. Anyway, how exactly do you intend to get Davy Jones here without trying to kill or obliterate us in some way?"

Theo tapped her fingernails on the tabletop for a while as the two girls tried to think of a way to do just that. Isa couldn't think of anything that didn't put anybody in mortal danger, and wasn't putting too much faith in Theo coming up with a-

"I have a plan!" She slammed her fist onto the table, then winced and shook her hand. "Wait here." She got up and scurried out of the bar, which was starting to fill with other pirates now. Most of them seemed to know who Isa was, and greeted her with words of pride and joy about the song last night, which Isa actually had little to no recollection of. She managed to smile and offer some bashful thanks, which seemed to appease them somewhat. About five minutes later Theo returned with a piece of paper clutched tightly in her hand. "Come with me," she said, grabbing the bottle and leaving again, this time with Isa in tow.

"What are you plotting?"

"You'll see!"

The two quickwalked down to the dock area of the cove to the point farthest out from their safe haven, at which point Theo uncorked the bottle in her hand and emptied it into the water around them, making sure there were no pirates around at the time. She then rolled up the piece of paper, shoved it in the bottle and corked it, turning to Isa and holding it up with pride shining from her grinning little face.

Isa stared. "...a note... in a bottle?"

"Yes! Genius, if I do say so myself."

"You... you're going to send him a note in a bottle."

"Yes. Yes I am."

"Dude, how do you even know he'll get it? What if Beckett gets it?"

Theo waved, nonchalantly. "Oh, trust me, this _always _works. I always got notes like this in Animal Crossing." She nodded, sagely. Isa could only facepalm, at which Theo lifted her hand, palm out. "King."

"Oh, fine."

Theo threw the bottle as hard as she could, and it travelled pretty far out before landing with a _plop_ into the water and began to travel out to the open sea. The girls watched the bottle for a while before it went out of sight, then they began to make their way back to the tavern. Isa had no idea whether the bottle thing would work but quite frankly she had no better ideas anyway, and besides, things had gone well for them so far so this had a higher than normal chance of working.

Probably.


	17. Reconciliation

**A/N:** Another update, and so soon! Although it's a little short, this one. Well, actually, this probably could have been stuck on the end of the last chapter, but I liked there the last one ended. Anyway, my ending will be completely different to canon ending. XD Just because I like to mess with canon, lolz. If you don't like it, then I'm sorry, but this was my intention all along. Anyways, the fic is really coming to an end now. Hopefully it won't take me as long to write it as it took to write the past two chapters. ;D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Seventeen: Reconciliation**

**I. **

"Well, I'll be damned." Isa could hardly believe her eyes, because, stood right in front of her was Davy Jones himself, in all his crabby, tentacle-y glory.

Theo gave a proud huff, nudging Isa in the arm with her elbow. "Told you so."

Jones, however, looked less than pleased at being there. "What is it that you want with me?"

"Well for a start, you need to follow us before someone sees you." Isa looked around to make sure nobody was around to scream like a little girl at the sight of the one Captain they feared above all else before leading him towards where they were keeping Calypso, bound in human form. Theo had managed to organise some big party that apparently all the pirates were now attending, having been lured with the promises of partygames and copious amounts of rum. In actuality the rum they were now drinking was bordering on the last of their supplies, so Isa hoped that they were enjoying it.

As she rounded the corner to the stairs she walked into someone, and was prevented from falling backwards by strong hands that held her arms. "Isa, there you are!"

Isa's eyes widened. "James, why aren't you at the party?"

He smiled. "I could say the same for-" His gaze went over her shoulder to the person stood behind, wondering what the hold-up was, and his eyes began to widen as well. Before he could make another sound, Isa put her hand over his mouth and dragged him down to the cells, quickly followed by Jones, who was being prodded by Theoli. When Isa finally took her hand away from Norrington's face - or rather, when it was swatted it away - he looked at each of the three of them in utter disbelief.

"Are you _mad_?"

"Actually-"

"You do know who he is?"

"Well, of course we-"

"You brought him HERE?"

"Technically we didn't-"

"You don't think he's going to try and kill you?!"

Isa rolled her eyes. "Well he hasn't yet."

"No, he's waiting for the right opportunity to get rid of the leader of the pirates, the two people who could probably lead us into war." He ignored protests from both Isa and Theo, who were trying to explain their little plan. Jones remained stood beside Theo, watching the exchange with mild amusement, making an odd bubbling noise every so often but not doing anything else. Sometimes Theo thought he caught the captain sneak a glance towards the end of the cells where Calypso was waiting, obviously also listening to this rather heated exchange between Norrington and Isa. Shrugging, Theo tugged on Jones' sleeve and motioned in that general direction, leading him down towards the far cell and letting the bitchfight continue uninterrupted.

"So what," Isa went on, suddenly irritated. "You're not even going to listen to what I have to say?"

"Not if it's something as ridiculous as 'I brought the captain of the Dutchman into this supposedly impenetrable fortress! It somewhat defeats the object of this place being impenetrable if you're inviting the enemy over for tea!"

"Okay, I get that you're kind of confused but seriously, we have a plan. You'll hear about it if you shut up for a moment, yeesh." She grabbed a nearby bread roll from a plate that Theo had brought with her earlier and shoved it into Norrington's mouth to signify the end of the discussion, then span him and shooed him down to where Theo, Jones and Calypso were all already deep in discussion. Isa turned to Norrington and put a finger to her lips, then motioned to the conversation. Looking somewhat disgruntled he complied, gnawing on the bread roll as he took a seat on a nearby bench.

"You betrayed me!" Jones spat, literally.

"I thought you forgave me for my past mistakes," Calypso said, voice level, eyes narrowed. "And it also should be pointed out that _you_ betrayed _me_."

"Because you weren't there. My one day, the one day I had been looking forward to for ten years!"

For a moment Isa saw a hint of something in Calypso's eyes. Hurt? Guilt? She didn't know, but it was gone as quickly as it had come, replaced by the same steely expression from before. "You had me bound to this form, when you know how much torture it would be... _has been_ for me!"

"Just right for a charlatan such as you, toying with dreams and desires as you have done..."

Theo held her hands up. "TIME OUT. TIME. OUT." She crossed her arms over her chest. "How many times are we going to go over and over the same point? You," she said to Calypso, "were wrong to not meet him, yes?"

After a moment's hesitation, she nodded, slowly.

"You," Theo said, turning to Jones, "were wrong to then retaliate like a little child throwing his toys out the pram, yes?" He grimaced and said nothing. Theo kicked him in the shin and he lurched to one side, clutching his leg with a tentacle before straightening up and turning on the girl, who just held her hand up to him. "I asked you a question. What you did was done out of spite and bitterness, yes?"

Still grimacing, the captain nodded. Norrington was now watching, open-mouthed and unable to believe what he was actually seeing, knowing that he wouldn't have believed it had he not been there to see it with his own eyes. In all honesty, Isa was pretty surprised too. This was a feud that had been going on for who knows how long, and was something that Beckett had managed to cash in on, but stick Pirate King Theonidas in the mix and things were getting sorted out faster than you could say 'marriage guidance'. She _so_ needs her own daytime show.

She whirled to face Calypso again. "You still love him, yes?" Everyone watched for her reaction. After a moment she, again, gave a slow nod. The question was posed to Jones, who turned his back to her and didn't reply.

Isa silently motioned to Calypso to get her locked out, which she did, and when she opened it a soft, gentle melody filled the room. "If you don't still love her, why do you still carry yours around with you like a second heart?"

"You ripped your heart out because it hurt, and probably still hurts. Why? Because you still love her. Duh." Theo tapped him on the shoulder. "You know, the sooner you admit it the sooner you can get rid of the hurt and pain. It has to get tiring lugging all that angst about all the time, right?" She nudged him. "Right?"

Isa shrugged. "You can leave if you like; go back to being Beckett's lapdog, doing whatever he wants you to do when he tells you to do it. But if you do go back, you _will_ die."

He turned to look at her, amusement eyes glinting with amusement. "Oh aye? Will you be the one to deal the final blow?"

"No, but there'll be nobody there to protect you," she said, matter-of-factly, glancing in Calypso's direction. The bound goddess had remained silent, no longer even holding her anger anymore but looking tired, possibly because the limitations of her human form, probably because of the current situation.

Theo stuck her bottom lip out, pouting slightly. "Can't y'all just kiss and make up? Seriously, it'll make life a whole lot better, and the whole war thing a whole lot easier."

Isa nodded. "It's true."

Jones narrowed his eyes. "So that's why you brought me here?"

"Well, duh."

Calypso stood from her seated position and walked over to the bars, gripping the rusting metal with one hand and slipping the other through the gaps, reaching out for him. After a moment spent staring he reached for her with his tentacle-arm, letting it curl around her arm in a protective manner as the two locked gazes. Then, to the others' surprise he began to change, and turn back into a man. The two lovebirds didn't really seem to notice, though, busy as they were staring into each other's eyes.

Theo cleared her throat. "Dude, this may be really, really awkward, but we're going to need him all tentacle-y again."

**II. **

"Say it."

"No."

"Go on, say it."

"I will not."

"You know you want to."

"I most certainly don't."

"Saaaay iiiiiiit."

Isa sighed, elbow resting on the bar, propping up her face. Theo was currently trying her damndest to try and get Norrington to admit what a brilliant plan it was, and how awesomely executed it had been, even with some unforeseen interruptions. He, however, was having none of it, for obvious reasons. She waved at them, interrupting the argument. "Can we move onto more pressing matters, please?"

"Oh, right. Beckett."

Norrington looked at each of them curiously. "What exactly is your plan concerning him?"

"You'll see," Theo said, then cackled, insanely.

Isa rolled her eyes. Beckett won't know what hit him.

Poor sod.


	18. Showdown

**A/N:** A little longer than the last two updates, and this has some meat on it! A little romance, a little angst, and more than a dose of crack for good measure! I thought I'd bring back a little of that randomness from those earlier chapters that seemed to peter out through the course of the fic. Hope y'all enjoy this! 

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Eighteen: Showdown**

**I. **

They were to meet their adversary, face to face. 

It had been decided when they had gathered all the pirates to all their ships to face what they knew would be insane numbers of ships under the flag of the East India Trading Company, there to obliterate any and all pirates. They'd all gone out there, roaring and hyped up, ready to go to war... until that is, the sheer scale of their opponent had come into view, at which point the pirates' alcohol induced bravado seemed to vanish quicker than you could say "yarrr". Somehow Theo had managed to calm them down and bring them around to the idea of keeping faith as Isa had gone below deck to sort out the things they were going to take when their inevitable meeting with Beckett went ahead. 

She wasn't really sure what went on the list of 'things to take to a meeting with your enemy whom you were sure you were in love with', but she gathered a few general bits and pieces together for when they decided to go. Top of _that_ list was weapons. As she rifled through the small cupboard-like space below deck where they kept various weapons aboard the Pearl, Isa heard footsteps and assumed that Theo was done working the crowd. Not looking back, she tossed her holstered pistol over her head. "Do me a favour and put that on the crate there, would you?"

The voice that replied wasn't Theo's. "Some warning that you were throwing a loaded weapon would have been appreciated." 

She was so surprised to hear the voice that she jerked upright, unfortunately hindered by the top of the cupboard which she struck her head against, letting out a long string of curses as she wound her neck in and turned around. "James? What are you doing here?"

Norrington smiled but said nothing about Isa's less than happy expression, putting the pistol she had tossed over on the crate as she had asked. "Theo's idea to try and get 'team morale' up is to get everybody doing the limbo dance."

Isa snorted. "That doesn't surprise me in the least. Not joining in?" 

"I'm not nearly drunk enough," he said, glancing up at the ceiling when roars of encouragement and laughter grew louder, apparently egging on their fellow limbo dancers. "Besides, I wanted to speak with you."

"Oh?" She turned to replace some of the weapons she had cast aside in order to find their own. 

"I don't want you to go and see Beckett."

She stopped in her tracks. Slowly, she turned to face Norrington again. "...say again?"

He stepped forward, closing the gap between the two. "I mean it, I don't want you to go."

"Why would that be?"

"Beckett is a shrewd man who would have no qualms about betraying you and any trust that you place in him, meeting him will only put yourself in danger," he said, voice even. "He's also far more intelligent than the pirates seem to give him credit for."

She sighed, picking up sword after sword and tossing them back into the cubby-hole. "James, _they_ may underestimate him but _we_ most certainly do not. You know our plan-"

"And he probably does too, if he's half as smart as we know he is. You're not going."

"Oh, I'm not, am I?" She straightened up and set the sword in her hand onto the nearest crate with a loud thump. 

"I'll go in your stead."

"I'm not letting Theo go out alone."

"Then I'm going with you."

"You'll do no such thing," Isa snapped, snatching the sword back and throwing it with a little more force than she intended, sending it clattering to the far corner instead of its intended target. She gave an irritated sigh, turning to face him once more. "Why is this such a problem with you?"

He looked mildly surprised at that, and seemed to be lost for words for a moment or two. "You... don't remember?"

"What?"

"I told you, the other night."

"...you've lost me." 

There was an awkward silence punctuated only by the occasional thump of someone falling over which was closely followed by an 'aww' as those around him consoled their fallen comrade. Something was niggling at the back of Isa's mind, as if she'd forgotten something that was actually really, really important; the kind of thing you'd physically kick yourself for forgetting. Wait. He doesn't mean the other night, as in the night she'd gotten so blindingly drunk that she didn't remember what had happened? She wracked her brain, trying desperately to grab any fragments of conversation they might have had before. Because she'd assumed nothing of much significance had actually happened she didn't bother trying to remember, but now that she _was_, things were slowly coming back to her. 

She caught sight of the look on Norrington's face and offered a sheepish grin. "Be with you in a second."

Turning her back, she continued to try and unravel That Night, slowly piecing together what she could remember. She remembered leaving Theo, feeling more than a little irate that she was refusing to see the sense in ending things, to go out and face their enemy. She'd made a beeline straight for the bar, where she had met up with Norrington... or rather, he was already there and she's just joined him. It was from that early point that things started to get fuzzy. There had definitely been a conversation, and from what little she could recall it had been pretty serious... Norrington had paid for her drink and she'd accepted and the two began to talk, mostly about their feelings on the whole 'being on the pirate side' thing, but then he'd said that he had something important to say to her. What was it? It was on the tip of her tongue...

"I love you."

That _was it! ...wait._

Isa turned slowly to look at Norrington again, who was looking right back at her, staring intently. She didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to do. Taking a deep breath, she stepped forward and gently took his hand in hers, looking up and smiling, suddenly feeling happier than she could ever remember being. "Nothing will happen," she said, trying to reassure him.

"You can't know that."

"You're talking to the psychic, here," she quipped, quirking an eyebrow.

His lips twitched into a smirk for a small moment before returning to his sombre look. "I just think that you should-"

Isa pushed herself up onto her tip-toes and grabbed hold of the lapels of his coat, cutting him off mid-sentence by pressing her lips to his in a soft kiss that lasted only a few seconds but left him speechless. "Trust me. It'll be fine."

He seemed unconvinced, but satisfied enough to let it lie and go along with the plan. 

Their plan had to work. It _had_ to. 

**II. **

The sun bore down on the long yet relatively small patch of sand surrounded by miles and miles of open waters, which glistened and reflected the midday light. It was hot and muggy, the only respite from the heat coming from the occasional breeze that blew across the ocean, which was filled with ships as far as the eye could see. On either end of this long 'island' were two small rowboats, the occupants of which had exited and were making their way towards the showdown. Isa, Theo and Jack trudged along the sand, which was deceptively soft and deep in places, towards Beckett, Will and Jones (in his bucket, of course) who were merely standing and waiting at the other end. This was it, the final face-off between the pirates and the EITC, where they would size their enemy up and remain steadfast in their own resolve to-

"Oh god _dammit_."

Isa stopped and turned in time to see Theo plonking herself down onto the sand and pull off her boot. "What... are you doing?"

Theo pouted, turning her boot upside down and shaking it. "I got a stone in my boot somehow. Why the hell couldn't they meet us halfway?"

Isa rolled her eyes, and when Theo had finally finished putting her boot back on they made the rest of the distance, where began the staring match. Beckett regarded Isa coldly, looking her up and down before raising an eyebrow and smirking ever so slightly. 

"Oh my," he began, voice cold. "Crossed over to the other side, I see."

"Damn right she did," Theo said, chest puffed out with pride. "_We_ have the cookies!" 

Isa rolled her eyes. "You made me make a choice and I did." She shrugged. "Sorry it wasn't the choice you wanted."

"You could have been highly valued in the EITC," he continued, "yet you choose to sign your own death certificate? Intriguing. You should take a leaf from Mr Turner's book in how to ensure one's survival in this world."

"Oh, don't even get me started on him," Theo said, glaring pointedly at Will. "We will be having words in the not too distant future." Will seemed a little wounded at her words, but said nothing, knowing that now isn't the best time to be getting into an argument with Theo.

Beckett turned his attention to Jack, after having glanced at Theo whilst she was talking. He missed the subtle wink from the Pirate King to the captain of the Dutchman, but Will had caught it, and sent Theo a questioning look. She just smiled a knowing smile and, for obvious reasons, kept mum. 

"Captain Sparrow, you have nothing to say after your daring attempts to betray your fellow pirates?"

"Not a thing," he said, smiling. "Fancy that, eh? Captain Sparrow without a thing to say!"

"There's a first for everything," Will muttered. 

"Oh William, you wound me, after I came out here to save you."

"We've come to give you one last chance to withdraw with your life," Theo said, confidently. 

Beckett gave a short, sharp laugh. "You're giving _me_ one more chance? Whatever gave you the idea that you're in a position to do that?"

"Isa's seen your end, Becks."

"Oh?" He turned and fixed his gaze on Isa once more. "Do tell."

"There's not much to tell," she said. "You die because you try to play everyone for a fool and in the end, you and the EITC will fall. The Dutchman and the Pearl will launch a devastating attack on you and you won't survive it."

He watched her for a moment, trying to find some hint that she was lying. "Interesting story. I'll be sure to have it written up and published once we get back to Port Royal." 

There was a small part of Isa that was sad at the fact that Beckett refused to see sense or even try to resolve things amicably and without the need for any loss of life, but she knew he would use that against her because that was the kind of man he was. It was all good business, after all. She really was fond of the man, but unfortunately that didn't mean much to anybody right now, least of all her. Shrugging her shoulders, she turned to Theo. "Told you he couldn't be convinced. You owe me a fiver."

"Aw, dammit. I was sure the impending doom card would work."

She sighed. "Some people just can't see past their own ego."

Beckett twitched, apparently not liking being talked about as if he wasn't in the room... or rather, on the island. "I don't think you realise the gravity of the situation. _You_ are the ones who will be oblitera-"

Finally sick of the nonsense he was spouting, Isa turned and administered a killer right hook which clipped him on the chin, making him spin around and land face first in the sand. He was out cold. Everyone stared at his motionless form for a moment, then turned and looked at Isa, who was shaking her hand of the pain and cramp that came from the punch. 

Theo was impressed. "Dude... That right there? AWESOME."

Jones was still staring at Beckett. "Why didn't I think of that?" 

Isa shrugged. "Well, you _were_ surrounded by the entire Royal Navy, who had your heart surrounded by sharp, pointy objects." 

"Ah, the heart. How will I get it back?"

Isa pondered for a moment. "The Dutchman can submerge, right?" He nodded. "Then... just submerge the ship? I mean, the heart is there, and the guys on board are mortal..."

"Huh. Why didn't I think of _that_?"

"I have no idea what's going on here," Will said, with a slight whimper. Nobody had filled him in on the newfound friendship between pirate and Dutchman, so he was naturally a little confused as to why they were all acting like old chums. Isa explained the whole situation, and everything that had happened since she left him with Beckett. Will said nothing during the whole recounting, and he said nothing for a while afterwards too. When he finally spoke, he sounded somewhat disappointed his devious plans had been trumped. 

"So, what do we do with him?" Will motioned to Beckett, who they had rolled over so that he didn't inhale sand. 

"We take him aboard the Pearl, and we let Jones do his groove thang," Isa said, smiling brightly. "Isn't that right, Theo-" She glanced around. "Theo? Where did she go?"

Jack tapped her on the shoulder, then pointed to where he was looking, which was out into the waters. Whilst they were all busy recounting their adventures to Will, she had taken the rowboat and gone a few yards out where she was happily splashing at the water's surface with her hand, leaning over so that she was precariously close to falling out of the boat. She knew that Theo could swim, but that didn't stop Isa from being worried. 

"Theo! What are you doing!" Theo looked up, then beamed when she saw the others all watching her. She waved, shouted something back, and then pointed to the water before clapping gleefully. "...does anybody know what she's saying?"

Jack raised an eyebrow. "Do we ever?"

"Good point." 

"Same could be said for you, Jack."

"Ouch, Will, again with the hurting." 

"Theo!" Isa motioned for her to come back to shore, but Theo just shook her head. Then suddenly there was an almighty roar as the water by the boat exploded and two large tentacles shot out into the air. The shockwaves sent them all hurtling backwards, losing their balance and landing on their backs on the sand. Isa clambered to her feet, ready to scream her head off in an unhelpful effort to see if Theo was okay... but she needn't have stressed, because the tentacles, far from tearing the girl limb from limb, were actually tossing her into the air and catching her again as she squealed gleefully. 

Will rubbed his eyes as if he didn't quite believe what he was seeing. "...is that a kraken?"

"Yes. Yes it is."

"I thought you had the last one," he asked Jones.

"I did. Maybe it survived?"

"No, we saw yours dead on the beach of some island," Isa said, shaking her head. They were all watching as Theo was tossed high into the air, always caught on her way down before she impacted with the water. "This is..."

"...fantastic," Jack said, smirking. 

"How d'you figure? Theo's new friend isn't exactly a puppy."

"No, it's a kraken." Jack looked around, expectantly. After a moment he rolled his eyes. "Awesome, fearsome, arrgh-some?"

Isa finally caught on. "Oh! You mean it could..." She punched the palm of her hand as if this explained her point. Jack nodded. "Against the..." She pointed out towards the hundreds of EITC ships. Again, Jack nodded. 

"That's if it can be controlled," Jones said, looking dubiously out at where Theo was now sliding down the tentacle and being caught. "It doesn't exactly strike fear in _my_ heart."

"Well, you may not be able to control it, but I think we know exactly who can." 

**III.**

It was another hour before Theo came back to shore, followed closely by a large tentacle which seemed more timid than fearsome. During that time, Beckett had groaned and moved, so Isa, Jack and Will had tied him up and tossed him into the other boat where they each took turns in keeping watch, although Isa was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to do very much. It was Will's turn when Theo came ashore, looking quite pleased with herself. She probably wasn't expecting the barrage of questions from the rest of her troupe though; 'where did that kraken come from?', 'how did you tame it?', 'how did you even find it?', to name but a few. 

Theo blinked. "I just found it... Or rather, it found me." She turned to Isa with big Bambi eyes. "Oh, can we keep him? Can we please?" She tugged at her shirt sleeve. "Pleeeease?"

"I dunno, Theo, krakens take a lot of care and attention..."

"I know! I'll totally look after him."

"He'll be your responsibility, I won't be chasing after you to look after your pet." Theo nodded, vigorously. "And he'll have to help in our efforts to defeat the East India Trading Company, too." Again, Theo nodded with vigour. "Oh... alright then. You can keep him."

"Ohmygod, yay! Did you hear that, El Diablo!" 

Apparently the kraken _did_ hear that because it grabbed both Theo and Isa by the midriff and gave a gentle squeeze before letting the latter of the two go and went about hugging Jack and Jones, who were both less than enthusiastic about it but went along nevertheless. Isa laughed. "El Diablo?"

"Ed for short!"

She shook her head. "Well, you and Ed can talk with Davy about how to get rid of those ships."

"Is it even possible?" Will had joined them to switch watch-guard duty. 

Theo nodded. "We have the Dutchman and its Captain, we have Ed, we have Calypso and we have the Pearl, how can we _not_ win?" 

Will smirked. "Funny how the tables have turned so quickly."

"I suspect our luck changed with the arrival of you strangers," Jack said, nudging Theo in the ribs. 

"Damn right," Theo declared. 

Isa shook her head. "You lot do your thang and I'll keep a watch on half-pint." 

"Godspeed." Theo saluted. 

Isa returned the salute. "Aye." She wandered towards the end of the island again, where she could see Beckett wriggling inside the boat on his stomach, trying in vain to break free from his restraints. Without a word, Isa climbed in and sat down, putting her feet up beside Beckett's head with a loud thump which knocked him from his concentration for a moment. After a little more wriggling he managed to turn himself over onto his back, and then just glared at the young girl, losing his cool, calm façade for the first time since she had met him. She reached forward and gently undid the gag tied around his head, suspecting that he had more than a few words he wanted to get off his chest. For a while he didn't say anything, apparently so incensed that he couldn't form a sentence. 

"How did you do it?"

Isa stared nonchalantly out to sea, trying to count the number of ships on the horizon. "Do what?"

"Jones, the kraken... how?"

"How did we get one over on you, you mean?" She thought on it a while. It was odd to think that they, two girls from England who had never been farther than the local supermarket, had been thrown head-first into this world of piracy and war and had just dealt with it. Not only that but the various events that had unfolded had all worked in their favour, somehow letting the two girls coast along and even enjoy their experiences here. It was beyond bizarre. "I guess we were just lucky."

"Lucky? You got Jones to switch sides without the heart. I'm mighty curious to find out who exactly you managed to go about that." 

"Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies," Isa replied, being as vague as she could possibly hope to be. There was no point in explaining herself to him, nor did she have any good reason why she should have to. Upon making this point to him, Beckett narrowed his eyes.

"I took you in, gave you a position of power and this is how you give thanks? You could have been the most powerful woman sailing on open seas and instead you decide to side with.. with... _pirates_?" That last word was dripping with venom, as if even saying the word was taboo for him. 

It was slightly disconcerting for Isa to see him like this, finding her mind wandering back to the time she spent with him on the Endeavour, though strangely not feeling as nostalgic about it as she thought she would. "I side with my best friend, and I never said I wouldn't. She just happens to be a pirate."

"_You_ aren't a pirate."

"No, I'm not. But I can deal with that for now. Now, unfortunately for you, you are now held captive by this pirate. While I'll do my best to keep you from being killed I can't make any promises."

"So you were feigning interest?"

She knew what he meant; he meant 'interest' with air quotes. She leant forward so that her nose was an inch from his. "You know the sad thing? I could probably have fallen in love with you." 

She sat up straight upon hearing Theo calling her name. After giving a wave to say she heard, she took the gag and put it back on Beckett, ignoring the protests of her captive before getting out of the boat and walking along the golden sand towards what she knew would be the beginning of the end of this war. 

This ends here and now. 


	19. Red Hot

Summary: A magical compass sends two girls into a world where pirates are facing extinction

**A/N:** Me again, lawlz. XD So this fic is finally drawing to a close. There's only one, possibly two more chapters to go, people. Kinda sad about this ending, but alas, we all know what they say about all good things and all. I won't do the whole "it's been great" thing just yet, though. ;D

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End  
****Chapter Nineteen: Red Hot **

**I. **

"I've told you a thousand times, I can't do that."

Theo crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes as she glowered at Jones. "Why not? I thought this was the new and improved Jonsey?"

After the group left the small patch of sand Jones had returned to the Dutchman and, as Isa had suggested, submerged his ship to get rid of the officers that were on board and also to recover his heart which he pledged to give to Calypso when all was done. She, in return, turned he and his crew back to their human forms before they sailed to the Cove where they all reconvened to try and work out what they would do now. Will had then confronted Jones about the years that his father had left to serve, and whether it can be cancelled somehow. The short answer would have been 'no' but neither Will nor Theo seemed willing to accept the short answer, thus begun a half-hour long argument about said issue. Jones, try as he may, couldn't get them to see that servitude was a contract of sorts that he couldn't just go around dismissing. Besides; he needed a crew to do his job.

"Aye, but I tell you now as I've told you before; I cannot change anybody's years of servitude whilst I remain captain of the Dutchman. When they agreed to sail under my flag it's almost as good as them signing a binding contract in blood," he spoke slowly, trying to make the group see things from his point of view although his efforts had been fruitless so far. "I cannot undo it."

Isa could sort of see it from his side, though she daren't say that within earshot of the two pirates arguing with the captain. Just because he had changed doesn't mean the whole structure of the ship was going to change. Then again, she could see Will's side too, since all he wanted was to know his father. She had decided to sit the argument out precisely because she could understand both sides of the argument and would probably make pointless contributions anyway, and also because it really wasn't anything to do with her right now.

"You can undo it! You're the captain, for goodness' sake!" Will gave a frustrated grunt before closing his eyes and seemingly urging himself to calm down. "Alright, then I'll take half of his burden."

Everyone turned to stare, and for a while nobody said a word, not really knowing if he was serious or not. Theo was first to break the silence. "What?"

"Half his remaining years. I will serve them."

"Woah, Will, you should think about-"

"I've thought about it, and I've made my decision," he interjected. "This is what I want to do."

Isa glanced at Jones. "Would that even be allowed?"

He looked bewildered. "I've never been asked. Nobody's ever _wanted_ to serve on my ship, afterall."

Theo gave a cough that sounded suspiciously like 'no kidding', though she feigned innocence afterwards. She looked at Will, concern marring her green eyes. "Are you sure?"

Will smiled, albeit sadly. "Yes."

"Alright then, I'll go with you."

Isa can't say she was really surprised, she had been expecting something like that from the moment Will had made his own declaration. Apparently, however, nobody else knew Theo quite as well, because they were now staring at Theo with an equal amount of shock as they'd stared at Will with.

Will grabbed Theo by the shoulders. "No, I won't let you take on this burden."

Theo quirked an eyebrow. "Oh really? What makes you think you can stop me."

"I won't ask you to-"

"I know," Theo said, holding her hands up to silence him. "I know you won't, I'm offering." When Will started to speak again she held her hand up again. "I'm offering because I want to, because it's the right thing to do, and because I don't want to not see you for forty to fifty years." She shrugged, smiling sheepishly at Will who smiled back at her. "Besides," she chirped, turning to Jones, "a third is less than a half, right?"

"I haven't even agreed to his terms yet," he grumbled.

"Oi, you totally owe us one after Isa and I played cupid with you two to stop you from, like, killing each other." Theo waggled her finger at the captain, who just rolled his eyes.

"You're the Pirate King, you can't just decide to serve time on the Dutchman without considering that," Will frowned, though he didn't seem so against the idea now.

"I'll leave Jack or Barbossa in charge until I get back, of course. One can have the Pearl whilst the other Kings about, right?"

Maybe it was the uncharacteristically pleading voice that convinced Will to accept her wishes, or maybe he was wishing for this outcome more than he realised, but he didn't offer any more arguments, and nodded to Jones, who glanced at Calypso. She was smiling, so he took that as a positive sign.

"Its acceptable, aye."

"Even though they didn't die at sea?"

"Neither did Bootstrap," Theo nodded.

"Good point, amigo," Isa said, grinning. She'd started to make her way to the court when Theo collared her, walking with her in silence until they were a fair distance from the rest of the group, where she stopped.

"You don't mind, do you?"

"Mind?" Isa stopped to look at Theo, who was fidgeting with her sleeve trimmings, nervously. "Mind what?"

"Me using the favour card for this. I mean, we might be able to get Calypso's help getting home or something. I can always say I changed my mind?"

Isa stopped to think on this for a moment; it was no secret that when the girls had arrived she had not slipped into her role as pirate as smoothly as Theo had, because thinking pirates were cool was one thing but trying to live as one was a whole other matter. She had been itching to get back home, back to the luxuries and comforts that hadn't even been invented and wouldn't be invented for another few centuries, back home where she could have a long, hot bath and forget about the trials they'd both gone through... but, and she had no idea when exactly this had happened, she realised with a start that the itch had gone. She supposed that she had finally embraced her true pirate when she had set foot on Shipwreck island, or perhaps it was when she saw that Theo had been made King of the Brethren Court, which, by all standards, was probably as much proof of Theo belonging there as she was ever going to get.

Then again, perhaps it was another reason altogether. Over Theo's shoulder Isa caught sight of Norrington and smiled. "It's fine," Isa said, sighing in an overly dramatic fashion. "We can stay pirates."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Reallyreally, no taksie backsies?"

"Reallyreally, Theo."

Theo launched herself at Isa, and they both fell over, knocking a barrel of gunpowder all over the place and momentarily causing a world of chaos.

**II.**

Theo had called the Brethren court together not long after she had managed to clean all the powder off their clothes - Isa had chosen to change her outfit altogether - and whilst it had taken a while to wake those required to attend from their drunken stupors, wake them she did. Isa was sat slouched in a chair with her feet on the large oval table with King Theo, who had managed to get her hands on the most elaborately throne-like chair ever, on one side and a very disgruntled looking Beckett tied up and thrown in a chair on the other. The main purpose of the meeting was to share their plan for what would happen now that they had Beckett and Jones on side. They needed to share this information so that they could get to work as soon as possible to avoid the Navy ships getting a little too antsy.

Unfortunately the pirates didn't seem to take to the idea of not stringing Beckett up very well.

"...and explain again," Barbossa said to Theo, twitching slightly, "why we can't just gut the little swine?" He leant on the table not far from Isa's worn boots to get eye contact with his King.

Theo sighed. "For the thousandth time, we need to keep him alive so that we can get the entire army off our backs." She spoke in a slow, deliberate tone that got Barbossa's hackles up even more.

"What better way to do that than to get rid!" The pirates around him roared in agreement, and a few drew their weapons and waved them in the air as some sign of solidarity. Barbossa continued. "We must ensure our survival and if it means the death of this curr then I can't see the problem."

Without warning he drew his pistol and aimed for Beckett's head and instead found himself staring down the barrels of Isa's pistols, the girl having stood with equal swiftness and pulled her own weapons. There was a wave of clicks and the occasional shout as guns were drawn all around the room and pointed at Isa, who didn't move her eyes from Barbossa's face, on which there was a look of surprise and disgust.

"Before you start your tirade, captain," Isa interrupted as he opened his mouth to speak, "I understand your anger, especially since the man who caused it all is... well, right there. Think though; what good will it do to kill this one man?" She shifted her gaze so that her blue eyes met with Beckett's own, watching him shuffle uncomfortably with a small sense of satisfaction. "They would only find another like him, and the Navy would be right back at our door one way or another, with the Dutchman's help or not."

Theo nodded. "Killing one man won't stop the war," she said, looking around the room at all the drawn pistols with a surprising amount of seriousness. "Right now we have an opportunity to use him to our best advantage."

Jack gave a noise of understanding. "You mean you have a plan?"

"Yep."

"A cunning, devious and sorely underhanded one?"

"Of course."

"Then I absolutely agree with it," he said, swaggering over to the throne and draping himself across the back. "Anything devious and underhand certainly has my vote."

Norrington rolled his eyes. "Why does that not surprise me?"

"Oh James, you wound me."

"Sometimes we wish that were true," Will muttered.

Jack gave a pitiful gasp. "Et tu, William?!"

"So," Isa began, pausing for a moment to hook her weapons back into her belt before she went on, "you can either shoot him now, be satisfied for all of, ooh, two minutes, before Jones has to bugger off back to his day job and the navy come back to kick your arses-"

"Or," Theo cut in, leaning forwards onto the table and grinning. "Or we can use the most deceitful, Machiavellian thing I can think of."

"And what might that be?"

"Blackmail."

There was a moment of silence before Barbossa put his weapon down, leading the rest of the rabble to put away their own. At least he seemed willing to listen for the time being. "What exactly do you hold over him?"

"That he's a branded pirate, of course."

The room erupted in laughter, and until they all settled down neither Isa nor Theo moved or backed down or let on that this was a joke. Pretty soon they began to realise that perhaps they were being serious, and began to look between the girls and the Lord, questioningly.

Beckett was making noises behind his gag, so Isa removed it for him to give him a chance to reply the allegations. "I've never heard such nonsense in my life, I am not a pirate," he spat.

"We'll have the proof, Becksie," Theo chirped. "We make pretty convincing liars, don't we?"

"I'll deny it."

It was Isa's turn to laugh. "The brand? The mark on your skin that is only given to those convicted of piracy? Being captured by pirates and then, for some reason, released without a scratch on you? Jones inexplicably turning the tables and fighting for the pirates instead?" She sat on the table in front of him, smiling pleasantly. "The evidence is quite damning, Lord Beckett."

He kept his voice level, maintaining his cool exterior even though he was looking a little rough around the edges. "Evidence? There is no evidence; I have no brand and I am no pirate."

"Oh, we can fix one of those problems, at least," Theo said, hopping off her throne and skipping through to another room and returning with a poker, on the end of which was a brand in the shape of a 'P'. Theo waggled her eyebrows as it suddenly dawned on Beckett what they were planning on doing, breaking his cool façade somewhat. She nodded to Isa and then retreated back into the room.

"You can't-"

"Can't we?" Isa gasped. "Oh well." She dragged him up by the collar and dragged him over to the fire. The pirates just watched in shock and awe as she dragged their adversary into the next room and closed the door, unsure about what, if anything, they should be doing. They settled on waiting patiently.

"Where are we gonna brand him?" Theo put the brand back into the heat whilst they discussed.

"I dunno, the arm?"

"Meh, boring."

"Boring? Theo, it's a brand, not a fashion statement. Where would _you_ want to brand him?"

Theo pondered on the question a moment, tapping her finger to her lips in deep contemplation before a lewd grin spread across her features and she began to cackle, slightly. At the slightly terrified and inquiring looks she got she cleared her throat. "How about down south?"

Isa nearly choked on air. "You mean..."

Theo nodded before turning back to a terrified Beckett. "Bend over and drop 'em, sweetheart." Whether it was sheer terror or genuine confusion Isa didn't know, but Beckett just stood there, frozen, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights to use the cliché. After a moment she sighed and nodded to Isa, who span him around and pushed him into a desk, causing him to bend over and expose his derrier to the possibly-deranged pirate king.

Theo waited, expectantly, then pointed at him when she got no response. "I can't brand him through his slacks, can I?"

"Oh, hey, no, _you_ wanted to brand him there, _you_ can do it."

Theo sighed, grimacing. "Oh well, needs must."

"What do you want?!"

Theo stopped dead, not recognising the shrill screams coming from their captor. "What?"

Seeing her lower the poker Beckett seemed to regain a little dignity, though not much, since Isa had him pinned so that he was still stood in a rather compromising position. He cleared his throat. "What do you want?"

"Like, our demands?"

"Yes, for your silence, for you to let me go."

Theo glanced at Isa, who shrugged. "Well, we want you to relinquish lordship," Isa began, not really going with a pre-prepared speech, opting to just wing it, "and obviously you are to leave piracy well alone. I don't care what you do or where you go or what happens to the EITC, but you are to stay away from the pirates if you want to keep loose lips from spilling some secrets."

"Yes, yes," he said, impatiently, "now let me go."

"Let you go?"

"I'll agree to your demands, now let me-"

Theo snorted. "Dude, how stupid do you think we are? We're not letting you go without this," she said, waggling the brand about. "We'd have no leverage then, would we? Although, thinking on what you said, Isa. Who would we get to replace Becks? I mean, it'd need to be someone who knows how things work there, but also someone who's, you know, on our side." She furrowed her brow.

"Oh, I think I have an idea," Isa said after a moment's thought. "You just focus on the task at hand."

"Ahahaha, I totally see what you did there. T-ASS-k?" Theo frowned when she didn't get the reaction she wanted. "Yeesh, you're a tough crowd, aren't you?" She gripped the poker tightly. "Sorry you don't have a pillow to bite into, dearest."

Isa almost felt bad for Beckett. Almost.


	20. Full Circle

**A/N:** So it comes to an end. ;-; Alas, all good things must come to an end right? :C Still, it's pretty damn sad when something you've loved and worked on for months finishes. Like the dork that I am, I teared up whilst writing this, but don't tell anybody, lawl. XD So yes, I hope you all enjoyed the ride as much as I did, and maybe in the future I'll revisit the girls to see what's happened to them. ;D You never know what the future brings, right?

So yes, this is Isaviel Snape, signing off _So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End_ for the very last time. It'd been grand, folks!

**Disclaimer:** Nothing from the Pirates of the Caribbean series belongs to me. Theoli and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Gale and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts.

* * *

**So Sue Me: Self-Inserts at World's End**  
**Chapter Twenty: Full Circle**

**I. **

Isaviel stood at the large windows of what used to be Beckett's study, looking out towards the edge of the ocean with a strange mixture of excitement and sadness in her heart. The last time that she had been standing in this room she'd been offered a place in Beckett's 'posse' if she would just do a bit of betraying here and there, working as a pirate to find and weed out those who were in hiding. Both she and Theo had been quite naïve in what she thought was going to be her job and neither of them could have dreamed of imagining the adventure that they would face over the following weeks, travelling from Port Royal to the literal end of the world and back again, back to where it all started... well, just about where it started.

It had actually been surprisingly easy to convince everyone to turn and head back; none of them wanted to go up against the Dutchman and Pearl together, add to that the fact that the pirates now also had a new Kraken and you have yourselves a bloody good reason to go home. It had struck Isa as a bit odd that they didn't seem to fight the decision a bit more but Norrington was relieved not to have to fight for the plan to be set in motion. Perhaps Isa was being a little cynical but she didn't dare to trust anything until the plan was complete. But now, standing where she was in the knowledge that Beckett was on his way back to whatever rock he had crawled out from under was enough for her to allow herself a small sigh of relief; it was over. Or, at least, it was very close to being over. All that was left was to tie up all loose ends before sundown, when the Dutchman would have to leave and return to its day job with two new crewmembers.

Isa pursed her lips, furrowing her brow for a moment as the doubt in her mind began to make its presence known. Before any second thoughts could enter her mind she shook her head, refusing to let the fact that she would miss Theo put the kibosh on the whole operation. Okay, so they were going to be apart for a little bit but hey, 10 years wasn't such a long wait, was it?

A light knock on the door snapped her out of her musings, reminding her that there were still things to get done before the day was over. She turned and smiled at Norrington, who had changed into a clean uniform, as he walked towards her.

"Are you all right?"

"Of course," Isa replied. Apparently she wasn't fooling him or his inquiring look, so she gave a light shrug. "It's just strange that it's over, you know? That we saved piracy."

"Yes," he agreed, "but it's not _truly_ over; not yet. We still need to fix all of the problems that Beckett created with his heavy handed tactics, not to mention the problem of those pirates that had been set for hanging."

Isa shuddered as she recalled the sight of the bodies, the sheer numbers making it difficult for them to be disposed of quickly; most of them had already been dumped in the seas, but with what seemed like every ship the Navy had loitering around Shipwreck Cove the rate at which that happens had grown very slow. The decision was made to continue the burials at sea, since the sea was probably more home to those pirates than any place on land had been.

The problem with the pirates still alive and in prison gave Isa a headache. "Can't we just let them all go? Maybe give them a complimentary fruit basket to make amends?"

"What, all goodness knows how many hundreds of them at once?" Norrington shook his head. "If we want to keep things going without any mass panic we need to avoid drawing attention to the pirates. Something tells me hoards of them heading to the dock at once _may_ draw some attention."

"Well, maybe a little."

Quite honestly, Isa was beyond astonished that any of this had even _worked_, and really had no idea how they would make the situation _continue_ to work - Theo had proposed that they try some kind of dance-therapy thing for the pirates and Navy to try and 'cultivate some beautiful friendships', but then said she'd prefer it was put on hold for ten years because she didn't want to miss an epic dance-off. Still, they'd managed this far by winging it, so a little more can't but help can it?

"Besides, we don't have nearly enough fruit baskets for them all. Also," Norrington continued, "don't you need to sort some things before Theoli leaves?"

"Oh, yes," Isa remembered with a start; she wasn't going to let her best friend sail off to the end of the world without a parting gift. "Where is the King anyway?"

"She said she has her own stuff to sort out before she left, top of the list being to name an acting-King for the time she's away."

"...she's not going to hold an election is she?"

Norrington smirked, amused at how well she knew her friend. "She was considering it, but decided it was too much effort to try and design her promotional materials and ballots before the sun set, so she said she would just pick someone."

"As long as it's not Jack, we should be fine," Isa mumbled. "Right, I have some shopping to do."

**II. **

It turned out that Theo had been earning her title as king, setting out some kind of regulation to stop from causing the world of piracy to go to pot... again. After that was done she had announced who would take her place while she was off on the Dutchman and much to everybody's surprise, none more so than the person she chose, she decided to hand her crown to Elizabeth Swann. Yeah, who'da thunk it, right?

After that was sorted she had set about saying goodbyes to _every single pirate_ she had met, which took practically the entire afternoon, leaving her just a little time before the sun would set. She arrived at the beach with an two or three hours to spare and met up with Isa, as well as the crew (no pun intended) who the girls had travelled with throughout their long journey. Then true to form she set up a makeshift barbeque and the group had a beach party which lasted until the time came for goodbyes to be said.

Isa watched the horizon as the sun inched ever closer to it, only half paying attention to the conversations going on behind her. Theo was saying her goodbyes and if she listened to those she wouldn't be able to say her own, so she chose to tune out and focus on the calm waters upon which the Dutchman was sat, waiting for its last two crewmembers to board before setting off.

She was lost with her own thoughts when a tap on the shoulder broke her thought bubble. "Oh, hey Will. All set to leave?"

He nodded. "Both of us sorted any outstanding business this morning and ran all errands we needed to."

"That's good," she replied, half-heatedly. She just couldn't get too excited about Theo leaving.

"Are you alright with her leaving?"

Isa sighed. "Am I okay with it? Not one bit, but that's no reason to keep her from doing something she felt so passionately about when agreeing to do it. Especially if it's with someone she truly cares for," she gave Will a sidelong glance. He merely cleared his throat, so she went on, smirking slightly, "besides, it's not that long. Jones said he'd cut y'all a deal about the time you have to serve too, so you'll be back before we realise you're gone." She turned to look him square in the eye. "You'd better look after her."

Will smiled. "As much as she'll let me look after her."

"Well, yes, but you know what I mean."

"I do, and you have my word, I will look after her."

Isa smiled. "Thanks."

Theo bounded over, vaulting herself a little so she was hanging around Will's neck. "What're you fuddy-duddies looking so woeful about?!"

"Oh, I dunno Theo," Isa said, thoughtfully, "maybe the fact that you're off gallivanting to the end of the world for TEN YEARS?"

"Ah, yes, that. Well, apart from that, then."

"Oh, _apart_ from that? I got nothing."

Will coughed. "Mind if I get my neck back?"

"Oh, my bad," she said, letting go and dropping back onto the sand.

"Well, I'll get back to the others," he said, then walked away, rubbing his neck.

For a moment the girls said nothing, suddenly not knowing what to say. They'd known each other for forever but they had never been faced with a situation like this so it was hard to know what the right thing to say _was_. After a moment Theo gave some light-hearted banter a go.

"Y'know, this is all getting tied up very neatly," she said, stroking her imaginary beard, "I'm almost suspicious."

Isa nodded, "I know right? It's just weird how the fight was just... stopped. Eh, nevermind, I can roll with it."

"You know, there used to be a time where you'd want to know the hows and whys and whatthehells to this mystery. Or call Scooby and the gang."

"Yeah, I came to realise how utterly tiring that was."

"Like I've been saying," Theo said, "Just roll with it, it'll work out alright."

"Has done so far, I guess," Isa agreed, and Theo nodded.

Again they fell silent, standing side by side as the sun kept getting lower and lower in the sky. Neither wanted to say goodbye, but it came to a point where Isa knew that what had to be had to be, whether they wanted it or not. She glanced at Theo without turning, "Don't drive Will crazy while you're away."

Theo snorted. "I'm sure Will's used to my wacky awesome by now, and if not, he has plenty of time to _get_ used to it. You," She turned to face Isa, "No making Norri work too hard, unless, y'know..." She waggled her eyebrows suggestively, which only served to earn her a playful smack over the head. "Oww... anyway, as I was saying, don't stress so much about stuff; it'll work itself out in the end."

"Oh yeah? What if you come back in 10 years and everything's gone to hell?"

"Oh, pfft, that won't happen and you know it. You stop _me_ from doing crazy shit and that's an epic achievement in itself."

"I hope you're right, Theo."

"I am," she said confidently. "Like I said, there's little point in worrying over this stuff so much, about the future being so ambiguous I mean. As long as there's something in your life that's certain then there's no need to really stress, y'know?"

"That makes a lot of sense."

"Don't sound too surprised, I do have the odd gem locked away up here," she said, tapping her forehead. "They just get buried under all the cracky stuff."

The girls giggled together until the laughter slowly ebbed away, leaving another short silence. Well, now was as good a time as any. Isa reached into her pocket and took out a small box covered in red velvet, then handed it to Theoli, who just stared at the box for a moment.

Slowly she took the box into her hand as if she wasn't entirely sure what to do with it and when Isa motioned for her to open it so she did, lifting the lid slowly and gently, gasping when she saw what was inside. "Oh my God, Isa..." Inside the box was a small, silver locket with a ruby in the middle, with an elaborate engraving snaking and weaving all around its edges. Picking it up by its delicate silver chain, she held it up to the light, staring in awe as the glow from the waning sun shone through the red ruby and glistened off the locket's surface, revealing the engraving on the back which read _'IDK MY BFF'_. She turned back to Isa. "I... didn't get you anything."

Isa smiled. "I don't mind."

"But, you won't have anything to remind you of me!" She glanced around, probably contemplating the idea of picking up random crap from the beach and giving it to her friend as a 'piece of modern art' or something.

"Not that I would need an _object_ to do that," Isa said, grinning, "but I'm set." Then reached under the collar of her shirt, revealing her own locket, identical to Theo's except with a sapphire in place of a ruby. "Check inside."

She did so, and saw that inside the little necklace was a picture of the girls together, holding their cutlasses out in front of themselves with their blades crossed over. Theo sniffed loudly, then threw her arms around Isa and squeezed her until Isa thought she was going to run out of oxygen, but thankfully she let go and excitedly put the locket on.

A shout from the sea made the girls look up. An approaching rowing boat meant that it was time for Theo and Will to leave the beach and get back to the ship, a moment that Isa had been dreading for the whole day. The knots in her stomach tightened as she glanced at her best friend, giving what she hoped was a cheerful smile. "See you in ten years." She had to bite her lip to stop herself from bawwww-ing like a baby; she wouldn't cry because that'd just set them _both_ off and a crying pirate was probably not something the crew of the Dutchman wanted to deal with at this moment in time.

Theo seemed to be holding up well, too, though her bottom lip was wobbling. "Yeah," she managed. "Catch you on the flipside."

As way of parting Theo lifted a closed fist and Isa, grinning, lifted hers and the girls shared a knuckle touch. "Take care, homie."

Theo nodded, then climbed into the small rowing boat where Will and a couple of the crew were waiting. Isa watched as the boat got smaller and smaller as it moved further into the water until it met the Dutchman, where the occupants then joined the rest of their crew; they were so far away that Isa could no longer make out individual faces but she knew which one Theo was, she was the one at the stern waving her arms like a lunatic. Just as the Sun began to touch the horizon, the ship began to literally sail off into the sunset, watched by all those who had come to see Theoli and Will off. Then, with a flash of green light that spread throughout the darkening sky, the Flying Dutchman was gone.

Isa didn't leave her spot, even as the others began to leave until it was only Norrington and herself left, and even the former left after a while saying that he would be waiting back at the manor for her. She was sad, of course, but there was a sense of optimism growing within her.

The future was looking very uncertain for Isa, who only hoped that she could do a good job at restoring order to the oceans with the help of acting Pirate King Swann; she didn't know if it would work but she made the decision right then that she would just do her damnedest and hope for the best. Theo was right, and that worrying so much wouldn't help. Besides, as long as there was one certain thing in the future to cut through the confusion and uncertainty she would be fine.

Isa glanced at the reflection of the moon, a shimmering white glow upon the undisturbed surface of the water, and smiled.

She would see Theo again, that much was certain, and it was more than enough for Isa.

_**THE END**_


End file.
